Sacrifice

What have you done?

Lindsey came home rather late the same night. Exhaling deeply, he slammed the door and tossed his car keys into a bowl on the small stand by the door. He kicked off his shoes and went looking for Stevie.

"Ste-"

"Shhhh!" She quickly shushed him and grabbed his hand, leading them to the kitchen, were they could talk. 

"What's up with you?" He frowned, looking at her confused.

Stevie crossed her arms, avoiding his eyes, as she bit on her lower lip. "Don't freak out, okay? Let me talk?"

"What have you done?" Lindsey knew to better take a seat.

"While you were out, Heather, the woman Robert cheated on me with, came to visit with their son..."

Stevie went on, telling him everything that Heather said, how sorry she was, how many times she apologized. How they approached the adoption and everything that followed, how she said she was giving away her baby and there was no question about it. Stevie particularly carefully eased Lindsey into telling him how the other woman, the reason her marriage fell apart, asked her to take care of the boy. Like promised, Lindsey listened without interrupting and when Stevie finally said everything that was to be said, she looked at him nervously as he sat completely stunned.

"You're not really asking for my opinion." He leaned back, folding his arms. "The baby is another room, you've clearly made the decision by yourself."

"I was holding him in my arms, Lindsey, his little hand gripping onto me, sleeping peacefully, looking like an angel. And Heather told me that she had no doubts, that she didn't feel anything for him, she doesn't love her own son. You never really know what kind of family adopts those children and then I started thinking about Robert and how much he wanted to be father, and there I was, with his son... I couldn't let her do it. It's not his fault, he was brought into such a fucked up situation."

Lindsey had never even dreamed about a scenario like this and here it was, his reality. He could hardly process it, he wasn't given any time to weigh the situation up and Stevie had already made the choice for them. 

"Don't you think it was selfish of you? Did you at least think of me?"

"Honestly? No, I didn't."

"You and I are in a relationship, Steph. We're together, we should make decisions together. We did that buying things for the house and now, you didn't even remember me, when deciding to adopt a baby. He's not a dog that if you get tired of him, you can give it away."

"Lindsey, I know! I get it, I understand it, but..." She sighed, pulling out a chair and sitting next to him. "You're right, I was being selfish, like I've never been before. I wasted so many chances of being a mother and this... I'm not sure I believe in God, but this boy is a gift, something I wouldn't dream of in my wildest dreams."

"How old is he? And what's his name anyway?"

"He's six weeks and he doesn't have a name. Heather was set on giving him up right from the start."

"Six weeks..." Lindsey shook his head, sighing. "He'll take up all of your time. You won't get to sleep until noon. You won't get to go out whenever you want. You won't be able to feel unwell or tired. You won't be able to just up and leave to Hawaii whenever you want. You won't be able to book studio time whenever you want. You'll have to completely dedicate yourself to that child. And after all, you are sixty six."

"Yes, yes to everything you said, I understand it all and I realize that now I will definitely have to stand by my decision quitting Fleetwood Mac or maybe music altogether, but Linds... I feel... I feel like this is right, like I'm supposed to do this, like it all happened for a reason."

"There's no changing your mind about this, is there?"

She shook her head, taking his hand in between hers. "Lindsey, I love you and I want to be with you, but if you don't think you can do this with me, raise that boy with me..." A few tears rolled down her cheeks. "Then I'm sorry, but I'll have to say goodbye to you. I'll do it by myself, it will be hard, maybe the hardest thing ever, but I will raise him."

Before he opened his mouth to say something, the baby started crying and she went to the living room, where she had him sleeping before Lindsey returned, surrounded by pillows and blankets, so he wouldn't fall. She scooped up the baby in her arms, rocking him, swaying on her feet, until he fell back to sleep and she smiled down, pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

Lindsey witnessed the moment and he was slightly taken aback by how naturally it all came to her, as if she was meant to be someone's mother. He approached them from the back, careful, not to startle and placed his arm around her waist, kissing her temple. Stevie lifted her eyes up, seeing Lindsey smiling just a little. 

"Okay."

"Yeah?" 

He nodded, now kissing her lips. "I want us to experience this together, to be parents together, because our horrible choices in the past took that away from us. Now we got another chance, I wouldn't miss it."

"Lindsey..." She whispered, her eyes welling up with tears again. "Do you mean it? Honestly? You're not just saying that? Because I have decided and I'm not changing my mind."

"I know and yes, I mean it."

She smiled brightly. "A whole new beginning for us."

"A very different and unexpected new beginning for us." Lindsey echoed, kissing her again. 

THE END

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Hopefully you liked this story, I always try to think of something different and I loved writing it. Thank you for your feedback.