Philophobic : Tyler Galpin

12: Anti-Heartbreaker

Monday, October 22nd

[victoria's pov]

"I was so glad when Wednesday told me you were alright," Enid said, walking me to the music room, arm-in-arm. "It's horrifying but... you're so brave! I hope you don't mind that I wrote about it in my blog."

My eyes widened. "You what?"

"Please don't be mad," Enid pipped. "I didn't write it just because it's a good story, but because I'm so proud of you! Nevermore is blessed to have such a hero, it's probably one of the most heroic things that've happened in this small-ass town."

I couldn't help but feel flustered by this information. Me? A hero?

"More like an anti-hero," I said sheepishly. "It was just a survival mode. Anyone would do the same."

"So noble as always, my dear," Enid said proudly and patted my head like an owner would to its puppy.

But I knew it was a playful manner and grinned. "Jeez, Enid, maybe you'll be joining me on national news station interviews soon."

Enid and I laughed as the bell rang.

"Well, that's my cue," Enid frowned. "Thornhill might just strangle me if I'm late again."

"Has your attendance been that bad?"

"No," Enid said with a tight smile, which was the particular smile she had when she was lying.

"I want answers as soon as possible," I demanded. "But for now, get to class—before Thornhill chains you up in her classroom."

Enid smiled and ran off with a wave as I entered the music room.

Empty once again. Perfect.

I set down my case and picked up my bow and resin. As I scratched the surface of my resin, I recalled Tyler and my interaction in his car.

First, his words had gotten to me and now the briefest second of his touch? I couldn't believe something like this was taking over my thoughts, it'd been irking me all morning.

I noticed I'd carved down too much of my resin and blew away the dust as it disappeared out of the light of the windows and into the shadows.

Picking up my bow and violin, I decided to begin with a few warm ups.

Love in the Dark by Adele would be a good practice. After all, it's what I was supposed to play in my upcoming concert.

My mind kept wandering to the lyrics of the song. It was almost easier to remember the notes of a song when there were lyrics.

And not even halfway through the song, my shoulder began to cramp.

I ignored the buzz and tried to keep my posture as I replayed where I'd stuttered. But it only got worse from there as I paused and tried to stretch my bandaged right shoulder.

Picking up my bow again, I started a brief legato tune before messing around with staccato. Yet as I began to try the graceful tune again, my right arm felt a limpness.

It hurts to play.

And it hurt me even more to not play.

I set down my violin and bow, deciding that maybe the best warm up was to stretch my shoulder...

But in the middle of it, someone entered the room. I turned around and saw Rowan entering the room shyly.

"I knew you were in here as soon as I heard the violin," Rowan smiled.

"Plenty of other students play violin," I said as I began packing up, my body admitting defeat.

Rowan nodded and said, "Yes, but your style has always been different... And I figured your shoulder must be in pain from last night which is why it sounded off."

"My shoulder's fine," I said, sitting on the piano bench as I buckled my case. "But show's over. How's your head? Remember much from last night?"

"Actually I came to talk to you about just that," Rowan said, nearing me. "I wanted to say thank you for saving me."

I felt an awkwardness grow between us. Sure, he sounded genuine but the praise was a little more than what I was used to. And I had a gut feeling this was leading somewhere.

"You're welcome," I said as he stood before me.

He smiled and nervously placed his hands in his pocket while he looked at his shoes. "Listen, uh..."

"Shit," I thought. "Please don't go to where I think this is going..."

"I like you," Rowan admitted, his eyes meeting mine as he smiled with a relieved breath. "I have for a while now."

I must've looked stupid, sitting there with my mouth agape with an unsureness as to how to respond...

But I somehow felt like I was fucked.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" he asked.

Rowan and I? Now that I was hearing it from someone's words except for Enid and my own thoughts, it didn't feel right.

But I did feel guilty.

"Rowan..." I began. "Listen, I'm flattered,"—a lie—"but I don't think I can handle a relationship right now."—not a lie.

He looked a little discouraged, but didn't accept my answer right away.

"But you should give me a chance," Rowan blurted. "Us a chance. I mean, I won't be a burden."

"It has nothing to do with you, Rowan," I reassured. "Dating is just the last thing on my mind right now."

He was sort of in disbelief, his posture now sulking more. "But what about that normie?"

"Who- Tyler?" I asked. "What does this have to do with him?"

"Forget it," Rowan snapped. "I don't need your answer right now. Just think about it at least."

"I've made up my mind..."

He gritted his teeth from behind his lips and backed away, looking at me with great disappointment as if I'd lead him on. Without another word, he turned his back and shuffled away from the door.

I felt bad, but not regretful. This day couldn't get any worse.

I couldn't have possibly broken his heart. Even if I did, that'd only make me no more than an anti-heartbreaker.

As I left the music room, I saw Eugene and caught up with him. He seemed to be distracted and had continued on without paying me any attention.

"Eugene!" I exclaimed, grabbing his shoulder.

"What?" he demanded.

"Jeez, what's wrong?" I asked.

"You bailed on me again is what's wrong! To go play superhero!"

"I didn't mean to-"

"Yes, you did," he snapped. "And bees are supposed to support the hive. You haven't been a great bee, or a great bee-mom, or a great friend!"

I frowned. "I'm so sorry, Eugene-"

"No," he snapped. "I get it. You're too cool to be a part of the club now. You're off to do greater things than protect stupid little bee lives."

I couldn't say anything further as he turned his heel and walked away. I'd never seen Eugene so frustrated, and I couldn't help but know I was in the wrong...

The day could get worse.

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