Bucky's Anchor

Chapter 21 - A Glimmer of Hope

The rest of the day felt like a whirlwind. Bucky had asked me out. I still couldn't quite wrap my head around it. I found myself replaying our conversation over and over in my mind, feeling a strange blend of excitement and nervousness every time. Was this really happening?

As the sun began to set, I found Bucky sitting on the back steps of the safe house. He was staring out into the trees, lost in thought. His posture was tense, like he was bracing for something. I stood in the doorway for a moment, watching him, before finally stepping outside.

"Hey," I said softly, trying not to startle him.

He turned, and when he saw me, his expression softened. "Hey," he replied, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

I sat down beside him, the wooden steps creaking slightly under my weight. For a moment, we just sat there in silence, watching as the sky turned shades of orange and pink. It was a peaceful evening, a rare moment of quiet that felt almost out of place given everything that was happening around us.

"So," I started, glancing at him out of the corner of my eye. "Did you still want to... you know, have that dinner? Just the two of us?"

Bucky looked at me, his expression serious for a moment, and then he nodded. "Yeah," he said quietly. "I'd like that."

"Okay," I replied, a nervous flutter in my stomach. "Then we should probably eat before it gets too dark." I tried to keep my tone light, but I couldn't help the way my heart raced just at the thought of having this time with him.

Bucky nodded again, standing up and offering me his hand. I took it, feeling the strength and warmth in his grip as he helped me up. We moved quietly into the small kitchen, and I started pulling together what little food supplies we had. It wasn't much—just some canned soup, a loaf of bread, and a couple of apples.

"It's not exactly a five-star meal," I said, trying to make light of the situation as I set the items on the counter.

Bucky shrugged, a hint of a smile on his face. "It's perfect," he said. "It's not about the food."

I glanced at him, catching his eye for a brief moment before looking away, feeling my cheeks warm. There was something in the way he looked at me that made my chest feel tight and my heart race. It was a look that spoke of a depth of feeling that I was only beginning to understand.

"Alright," I said, clearing my throat. "Why don't you take this outside? I'll bring the soup out when it's ready."

He nodded, grabbing the bread and the apples, and heading out to the backyard. I watched him go, feeling a strange mix of nerves and excitement. This was new territory for both of us. Bucky was usually so guarded, so focused on the task at hand. But tonight, it was just us.

I busied myself with heating the soup on the small stove, my mind racing with thoughts of how the evening would go. Would it be awkward? Would we have anything to talk about? Or would it be as easy and comfortable as it had started to feel between us?

When the soup was finally warm enough, I poured it into two bowls and carried them outside. Bucky had set up a small space in the backyard, using a couple of old crates as makeshift seats and a larger one as a table. He'd even managed to find a candle somewhere and placed it in the center, the flame flickering softly in the dusk.

"Wow," I said as I set the bowls down. "You really went all out."

He shrugged, looking a bit embarrassed. "I thought it might be nice," he muttered. "You know, to make it... special."

I felt a warmth spread through me at his words. He was trying so hard, and it meant more to me than I could put into words. "It is nice," I said softly. "Thank you."

We sat down, and for a moment, we just ate in silence. The soup was simple but warm, and it felt comforting in a way I hadn't expected. It was like a small piece of normalcy in a world that had been anything but.

"So," Bucky said after a while, breaking the silence. "Steve told me people don't really say 'go steady' anymore."

I couldn't help but laugh at that, the sound surprising even me. It felt good to laugh, to have a moment of lightness in the midst of everything. "Yeah, it's a bit old-fashioned," I admitted. "But I kind of like it. It's... sweet."

Bucky looked relieved, a small smile spreading across his face. "Good," he said. "Because I wasn't sure how else to say it."

I smiled back at him, feeling a rush of affection. "You don't have to say it any other way, Bucky," I told him. "I know what you mean."

He nodded, his expression turning serious again. "I know things are complicated right now," he said slowly. "And I don't know what the future holds. But I want you to know that I... I care about you. A lot."

My heart skipped a beat at his words. I felt my breath catch in my throat, and for a moment, I couldn't find the right words to say. He was looking at me with such intensity, his eyes searching mine, as if he was trying to find answers to questions he hadn't even asked yet.

"I care about you too, Bucky," I said finally, my voice barely more than a whisper. "More than I realize, I think."

He looked down, his hands fidgeting slightly in his lap. "I just don't want to mess this up," he admitted. "I've messed up so much in my life, and I don't want this to be another thing I ruin."

I reached across the makeshift table, taking his hand in mine. "You're not going to mess this up," I said firmly. "We're both figuring this out as we go. And we'll do it together. Whatever happens, we'll face it together."

He looked at me then, really looked at me, and I could see the emotion in his eyes. It was a mixture of hope, fear, and something else—something deeper. He squeezed my hand gently, his thumb brushing over my knuckles in a way that sent a shiver down my spine.

"Together," he repeated quietly, as if he was trying to believe it. "I like the sound of that."

We sat there, holding hands across the table, the candlelight flickering between us. The world outside was still dangerous, still uncertain. But in that moment, it felt like we had carved out a small piece of sanctuary just for us.

"I know this isn't easy," I said softly. "But it's moments like this that make it worth it. Knowing that we can have something good, even when everything else is falling apart."

Bucky nodded, his eyes fixed on mine. "You make it worth it," he said, his voice low and sincere. "You make me want to keep fighting, not just for survival, but for something more."

I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes, overwhelmed by the honesty in his words. "You do the same for me," I whispered. "You remind me that there's more to life than just the battles. There's... hope."

He leaned forward slightly, his gaze intense. "Emily," he began, his voice soft. "I don't know what the future holds, but I want you to know that... whatever happens, I'm with you. Always."

I swallowed hard, my heart swelling in my chest. "I'm with you too, Bucky," I replied. "Always."

We sat there in the fading light, hands intertwined, the world around us fading away. For the first time in a long time, I felt like we were looking toward a future, not just surviving day by day. And that, in itself, was the most hopeful thing of all.