Damsel in Delusion

The Letters!

Shivaay's POV

I drove back to home and on the way I was only thinking about those letters and diaries ..... what she has written?
What does she think of me ?
Why I didn't valued her?
Why I was the one to hurt her?
Why did she loved me so much?
And lot more questions aroused.

Finally , after the dinner I am in my room.
The first thing I do as soon as I enter my room is , checking my PC .... whether it has some updates or not and then I just get lost in the gaming world ..... sometimes PS is also my next distraction.

But today something wasn't the same, I entered my room with 5 diaries and some loose papers in my hands....I looked at the PC , I looked at PS but I don't know why I effortlessly ignored both of them and simply got seated on my bed.

With ample of questions I picked up one of her diary and started reading it ,
"1..2..3..breathe"

Letter 1

Dear God,

I know , it's all your plan ...but it's hurting me a Lil too much ... please ease the pain . I don't want to leave him but things aren't going well between us....help us to fix things . I can't handle it anymore.... everything is falling apart and the worst part is no one cares ...but my only safe place also doesn't care...that hurts me ....and I don't want to create problems in his life but I think unknowingly I have spoiled a beautiful bond .....and I don't want to get punished anymore ...if it's my mistake then please forgive me and help us get back to eachother and if it's his fault then also forgive us .
I trust your plans.
With love
Gauri:)

She wrote it literally to God, I have no words this girl is crazy , naive , goddamn faithful and she is just incredible.....and what I did!? Pushed her away from me!?
I realised my mistake and I am not going to repeat it.

Letter 2
Dear God,
Life has been heavy lately, coz I am Missing him as I had an argument with my whole family and now I am missing him too much.....how much I need to go through it all ...alone....I am tired of this.
Please ask him to come back to me and be with me. I know there's a lot of difference in our personalities,
he is cool , I am impatient
He is organised, I am clumsy
He is intelligent, I am average student
He is mature, I am childish ..or naive
He is calm , I am short tempered
He doesn't express , but he's emotional, I have subtitles for every emotion.

I know we are opposite but you know opposite attracts.....so it just works that way....and I trust you, you are going to make things work out for us . I know he deserves better but I don't want to lose him so make me 'the better' for him.
And also give him wisdom to know .
I trust your timing
With love
Gauri:)

Letter 3
Dear God,
I am so happy today because I finally scored well in my finals and I am feeling so much better after a long time...coz it's I got my academic validation. But one thing is still missing that's ...I want to share it with him....I want to share everything with him the ups the downs the best the worst everything means everything. And also I want to know about him. I know earlier I didn't gave attention to his side of story but now I won't repeat it when you will help us to reconcile....it's a promise. And it's just a phase ....this too shall pass.

With love
Gauri:)

I thought there's no such thing like pure love ....but I guess I was totally wrong with it. When we weren't in contact then also she never lost the one ....she kept writing it to God . I can't believe!

Letter 4

Dear God,
You know what I just had a dream about him, he texted me 7+ new messages but didn't see anything except for, 'talk to me , now'
I don't know if it's a sign or what. But I really felt it deeply, no worries I am not calling him .....just ranting in my diary coz my human diary isn't with me and I can't replace my human diary with anyone except God. Anyways keep coming in dreams to show me that it's meant to be. And also I pray every other girl of his neighbourhood, university, school  or any girl doesn't have a crush on him and if she has ...he shouldn't have...ever ...and make all those girls tie him rakhi ... please god....I know I'm sounding too childish but that's what I want.....all the girls except me should be his sister.

"Ohh ..myy..godd ..it's hilarious." I chuckled.
"How innocent of her , asking God to make all the girls my sisters. Only she can pray like that....just her thing. "

Letter 5

Dear God,
You can take your time but please don't make us part our ways... it's ok I will handle the waiting phase but not separation....I want to spend all of my life with him....and only him. I am not being stubborn but that's my dream if you find it fruitful...I will more than just happy and grateful and if not him , then also give me strength to accept your plans. But I see forever in his eyes.
I respect him , I love him , I am grateful for him ......and I have faith that at the right time we will be united and I don't expect all these things from him ...but I trust you....coz you are greater than him or me ....so I unfurled my intentions to you and now it's up to you..... thank you and I trust you and your timing.
With love
Gauri:)

I am speechless......I haven't seen anything like that except in movies....but she is not fictional, she is real with fictional traits.....I will always be blessed to receive love from such a pious soul ....... After looking at some of these letters I am sure , she is the only one.....and even after this I continued ignoring her then Sidya won't be wrong if she called me 'jerk'.

Wait a minute .... what's this page
' Wishlists'

Oops .... it's 4 .....I didn't realised it's 4 in the morning.

I placed all 'my' diaries in my bag ....and will ask Sidya for one more day to keep my treasure with me, just for a day.

Stay tuned , for the wishlists!
Hope you enjoyed!