Out of my Control

Chapter Six

Katrina Stephens

I never knew holding someone's hand can feel like this. The tingles spread throughout my whole body; this shouldn't be happening! He hasn't let my hand go once as we walk away from Lil Tuscany. I text Henry that I will find my own way home.

"Where should we go?"

"You tell me. You are the one asked me for another chance. "Giving him a sly smile. "I mean you should be better at this, right?" He's probably been on many dates as to my three relationships in my twenty-one years of life.

Stopping dead in his tracks, I almost stumble but he pulls me into his arms. How the hell did he do that? This guy is really smooth. "I didn't really think this through." Is he blushing? Rubbing the back of his neck as he looks into my eyes. "I just had to be with you any chance I got."

Did my heart just stop? Because it sure felt like it did. I can't let him know that he is getting to me. That really scares the crap out of me. I trusted someone before, and I got hurt badly.

"Why me?"

"Why not you?" I don't know what to say to that as I turn around and start walking. Just being in his arms makes me want to throw caution to the wind. But I can't and I won't be fooled again by charms alone. "Katrina."

"I'm not a model, I'm not spontaneous unless it's with Josh, he can get me into a lot of trouble. God knows he has done it plenty of times in our lives. Now I'm freaking rambling!" He chuckles but I keep walking, not knowing where the hell I am going, but I can't stand still next to him.  "I'm plain and I work in a bookstore. I'm a nerd as people might say and you..."

"What about me?" Are a freaking Greek God! But I am not telling you something you already know.

"I can bet you were mister popular in school and probably college. Let me guess you were a football player as well."

"I was." I knew it! Jocks don't go out with people like me! "Angel, that's not who I am though." Stopping I realize we are at the park by the man-made lake that they put in a few years back.

"Then who are you? Because someone like you, cannot be attracted to someone like me."

"I only stayed with you this long because I knew you would put out easily." I hate that he was right because he said all the right things, but it still hurt to hear. "Do you think I could have really loved you?" I thought you did. I should have seen the signs long before now. "Besides I know you are fucking your best friend."

"Are you kidding me? Josh is gay. Everyone knows that!" His hands tighten on the steering wheel. You tell me I was easy now you act jealous. I can't do this anymore! "Stop the car, Dylan!"

"Angel?" Snapping out of old memories I run my hand along my scar. "Where did you go?"

"Nowhere important." He looks like he is about to point out my lie, but I continue on. "You never answered my question."

Taking my hand, he brings it to his lips. Stop making me puddy in your hands! "I'm used to women throwing themselves at me." Not making your case here buddy. "They don't get to know the real me. Just because I have tattoos, piercings and am a big guy they think I'm a "bad boy" which I am far from it." I have definitely noticed that. "But you, Katrina don't melt to my charms." Keep smiling like that at me and I just might.

Shaking my head I step away from him. "This will not work, no matter what." Even if I am drawn to you.

"It can." I've heard that before.

"You'll get tired of me. They always do." Walking away from him and standing near the lake I take a deep breath. Do not cry!

"Who the fuck hurt you?!" There is anger in his voice that has shivers run through my body, but not in a horrible way. Turning me towards him those blue eyes of his will do me in. "I'm not a violent person but I have some crazy ass friends who will help me bury a body."

All the tension leaves my body as I laugh. "Should I be scared or flattered that you would bury a body for me?" Brushing the hair out of my face his fingertips linger on my scar. 

"Is that why you are scared?" To my surprise he moves his body and leans closer, his lips linger on my scar. "That you'll get hurt like that again." You shouldn't know these things about me already! 

I'm left speechless as he pulls me into a hug. I don't want to think about this anymore. "You're like a big cuddly teddy bear." That gets him to step back, and I can finally think clearly.  The blush that creeps up his neck is priceless. 

"I'm not, I'm a bad ass, remember."

"Whatever you say teddy bear."

"Angel."

Nope, none of that! My emotions are all over the place with thinking about the past. "Come on, I need a drink." I'm not a big drinker but I need to forget for right now.

"I know a place." He takes my hand and leads us back towards his car.

"Where are we going?" I know I should have asked this before I got in the car with him, but I can't think clearly and it's too late as we drive to our new destination.

"Where I am staying at."

"What?!" No this is not happening I am not going to where he is staying. That is just a disaster waiting to happen.

"Neveah Hotel Spa and Resort. They have a quiet lounge and have great drinks there. Plus, my buddy from college he owns the hotel."

"Does he live out here?"

Johnny laughs and for some reason it calms my nerves. One of those infectious laughs that either gets you laughing, or you just smile really big. "No, he lives in Ohio with his husband. I'm sure he would get along with Josh. Jax maybe not though as he is a jealous fucker. Well, they both are." He speaks so fondly of them.

"Is he your best friend?" Why is it so easy to talk to him? Even when I am nervous around him.

"No, he's a good friend. My best friend." His smile vanishes and I wish I could just see it again. "He's in Germany, hopefully will be home soon." The car stops and as I look out the window, I recognize this place. "Come on Angel, let's get you that drink."

"Are you trying to get me drunk?" Why did I say that?

"No, I would prefer you sober, but you need this for a reason you do not want to explain."

I don't know why I just didn't turn around, call Henry and call it a night. We sit in a booth and have a couple of drinks, but it was nice. We laughed until I almost cried, and he always had to touch my hand or my hair.

"You are a true beauty, Katrina. Something so rare."

"You really need to stop saying stuff to me like this." Lowering my head as the blush covers my cheeks.

"Why? You deserve to hear it every single day." Did I die? Because there is no way this man is real. Taking a sip of my drink to avoid the subject and I am grateful when he changes it too. We stayed talking until we eventually got kicked out. "Time escapes you when you are enjoying the company of someone as lovely as you." You are too smooth for your own good. How many women have you said that line to?

"I didn't know it was so late." Great now I have to find a way home. Surprisingly I am not drunk. We talked more than we drank, and I have never had that before with a man.

Heading towards the front of the hotel trying to figure out what to do, when I feel his hand touch mine. "Angel." Please stop calling me that. It does too many things to me. I'm too damn confused about you. "Stay the night. I don't want this night to end." I don't want it to either but if I stay, I might do something I know I shouldn't.

 What the hell am I supposed to do?