Crossing the line

21: feelings or delusions

JAKE- Christmas before summer after Ava graduated college

The snow outside was falling thick and heavy, coating the trees and rooftops in a blanket of white. Inside, though, the warmth of the fire crackling in the hearth and the laughter filling Liam's house made it feel more like home than anywhere else ever had. I'd spent every Christmas break here for years, so I was used to the way things went-the holiday traditions, the teasing, the way Liam's mom would bake enough cookies to feed an army.

But this year, something was different.

I could feel it every time Ava walked into the room.

She was everywhere this break, always hanging around. That wasn't unusual. She'd been Liam's little shadow for as long as I could remember. But this year, it was different. I didn't know if it was her or me-or both-but I could feel a shift between us.

I'd liked Ava for years, ever since high school, but I'd gotten used to hiding it. I'd mastered the art of keeping my feelings in check, of playing the role of the supportive, slightly-overprotective friend without giving too much away. It was easier that way, safer. Especially since Liam was oblivious and Ava didn't have a clue.

Or at least, I thought she didn't.

But lately, the way she'd been looking at me was making it harder to pretend.

Like right now.

I was sitting on the couch, watching TV with Liam and a couple of his cousins. We were supposed to be watching a football game, but I wasn't paying attention. Not with Ava sitting across from me, her legs tucked underneath her, pretending to be interested in whatever book she was reading.

Every few minutes, I'd catch her glancing up at me, and when our eyes met, she'd look away quickly, like she'd been caught doing something she shouldn't. But the thing was, it wasn't the usual glance she gave me when she was teasing or annoyed with me. There was something else there now-something that made my heart race in ways it hadn't in a long time.

I couldn't let myself get too carried away with it, though. Maybe it was nothing. Maybe I was imagining things. But then again, maybe I wasn't.

Liam nudged me, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Dude, you good?"

I blinked, trying to focus. "Yeah, why?"

He smirked, throwing a handful of popcorn at me. "Because you've been staring at the wall for like five minutes. You gonna watch the game or what?"

"Right," I muttered, wiping the popcorn off my shirt and sitting up straighter. "Game. Got it."

But I couldn't concentrate. Not with Ava's occasional glances making my head spin.

The game ended, and Liam's cousins headed out to meet up with some other friends, leaving the house quieter than it had been all day. Liam headed to the kitchen, probably in search of more snacks, leaving me and Ava alone in the living room.

She hadn't said much to me all break, at least nothing out of the ordinary. But today, there was this unspoken tension in the air. I could feel it every time I looked at her, like something had shifted between us and neither of us knew how to address it.

She stood up, stretching, and walked over to the window, looking out at the snow falling outside. Her back was to me, but I could see her reflection in the glass-could see the way she hesitated for a moment before turning around to face me.

"You've been quiet lately," she said, her voice soft. "Everything okay?"

I raised an eyebrow, trying to keep my tone casual. "Yeah, why wouldn't it be?"

She shrugged, walking back over to the couch but not sitting down. She leaned against the armrest instead, her arms crossed in front of her. "I don't know. You just seem... different."

I could feel my pulse quicken. Did she notice? Did she see through the facade I'd spent years building? "I'm the same as always."

Her eyes lingered on mine for a moment longer than usual, like she was searching for something. Then, she smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "If you say so."

She turned to head toward the kitchen, but I wasn't ready for her to leave. Something in me wanted to see if I was right-if what I thought I'd been noticing was real.

"Hey, Ava," I called out before I could stop myself.

She stopped in her tracks and turned back to me, eyebrows raised. "Yeah?"

I stood up, rubbing the back of my neck, trying to think of something to say that didn't sound completely obvious. "You doing anything later? Thought maybe we could hang out. You know, just like old times."

Her expression shifted slightly-just enough for me to notice the way her cheeks flushed, the way her eyes brightened for a split second.

"Sure," she said, her voice a little softer than before. "That sounds... fun."

The way she looked at me then-like she was seeing me for the first time-made my heart pound in my chest. Maybe I wasn't imagining things. Maybe she was starting to feel something too.

But I couldn't let myself get too carried away with that thought. Not yet. So I just smiled and nodded, playing it off like it was no big deal.

"Cool. It'll be fun."

She gave me one last look before heading into the kitchen, leaving me standing there alone in the living room, my heart racing.

I sat back down on the couch, staring at the spot where she'd been just moments before. I wasn't imagining it. Something had definitely changed. The way she'd been looking at me lately-the way she'd just agreed to hang out with me-it wasn't the same as before. And for the first time in a long time, I let myself hope that maybe, just maybe, she was starting to feel the same way I did.

But I had to be careful. Liam was my best friend. Ava was his little sister. And even though there was this growing tension between us, I couldn't afford to screw things up. Not now. Not when I'd gotten so good at hiding my feelings for so long.

Still, as I sat there thinking about her, I couldn't help but feel a flicker of excitement. Something was changing. I could feel it.

And maybe this Christmas break would be the beginning of something more.