Crossing the line

16: Back To Reality

AVA

The city hummed around me, the familiar noise of honking cars, busy sidewalks, and the distant murmur of people going about their lives. It was strange how quickly everything slipped back into routine-how the summer seemed like a distant memory already. Like it hadn't been just two days since I left Jake standing in that driveway, watching me drive away with the weight of unspoken words and too-late confessions still heavy in the air.

I sighed, adjusting the bag on my shoulder as I walked through the crowded streets. I should've been relieved to be back in my element. The city had always felt like my home, with its fast pace, the constant movement, the endless possibilities. But for the first time, it felt off. Like something was missing.

I reached my apartment building and fumbled for my keys, my thoughts still stuck on him. It was impossible not to think about Jake-about the way his voice cracked when he told me he loved me. The way he had stood there, vulnerable in a way I'd never seen him before, his heart practically in his hands.

And now I was here, back in the life I'd always known, but I couldn't stop replaying those moments. I couldn't stop thinking about everything I'd left behind. I'd spent the entire summer waiting for him, and when it finally happened, when he finally admitted how he felt, it felt like it was too late. But was it really?

I wasn't sure anymore.

Unlocking the door to my apartment, I stepped inside and dropped my keys on the kitchen counter. The place was just as I'd left it-neat, organized, everything in its place. But even that felt strange now, like it wasn't quite mine anymore. Or maybe it was me who wasn't the same.

I leaned against the counter, running a hand through my hair and closing my eyes for a moment. I'd told Jake we'd figure things out, that we'd find a way. But now that I was back, reality felt a lot more complicated. There was a part of me that wanted to call him, to hear his voice, to tell him I'd made a mistake by leaving. But the other part of me, the rational part, knew that wasn't going to solve anything.

We'd had all summer, and we hadn't been able to figure it out then. What was going to be different now?

I knew Jake. I knew he wouldn't want to put Liam in a position where things got awkward or messy. And I wasn't sure I could handle being caught in the middle of that either. Liam was my brother. Jake was his best friend. And whatever we did, it wouldn't just affect us-it would affect everyone.

I pushed myself away from the counter and walked to the window, looking out at the skyline. The sun was setting, casting the buildings in a soft, golden light. It reminded me of that last evening back at the house, the way everything felt so final. I hated that feeling, the one that made you question if you'd made the right choice, or if you'd let something slip away that you couldn't get back.

My phone buzzed on the counter, breaking through my thoughts. For a second, my heart leapt, thinking maybe it was Jake. Maybe he was reaching out, telling me he couldn't stand the silence between us. But when I glanced at the screen, it was just a message from work-something about a meeting on Monday.

Reality had a way of pulling you back when you least wanted it to.

I sighed again, picking up my phone and scrolling through the notifications. No messages from Jake. Not that I was surprised. He wasn't the type to text out of the blue. Not after everything that had happened. He probably didn't even know what to say. And honestly, neither did I.

I was back in the city, and life was supposed to move on now. Work, friends, everything that had been on pause while I spent the summer waiting for something to happen with Jake-it was all still here, waiting for me to step back into it. But the truth was, part of me didn't want to move on. Part of me wanted to go back to that moment in the driveway and ask him to come with me. To see what it would be like if we stopped waiting and just let ourselves be together.

But that wasn't how things worked. And now, standing here in my apartment, I had to face the fact that whatever Jake and I could've had...it might not happen. I wasn't sure how to feel about that. All I knew was that I missed him. More than I expected to.

I grabbed my laptop from the couch, settling down at the small table in the corner, and opened it. I had emails to catch up on, projects to plan. Work was the distraction I needed, and maybe it would help me push thoughts of Jake to the back of my mind. But as I stared at the screen, my fingers hovering over the keyboard, I realized it wasn't that simple.

I couldn't just move on. Not from him.

Not yet.

And maybe, deep down, I didn't want to.