Your Fault

Chapter 1 Noah

    ( If you guys have already read MY FAULT then you all should watch MY FAULT movie and give me the reviews if you guys liked the movie more or the book)

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I was finally eighteen years old.
I still remembered eleven months before that, when I started counting the days until I'd be an adult, able to make my own decisions, able to leave.
Obviously, things had changed in those past eleven months. So much so that I could hardly believe it. Not only had I gotten used to living here, but I even struggled to imagine living anywhere else. I'd found a niche at school and in the family I'd ended up with.
All the obstacles I'd needed to get through-not just over those months, but ever since I was born-had made me stronger, or so I thought.
Much had happened, not all of it good, but the best thing I'd managed to hold on to was Nicholas. Who'd have ever thought I'd wind up in love with him? And yet I was so madly in love that it made my heart ache. We'd had to get to know each other, to learn to make it as a couple, and that wasn't easy; it was something we had to work on every single day. Our personalities often clashed. Nick wasn't easy to put up with, but I was crazy about him.
That's why I was sad about my upcoming birthday party. Nick wasn't going to be there. I hadn't seen him in two weeks. He'd been spending a lot of time in San Francisco those past few months. He had a year left before he finished his degree and was taking advantage of all the doors his father had opened for him. The Nick who got into trouble was far away now. He was different: he'd matured, improved, even if I was afraid his old self might reemerge when I least expected it.
I glanced at myself in the mirror. I'd pulled my hair back over the crown of my head. It looked nice, perfect for the white dress my mother and Will had given me as a birthday present. My mother had gone overboard organizing the party. She said this would be her last chance to play the mommy role because in a week I'd be graduating from high school, and soon afterward, I'd be headed to college. I'd sent out tons of applications, but in the end, I'd opted for UCLA. I'd had enough of moving around and changes; I didn't want to go to another city, and I certainly didn't want to leave Nick. He was at the same school, and even if he would probably wind up moving to San Francisco to work at his father's new firm, I couldn't worry about that just then. There was still lots of time, and I didn't want to get depressed.
I stood from the makeup table, and before I put on my dress, I looked down at the scar on my stomach. I stroked that place where I would be marked, forever damaged, and I shivered. The sound of the shot that ended my father's life echoed through my head, and I had to take a deep breath to keep from losing my composure. I hadn't told anyone about my nightmares or how scared I was every time I thought about what had happened, how my heart started galloping whenever I heard loud sounds too close by. I didn't want to admit that my father had traumatized me again or that I couldn't stop thinking about him right beside me, dead, or the way his blood had splashed on my face. I kept all that to myself. I didn't want anyone to know I was even more damaged than before, on the edge of insanity, prey to the fears that man had awakened. My mother, on the other hand, was more relaxed than she'd ever been because the fear she'd kept hidden had disappeared. She was happy with her husband: she was free. But I still had a long road to travel.
"You're not dressed yet?" It was that voice, the one that made me crack up almost every single day.
I turned toward Jenna, and a smile spread across my face. My best friend was stunning, as always. She had recently cut her long hair to shoulder-length. She tried to get me to do the same, but I knew Nick loved my hair long, so I'd left it untouched. It reached nearly to my waist by now, but I still liked it.
"Have I told you already how much I admire that pert butt of yours?"
she asked, slapping my ass for good measure.
"You're nuts," I said, grabbing my dress and throwing it over my head.
Jenna walked over to the safe, just under a shelf of shoes. I didn't have the combination, I'd never used it, but once Jenna learned about it, she started using it herself, hiding all sorts of stuff inside.
I giggled when she brought out a bottle of champagne and two glasses.
"A toast, to our newly crowned adult," she said, filling the glasses and handing me one. I grinned. If Mom saw me, she'd kill me, but what the hell? It was my birthday; I deserved to celebrate, right?
"To us," I added.
We clinked our glasses and brought them to our lips. It was delicious; it had better be-that bottle of Cristal had cost more than three hundred dollars. But that was just how Jenna was. She did everything big, she was accustomed to luxury, and she'd never had to ask for anything.
"That dress is amazing," she said, gawking.
I smiled and took another look. It really was nice: white, tight-fitting, with delicate lace sleeves descending to my wrists, letting my skin show through its geometric openings. My shoes were fantastic, too, with heels so high, I was almost as tall as Jenna, who had donned a flounced burgundy dress for the occasion.
"There's a ton of people downstairs," she said, setting her glass next to mine. I guess she wasn't in a rush. I needed a drink, though, so I picked mine back up and downed it in one sip, feeling the bubbles pop in my throat.
"You don't say!" I exclaimed, to conceal my nerves. Suddenly, it felt hard to breathe. That dress was too tight; my lungs couldn't expand.
Jenna looked at me and smirked.
"What's so funny?" I asked, envious of her. What I'd have given not to be the center of attention.
"Nothing, I just know how you hate stuff like this. Take it easy, though.
I'm here, and I'll make sure we do it right."
She kissed me on the cheek, and I smiled at her, thankful. Maybe my boyfriend was missing my birthday, but at least I'd have my best friend by my side.
"Shall we?" she asked, smoothing down her dress.
"I guess we've got no choice!"