Sophist: The nerve of all of them. Inviting me there on such short notice. Even if I wanted to, my schedule wouldn't allow it!
Sophist: *picks up a clipboard and starts reading it*
Sophist: 4 o'clock, wallow in self-pity.
Sophist: 4:30, stare into the abyss.
Sophist: 5 o'clock, solve world hunger - tell no one.
Sophist: 5:30, jazzercise.
Sophist: 6:30, dinner with me. I can't cancel that again!
Sophist: 7 o'clock, wrestle with my self-loathing...I'm booked!
Sophist: Hmm, I could move the loathing to 9, I'd still be done in time to lay in bed, stare at the ceiling, and slip slowly into madness...
Sophist: ...
Sophist: BUT WHAT WOULD I WEAR?!
