Small Cuts (Supernatural Dark!fic)

n i n e t y - f i v e

"God put a smile upon your face"
God Put a Smile Upon Your Face - Coldplay

The bunker was quiet, the weight of their plans pressing down on everyone. Amara sat in her room, the soft glow of a lamp casting shadows on the walls. She leaned against the headboard, her thoughts swirling. Her mind replayed Crowley's smug grin, his sharp words, and the uneasy feeling that settled in her chest every time she thought about working with him.

She had felt this kind of darkness before with Paimon, and while the brothers assured her Crowley wasn't the same, the thought of trusting another demon—especially one as powerful as the King of Hell—made her skin crawl. But Sam and Dean trusted him. Castiel had consulted him. Could she really trust their judgment?

The quiet knock on her door made her heart jump. She knew that knock—it was softer, more measured.

"Come in, Cas," she called quietly.

The door opened, and Castiel stepped inside, his trench coat hanging loosely around him, as usual. He closed the door behind him gently, his eyes scanning the room before settling on her. There was something comforting about his presence, even when he wasn't saying anything.

"You've been quiet since Crowley arrived," Castiel said, his voice as steady as ever. "I wanted to check on you."

Amara sighed, hugging her knees to her chest. "I'm... trying to wrap my head around it. I don't know if I can trust him."

Castiel walked over to the chair by her bed and sat down, his expression thoughtful. "I understand. Crowley is not easy to trust. He's self-serving, manipulative. But he's also pragmatic. His interest in helping us is genuine, because the Primordial Entity threatens him as much as it threatens you."

Amara bit her lip, the tension still heavy on her shoulders. "I don't doubt that. But it's hard for me. He's a demon. After what I went through with Paimon... I just don't know if I can let my guard down around him."

Castiel studied her for a moment, his blue eyes thoughtful. "You were apprehensive of me once, too."

Amara blinked, surprised by the comment. "What?"

"When we first met," Castiel continued, his voice calm. "You didn't trust me. You saw me as a reminder of what you'd been through—of the divine forces that abandoned you. But now, we've built a mutual trust."

Amara looked away, feeling a twinge of guilt. It was true. When Castiel first arrived in her life, she had resented him, felt wary of him, because he represented the divine forces that had never intervened in her past. But now... now things were different.

"It's not the same, Cas," she whispered. "I know I can trust you. I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust Crowley. It's just... you've been there for me, and I know you don't have any agenda. Crowley... I can't see him the way I see you."

Castiel tilted his head slightly, intrigued by her words. "And how do you see me, Amara?"

Amara hesitated, her heart racing slightly. She hadn't put it into words before, but the truth was there, clear as day. "You're... you're the best friend I've ever had, Cas."

The words hung in the air, and for a moment, Castiel didn't respond. Amara glanced up at him, worried she had said too much, but when her eyes met his, she saw something rare—emotion. Castiel wasn't one to express feelings easily, but in that moment, his usual stoic demeanour softened. His lips curved ever so slightly, not quite a smile, but something close.

"I am... honoured to hear that," Castiel said quietly. There was a warmth in his voice that hadn't been there before. "You've come to mean a great deal to me as well, Amara."