Zodiacs on Crack

Leo Vs 11 Motherfuckers

As soon as the zodiac signs got back, they either fell asleep or watched anime.

"Ok So We've got 1, 2...Wait 11?" said Capricorn

"Huh" said Aries

"Check aga-Wait it is 11" said Aquarius

Scorpioo saw a note on a basket and gave i a bombastic side eye. She knew something was fishy.

"It's my wifey" said Leo

Everyone turned to see the note.

Dear 11 motherfuckers,

You might already know who it is because of how sexy my handwriting is, so you might as well find me. Since you all love to run around I planned something dangerous for the 11 of you. You will definately need those 11 nerf guns. It's me vs all of you anyways thots I'll make it easy for you as well, I'll only have 12 bullets in my gun but you all can have as many as you want.
Good luck and I'll be waiting UwU
~ King sexy
P.S. Those nerf guns are in this basket

"Is it bad that I think I know who this is?" asked Cancer 

"Only he would do this shit" said Capricorn

"He didn't even spell definitely right" said Aquarius

"Ok grammar na-"

"I will violate you in 666 ways" said 

"Bleh, we're gonna win obviously with the coolest most athletic motherfucker here...ME!" said Sagittarius

"I'm the leader of the zodiac signs!" argued Aries

"NO ME"

"NO ME"

"FITE ME!"

"Sag is weak and he knows it" chuckled Gemini

Sagittarius glared at him and grabbed him by his shirt and lifted him up.

"What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Qaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire Australia armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across Australia and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, cunt. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Aussie Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo" said Sagittarius

Everyone stared at him after he finished his copypasta ass speech.

"Fuck you Bianca" said Sagittarius

I did nothing wrong! Anyways, after Sagittarius roasted my cutiepie self out of nowhere, Libra tried to pull them away.

"Okay ladies chill out" said Libra