String to my heart ♪ Mark Lee

♪ 42

I don't want to walk in this maze
Not that I know everything but
Just as I want it, say it, say it back
Oh, say it ditto
I want you so, want you, so say it ditto

♪

Hannah and Renjun sat together in a quiet corner of the dorm room, sipping on warm tea while the others were still caught up in concert preparations at the company.

Renjun taking a much-needed break from the hectic schedule seemed more at ease. His usual sharp energy was softened, though a little worn from the demands of being on tour.

"So" Hannah began, setting her cup down and leaning back.
"how are you holding up?"

Renjun smiled faintly, his eyes tired but sincere.
"It's been alright. You know how it gets, especially after the back to back shows. But it's good to finally have a moment to breathe."

Hannah nodded, sensing the weight behind his words. There was something about his tone that made her wonder.
"You know you've been doing a lot. Do you ever feel like… I don’t know like it’s too much sometimes?"

He hesitated, his fingers tapping lightly against his cup.
"Sometimes yeah. But you push through because you don’t really have a choice."

She studied him for a moment before her curiosity got the best of her.
"Do you mind me asking... have you ever thought about therapy? Or have you done it before?"

Renjun blinked, surprised by the question. His gaze dropped to the floor for a second, as if weighing his words.
"Actually," he started slowly.

"I did. I took some time off a while back and went for art therapy. At first, it felt a bit weird like I wasn’t sure if it’d help. But it did more than I expected."

Hannah’s eyebrows lifted, clearly interested.
"That sounds… really cool. How did it help?"

Renjun shifted, sitting up a little straighter as he thought about it.
"It’s hard to explain, but it’s different from talking. It felt like through painting and drawing, I was able to express things that I didn’t even know were bothering me. Like stuff that words couldn’t capture. The therapist there, she was really patient. And the space... it was calming."

Hannah leaned forward, intrigued.
"Did you go back recently?"

"Yeah," Renjun admitted, his voice softening as he recalled his recent sessions.
"I felt like I needed it again. The same place, the same people. They were really good, you know? They don’t rush you to feel better or to talk about things you’re not ready to. And I guess I didn’t realize how much I was holding in until I was there again with a brush in my hand."

As he spoke, Renjun’s voice cracked slightly, his emotions catching up with him. His eyes glistened, and he quickly wiped at them.

Hannah noticed but didn’t say anything, letting him continue at his own pace.

"I got pretty emotional a few times," he admitted quietly, his gaze dropping again.
"It’s hard to explain to people who don’t know what it’s like. You’re always expected to be on, to smile, to keep going no matter how you feel inside. But there…"

He paused, taking a deep breath as his eyes welled up again, a tear slipping down his cheek.

"I could let it out" he whispered, his voice trembling slightly.
"It’s like… I finally allowed myself to feel the weight of everything, you know?"

Hannah’s expression softened as she absorbed his words. She reached out, gently resting a hand on his arm.

"That sounds really healing," she said quietly.
"I’m glad you have a place like that Renjun. It’s hard to find somewhere that feels safe enough to just be yourself without the pressure."