Sacrifice

Is she worth it?

After being with Stevie, Lindsey knew he had lost his mind again because of her. He was pretty sure of what he was going to do, but the time he spent with her only confirmed it, that his happiness lay with her. He came home and for a few days he kept thinking of the best way to approach Kristen. He couldn't just spit it out like it was nothing, no, they had been together for many years and it wasn't his wife's fault that all of a sudden he decided, no matter at what cost, he had to get back together with his ex, who broke up their relationship ages ago.

It was nearing dinner time and Lindsey went to see all three of his kids, spend some time with them, just talk, because he hadn't done that in too long, Fleetwood Mac occupying the majority of his time. First was Stella, who smiled at her Daddy, coming in.

"Hi, sweetie."

"Daddy? Is everything okay?"

"Yes, Stella. Just fine." Lindsey took a seat next to his youngest daughter. "What are you doing?"

"Drawing. Does this look like a horse at all?"

He nodded, leaning in to press a kiss to her hair. "It does, I knew it right away."

They talked some more and then Lindsey went to Will, who was listening to music, hitting pause when he noticed his father. 

"What are you listening to?"

"You wouldn't know them, they're not as old as you and your band are." Will joked, receiving an eye roll from Lindsey. "Sorry, couldn't resist."

After hearing about his son's girlfriend and the most recent party he went to, Lindsey knocked on Leelee's door. It took his breath away sometimes, if she was facing away from him, he could almost swear she was a young Stevie. 

"How did the race go? I'm sorry I couldn't be there."

"It's okay, Dad. And it went fine, although my biggest rival won."

He asked if she was upset about it and getting answers to a few more questions about school, Lindsey headed downstairs, where Kristen was setting up the table. The whole family gathered around it shortly and they ate, chattering away, while Lindsey mostly kept silent, doing his best to take all of it in.

The girls helped Kristen clear the plates and Lindsey asked everyone to gather in the living room. He saw worried faces staring back at him and it was breaking him apart, but he had made his decision. It hurt know, but it was going to get better. So much better, when he would be able to be seen with Stevie, hold her hand, kiss her and openly tell her he loved her. 

"I'm sorry I have to do this. I want you to know I love you all and you're all so important to me. You have changed my life completely and I couldn't imagine it without having you." He was speaking more to his kids. "But my recent health scare opened my eyes. I thought long and hard about it and I came to realize the inevitable. I hate this, I really do... I'm leaving you, Kristen. Our marriage isn't making me happy anymore and I wanted to have you guys, here with us, because I want you to know that you've done nothing wrong and things won't change. I love you the same and I'm not leaving you."

Deafening silence.

Will stood up and marched upstairs and Lindsey didn't bother with asking him to stay. He knelt in front of Stella and Leelee, who appeared to be shell shocked. "I hope you can find it in you to forgive me, but I want you to understand we'll all be a lot happier this way. We'll still see each other whenever you want, it will be, well... a lot like me leaving for tours."

Stella lunged forward, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I love you the same too, Daddy."

He smiled, kissing her cheek, then looked up again. "Lee?"

"I... I'll be okay. I think..."

"Take your sister with you, please?" Leelee nodded and took Stella by the hand, before exiting the room. 

Only then Lindsey faced Kristen, who was staring at him with wide eyes. She wasn't crying, she didn't seem about to be throwing a fit. Not yet at least... 

"Is it because of her?" She finally asked.

"It's about my personal happiness, Kristen."

"So, it's because of Stevie."

"If you think I was sleeping around with her, then no. If anything, I had my feelings bottled up, suppressed. I did my best not to let myself love her, but when the doctor told me I could die sooner rather than later... I can't waste more of my life away, Kristen."

"Where were you those couple of days ago? When you didn't come home that night?"

"I was with Stevie."

"Then what are you going on about not sleeping with her?"

"It didn't happen until now. She said she's quitting the band, then I didn't hear from her for months. I went to check on her, because she's divorcing her husband. As we were talking, he called and then she completely broke down. I comforted her, calmed her down and then..." He shrugged, looking away. "It just happened."

"Just? You don't just stick your dick into another woman, Lindsey."

"I know how having sex works, but I don't think you must know the details."

"Why her? What makes her so special?"

"She drives me crazy most of the time, but... I love her more than I can describe it in words too."

"Do you honestly believe it's worth it? She's worth it? We've been married for almost fourteen years, we have three kids together and now, after everything, you're ready to walk out on me, our family?"

Lindsey took a moment before replying, as he nodded. "Yeah, she's worth it."

"Then go. Go and be with her, but when you hit the first bump in the road, don't come crawling back, Lindsey. Have enough respect for me not to."

He was left standing alone after those words and he had to admit it, it scared him greatly, but yes, he honestly did believe that Stevie was worth it.

~

I haven't been blessed with good weather, but it gives me time to write :)