Newly Broke Heroine!

Ch. 4: Fiona The Dragon (S)layer

"No way! That guy folded that easily?!" Bonnie exclaimed, and leaned in. It was evening now, and Gregory, Bonnie, and Fiona were seated at a private table at McFly's diner, which had the best food on this side of the city. The place was bustling, even for a weeknight. Commoners and nobles alike dined here, and the warm red-painted walls and bright white floors of the diner gave a sense of something modern. Chestnut colored wooden tables and comfy booth seats were plentiful, and arcane wisp lights illuminated the eatery in a low golden ambiance.

Fiona had come across the place early after her arrival to Fiefdala as a cheap place to eat, and became a repeat customer. The owner was a stern-faced, barrel-chested, blue scaled and muscular lizardman named Jarl, who always seemed to crack a smile when she walked in the door. He smiled for no one else except his wife, who worked in the back. The first thing he'd done was offer them appetizers for free, but Fiona smiled and said they had to play it fair. She couldn't help but notice her portion of loaded tubers was a bit bigger than the others, though.

Bonnie was dressed in a low-cut dress that matched her orange fur, her hair was tied back with a scrunchie, and was looking as cute as ever. She tried not to laugh as Fiona described the events leading up to beating the stuffing out of Doug, the dragon lord. Greg was there in a casual long-sleeved tunic and slacks, sipping on a spritzy drink that the air elemental at the counter made. She'd had that one of those drinks before, and it reminded her of root beer, but with a bit more bitter after-flavor. Greg gave her his look of disdain when she stole his drink for a sip, and included a slight crease of his brow and tightening of his jaw.

"Fiona, it's like you never stop eating. Or stealing my food," he stated flatly. She smiled at him and leaned in.

"It tastes better if it's stolen, Greg. You'll learn eventually. Anyway, so there I was, surrounded by the dragon lord's armies! Nick, Cita and I had a plan all figured out, but he somehow knew we were coming." She waved around the table for emphasis, with Bonnie listening attentively, ears tensed and elbows propping her chin up. "So, I used my mighty morphing weapon, and turned it into a staff. Those kobolds were just, oh my goodness, adorable. Like little lizard plushies! I mean yeah, they were trying to kill me or set me on fire, but I was like, nah, these guys just need a good beating! So I went bam, wham, shazam!"

Fiona pounded the table for emphasis, grinning from ear to pointy ear, and a fry dislodged from Greg's hand when the table shook. He looked unhappily at the sauce now on his hand. "So we cleared them out, no problem. Nick set up an alchemical bomb to blow up the foundries where they were making weapons, Cita went and looted all the loot–because, you know, her job is loot ninja–and then I went solo to take on the dragon. He was this lanky-looking dude with polished black hair and a pretty boy face, and he started stammering that I was disrupting all his plans, and all he wanted was his land back. He started monologuing!" Fiona declared, fists clenched around a helpless fry that became paste.

"No, he did not!" Bonnie said with a shake of her head, and leaned in even further.

"Yep, he went into a full meltdown mode, blubbering and raging! He was off his game. He came at me with this big old scepter of his, screaming that this was his birthright! So I just beat him six ways to Moonday. I love weapons that can be set to 'humiliate' rather than harming," she added with an evil smile.

"Dearie, I think you have a mean streak," Bonnie said while giggling.

"Nonsense! I held back a bit! I betcha no one ever saw an elf lugging around a giant maul. I got that morphic weapon as a gift from saving the Duke of Bahn two months ago, on a little side gig I did. I mean, how could I resist? I got my Bahn hammer!" she said while leaning back and looking proud.