Crimson Regret || Hawks (Keigo)

3

You raised your phone and start typing a message for him

The patrol he’s on is going on as normal, but he’s not really paying much attention to it, his mind still too distracted and focused on the upcoming thing he has to do later today. The very last thing on his mind is hoping to get a message on his phone from you. He jolts when he finally does, looking surprised when he sees your name on the screen, and instantly his heart races faster and his hands shake as he looks at the text you sent him

Yena
How's your shift going?
I hope you are not stressing yourself
Goodnight don't stay awake for too long ^-^.

12:23am

His heart warms a bit when he reads the message, and he can feel himself feeling just a bit better. Even if it’s just a simple, short, friendly text, it means a lot right now. He slowly types out a reply, debating on whether to say something more meaningful or not. In the end he decides to just respond in a simple way, still reluctant to push his luck

”Thanks. Shift is going well. I’ll be heading back in a bit. I’ll try to get some sleep. Goodnight.”

12:25am

You read the message aloud and it feels warm and fuzzy inside your heart---

You slapped your cheek for smiling like an idiot and having those thoughts. You should not fall for him again.

As soon as he presses send on the text, he’s immediately kicking himself for not saying something more meaningful or significant. He just gave a short, generic reply, and he regrets it. All he would really like to do is text you a longer, more important message and tell you everything that’s on his mind, but he’s just too afraid to.

He continues patrolling, but is still distracted by you like always. A small part of him can’t help but feel a little better after the message exchange. At least you didn’t completely ignore him.

Eventually the shift does end, and he finally gets to head back. The journey home is filled with his mind still reeling with anxiety, not looking forward to the conversation he has to have. He’s so terrified he feels nauseous, his heart’s thumping and pounding, and he feels like he can barely breathe through the nerves. He just wants it to be over already so he can get it over with, even if he doesn’t get the answer he wants

You probe yourself on your bed the blankets still underneath your body, you lay on your side and look through the window at the sky and the stars above.. they were specially brighter tonight

He finally, makes it to your place, having landed on a rooftop nearby. He takes a deep breath, and looks up at the night sky. He can’t help but notice the stars, how bright they are. It’s a bit of a nice distraction. But only for a moment.

He lands a few feet away on the ground, his heart starting to pound even harder. This is it. He’s really going to do it this time. He starts slowly walking towards your place, his heart in his throat and his hands shaking

There’s a mixture of emotions filling his head as he tries to mentally prepare himself for this. On one hand, he’s so scared of messing this up that he’s practically frozen, terrified to make the first step. His heart feels like it couldn’t possibly beat any faster than it is right now. But on the other hand, he’s also completely determined to do this. And that determination slowly pushes him forward, and he slowly reaches for the bell of your apartment

Finally he hears the sound of the door opening, and his heart stops for a moment. He instantly looks at you, trying to keep his anxiety from being too obvious on his face. He gives a forced smile, acting casual and hiding the extreme amount of stress that’s really going on under the surface.