Crush 2021 (Tamber)

Chapter 12: silent treatment

So it's true what they say. In the beginning, it's easy. It's fresh and new. honeymoon phase. Well, as of late, Tara and I have made it out of that phase and into the harder stages of the relationship. Jealousy, uncertainty, and, as of right now, silent treatments.

Yup. it's been approximately 48 hours, and I don't know how many minutes since the last time Tara and I had a conversation. Although I wouldn't call it a conversation, it consisted of a lot of yelling and some swearing. The past couple of days, I've felt like a zombie and probably looked like one. Not only was I not speaking to Tara. I wasn't speaking to anyone.

I do that sometimes. At my worst, I stay away from people because I lash out easily. I refuse to have another person I love angry with me.

I was walking down the hall and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirrors above the sinks in the hand washing area. I had dark circles certainly and didn't much care to cover them up. My dark curly hair for once was not straightened, but in a messy low bun. I wore capri's and a band T shirt with vans. would you believe me if I said I was so heartbroken I didn't have the energy to keep myself up as usual.

I know this all seems out of nowhere, and maybe it is. but a couple of weeks after the camping trip, something did happen, and it caused a fight. I don't think we're broken up, but then again I don't know.

Mindy caught up with me as I continued walking down the hall, hoping she wouldn't see me.

"Hey!" She yelled, trying to keep up. "Hello!" She said, frustrated before reaching for my shoulders and  turning me around.

I stood there looking at the floor.

"Are you mad at me?" Mindy asked, concerned.

I shook my head no. I guess you could say I've taken a vow of silence.

"And why aren't you and Tara talking?"

I looked at her with furrowed eyebrows.

"Yeah, she told me, and that's ALL she told me before walking off. What is going on?" Mindy exclaimed.

I grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil out of my locker and wrote her a note before handing it to her.

" 'I don't wanna talk about it' " Mindy read out loud.

I knew she was looking at me, but I just couldn't meet her eyes.

"Look, no matter what happens, I'm your best friend, and you can ignore everybody in the world, but it's absolutely shitty of you to ignore me."

I looked at her with a dead expression. I wanted to talk. I just could not make myself.

"Right." She nodded with tight lips. "I don't know what's going on but I don't deserve to lose my best friend because of it."

She shoved the note against my chest and walked off.

I wanted to chase after her. To hug her and tell her I'm sorry, but I couldn't.

I stood in that spot until the bell rang and then I sat in the back of class far away from Tara.

She didn't look well either. Her dark brown hair and bangs were silky as usual, but she didn't dress her normal way. The pep was gone, like the life that felt drained out of me.

I wasn't stalking her, just observing. I looked down at my empty work sheet.  it was due by the end of class, and I had nothing written down. I didn't care much either.

~~~

The bell rang, and I waited for Tara to walk out before I got up and tried to leave, but not before the teacher caught me.