MC Devil Dogs #4 Which One Should I Love?

Where is Tank?

Penny

     I expected to see Tank come in this morning.  It is now lunch time and still no word.  I am beginning to worry now.  I had asked Brick a few times if he had heard from him.  No one has heard a word since Cherise saw him at the bar last night.  I had Brick run to the house and he came back with no hint of where he was.  He called the Prez and he hadn't seen him.  I am really starting to get concerned.  I mean I saw how he was last night.  Maybe he got tired of all this and ran off.  Brick has reassured me that is not the case.  I am holding Maverick and staring down into his eyes.  I am feeling really sad today.  It hit me how my mom will never see him.  Cherise walks into the room and comes over wanting my baby.  I reluctantly hand him over to her.  She will make a great Aunt.  Cherise is baby talking him and I can't help but laugh at her.  Brick stepped out earlier to make some calls.  Everyone is now looking for Tank.  I am trying to not worry but I am starting to really stress out now.  I know Tank he wouldn't leave without atleast telling Brick.  I can't get up and go look for him myself so when Brick comes back in I will make him go look for  him.

Brick

     I have been making calls trying to find Tank and I have Prez checking too.  He is able to get more information than me.  I have step outside of the hospital to make more calls.  I go to call my friend at the club in the next county to see if they may have seen him.  He would sometimes ride over there to hang with them.  Prez calls me before I can make the call.  He lets me know that a friend from the police station let him know that Tank was arrested last night for assault.  That does not sound like Tank at all.  I mean yeah he fights sometimes but only when there is no choice.  I told Prez that I would head over to the station as soon as I let Penny know.  I ran back upstairs and filled her in on what was happening.  Cherise reassured me she would stay with Penny until I got back.  I took off to go bail out my brother and find out what the hell is going on. 

     I am at the desk of Rome who is a friend of Prez.  He tells me that Tank hit an old man at the grocery store last night.  I am shocked.  There is no way he would do that.  I pay the bail money and wait for them to bring him out.  I see Tank and he just looks lost.  I walk over to him and give him a fist bump.  I will wait until we are outside before I ask what the actual fuck is going on.  They give him back all his belongings and we head out.  As soon as we are outside I turn and ask him what happened.  He just looks at me and tells me just leave it alone.  I give him a ride to pick up his bike.  He told me he was going home to shower and change then head to see Penny.  I head back to the hospital to sit with Penny so Cherise can leave.  I tell Cherise outside the door what I found out.  She tells me she will stop by and check on him for me.  I hope he will talk to her.  I feel like he needs to tell someone.  I also called Prez and informed him what I found out so far.  He will be checking into it too.  He also agreed that this is not Tank at all.  I am worried about my brother.  I go in and get little Maverick from Penny so she can rest for a bit.  I reassured her that Tank would be over in a bit.  She laid back and closed her eyes.  She is exhausted there is no doubt but I also know she has been worried about him. 

Tank

     I had me a shower now I am making me a sandwich.  I really hate that son of a bitch.  I know I should have just walked away but I didn't.  I stood there while the police asked questions and my own mother said I hit her husband for no reason.  She heard what the bastard said.  She knows how he treated me at home.  I will never stop and speak to that woman ever again.  I didn't think I could hate her anymore than I already do but I was wrong.  I hear a knock on the door and yell come in.  I see Cherise walking toward me.  She has that look in her eyes and I know she will not let this go.  I sigh and sit down to eat my food before I get my lecture.  Cherise asked "Tell me Tank what's going on?  This is not you."  I look up at her and really just want to tell her to mind her own business.  I know Cherise means well and that she loves me but sometimes I just wish everyone would leave me alone.  Maybe being a good guy is really starting to fucking suck.  I have always tried to do right by others yet I still get shit on.  I know Penny will chose Brick and I thought I could handle it but now I am not so sure.  I ate the rest of my sandwich.  Cherise gives me that look like your school teacher might give you when you didn't do what you was told.  I hear another knock on the door.  What the fuck is this?  I see Prez, Blade and Razor all come in.  Shit things just got serious for me.  They all come in and join us at the table.  Prez states "Tank I want to know what is going on with you?  I know you don't like to talk and I know you rather handle things on your own but you have a family man.  You have a family that cares for you."  Do not cry, do not cry in front of them. 

     I look up at them and see true concern.  I am going crazy keeping all this shit inside me.  I look at Prez and began with telling him what was going with Penny.  I told him how I love her but so does Brick.  I let him know that I know she loves Brick just a little bit more than me so I am going to step back.  I explained how I accepted it yesterday and was in a bad mood.  I gave them the run down of the grocery store incident.  I told them about seeing my mother and how my step father ran his mouth.  I told them I punched him and my mother told the cops I hit him without any provocation.  I see Prez give me a look.  I know that look.  Prez tells me to give him my step father's name.  He got up and told me to go see Penny so she doesn't worry.  He then told me he would handle my step father.  They all leave and I head out to go to the hospital.  Today I will let Penny know she doesn't need to stress about chosing one of us. 

Penny

     I have been waiting for couple hours for that door to open and Tank to come in.  I will feel better once I see him.  I was breastfeeding Maverick when the door opened and I saw Tank standing there.  I felt so relieved.  Tank walked over and I reached up for him.  He leaned over and hugged me.  He kissed my forehead then kissed Maverick's head.  I asked him "Tank are you okay?"  Tank gave me a small smile.  He then answered "Yes Penny sorry about that.  Just had a run-in with my stepfather.  I am sorry girl to make you worry."  I can see something else is wrong but decide to wait.  Brick comes in and I can see his relief at seeing Tank.  They talked for a bit then the nurse came and took Maverick to the nursery for a bit.  I then looked at Tank and asked "Tank what's wrong?  Please tell me please."  Tank looked at me with sadness in his eyes then said "Penny honey I love you and I know you love me too but I also know you love Brick just a little bit more.  I have decided to take a step back.  I will always be here for you and Maverick but I need to distance myself for just a bit.  I promise you though that it won't be for long.  I just need to get my head straight.  Brick is a really good man.  He has saved me when I had no one.  I am happy for you both but at the same time I feel alone.  I just never realized how much I wanted to be a part of a real family of my own.  You are the very first woman I have ever loved and I thank you for that.  You made this old boy realize that there is more to life than just sex and partying.    I want to find a woman for myself and come home to see her cooking in the kitchen just like you.  I want to find a woman to sit on the couch with to laugh at stupid shows.  I want to find a woman to go grocery shopping with and fuss about what's for dinner.  I am tired of being alone.  You have made me realize that.  I know you love me Penny and I thank you for that.  Just know that I am not mad it's just I am a little sad.  Brick you know I love you man and if you fuck this up then just now I will come get my woman."  He then laughed.  I started crying because I do love Tank I do.  However I do feel more of a pull with Brick.  I just hate that I am hurting this wonderful man.  Tank walks over and holds me while I cry.  Brick walks out to give us a few minutes. 

     I apologize to Tank.  I let him now I never meant to hurt him.  He reassured me that he understood and he doesn't hold anything against me.  He told me he knew the odds when he started having feelings for me.  Tank then walked out and Brick came back in ten minutes later.  Brick walked over to me then laid down beside me.  I cried into his chest while he reassured me everything would be okay.  I just don't want anything to happen between them.  I do love Brick and I want to be with him but I also love Tank.  I know Brick has more of a hold on my heart though than Tank.  I hate it but it's true.  Brick kisses my lips and tells me we will take it slow.  He explained to me that Tank is going to take off for a while.  I cried harder at that.  He told me Prez gave him some work out of town that needs to be done.  I dozed off in Brick's arms.  I was feeling happy but sad too.  I love this man beside me but my heart breaks for the man who left earlier.