❝ are they second-hand embarrassed that I can't get out of bed ❞
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Taylor's pov :
I tossed and turned in my bed, finding myself unable to fall asleep, just as it had been every night for the past two weeks. Two weeks ago today I had driven Alana back to the home and left her there even though every part of me didn't want to. And since then, all I have been left with is sickening anxiety.
It had been days since Alana had messaged me, I had continuously messaged her first, asking what she had to eat, asking how her day at school had been, asking how she was - all left on delivered. The more I thought about it, the more restless I became. Nothing about this felt right, being ignored by Alana didn't seem like something she would do, she was the same girl who had bawled in my arms for a week straight, the same girl who had searched for comfort in me, and now it just felt wrong for there to be no communication between the two of us.
I had tried so hard to shake the worry, telling myself she would reply sooner or later, that maybe she just had her phone taken off of her, but as my thoughts spiralled further all I seemed to be able to do was blame myself - maybe I was the problem. Was I being too needy, asking too much of her? I just wanted to keep her safe. Was she sick of me? Did she just not want to talk to me?
A small tear ran down my cheek which I quickly wiped with the sleeve of my hoodie before reaching my arm out to my nightstand, grabbing my phone off of it and sitting myself up in bed. I clicked on the screen, opening the phone to the lock screen. I had my phone wallpaper set to a slideshow of different photos - the picture changing each time I opened my phone, on my lock screen this time was a picture of me and Alana, the young girl was lay with her head on my chest, sticking her tongue out at the camera as I looked at her and laughed. I loved that photo, it was easily now one of my favourite photos in my camera roll.
I smiled at the lock screen before placing my thumb down and unlocking my phone, clicking onto Instagram and finding Alana's account, which wasn't a very hard task as I found myself looking at her account multiple times a day to see if she posts anything new, just to see if she was okay. I went into her following and scrolled to the bottom, finding the account I was searching for; Ethan's.
I did a quick look through the photos he had posted on there, nothing too exciting, just pictures of him and his friends. I then opened a DM between the two of us and spent a while just staring at my keyboard, trying to decide if what I was doing was stupid, making myself believe I was annoying even just for being worried about her.
★
I spent a long while going back and forth with myself about if reaching out to Ethan was worth it, if it was going too far, but I had a meeting at 9 am, and I thought that sending the message would hopefully calm some anxiety so I could actually get some sleep before having to get up and get ready, so I took my time to write a good message, one that doesn't come across too strong and show all my anxiety as I was definitely overthinking it and I didn't want to annoy the boy more than I knew I already was. In the end I wrote a message I found somewhat suitable to send to Ethan, rereading it one more time before hitting send;
YOU ARE READING
𝚜𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 * . °•★
FanfictionAlana Brookes is a 13 year old girl who's been in the foster care system for 8 years. She had a single mother who tragically died in a car crash. As Alana has grown up, her mental health had hit rock bottom, leaving the girl covered in scars and pra...