Fly Before You Fall

The Call

"Aimee." A small voice whispered.

It was times like this Amelia liked to disappear into her mind.

And in her mind, her dad was driving the beaten up old red pick up truck he kept in the back of their garage.

Grandmother Shannon had always hated it.

But Amelia's father had always been adamant and stubborn about keeping it. It was the first thing he ever worked for and bought on his own.

Sometimes Amelia thought they were the dirty old truck.
Her, Tina and BB.

The very unappealing creatures Grandma Gladys had probably sneered at countless of times. The creatures Amelia's father had fought to keep in his life.

The creatures she only chose to tolerate because her son was so fond of them.

"Aimee?"

Amelia turned around and saw BB peeking at her through her bedroom door.

She hadn't even noticed her open it.

She forced herself up in bed.

"Hey B." She forced her tone to be upbeat.

Bianca looked at her older sister and Amelia could see that she wasn't buying any of it.

Sometimes she forgot just how much older BB was getting.

Just how much she couldn't shield her from life anymore.

"Are you okay?" BB whispered.

The words felt like a blow to Amelia.

She fought the tears in her eyes. She couldn't remember the last time someone had asked her that and actually seemed interested in the answer.

"Come here." Amelia whispered holding out her hands.

BB wasted no time in rushing up to her and climbing on her bed.

Amelia wrapped her arms around her little sister noting just how much bigger she was. Not the same little girl she could hide with in her closet when their mother would be drunk out of her mind back on the Cut.

"Mum was really mean to you." BB spoke in a whisper. "I don't think she meant the things she said... she was just... scared."

Amelia was quiet for a second, stroking BB's cornrows.

She didn't know how to respond to that. How to explain to BB that her mum had always been a complicated person.

But even that didn't excuse the way her words stung Amelia on so many occasions.

Bianca let out a breath. "Is it true? That you were with JJ and your old friends?"

Amelia sometimes forgot that BB knew the Pogues. John B adored her and she used to hang out with Pope all the time when they would stay over.

"Yeah, B, just for a little while though."

BB was quiet for some time. "Do you miss it there sometimes?"

Amelia stopped stroking Bianca's hair for a bit.

Living on the Cut was never knowing when a decent meal would reach their table. Never knowing if their mother would come home and if she did, would she be sober?

Living on the Cut was making excuses at school because Amelia didn't know how to explain to her teachers that she had to skip so many days because BB was sick and she's the only one who could stay home and take care of her.

But then there was the fact that Pope was there to help bring in soups and food from his house. There was John B who once gathered all his money to help Amelia buy medicine for BB. There was Kie who would come over everyday after school and take over looking after BB so that Amelia could sleep.