*Mikasa's POV*
I fell asleep curled up in a ball. I saw pictures of Ian smiling at me..... Ian kissing me..... Ian spinning me around as we danced under the stars......Ian pulling me out of the way of danger. I furrowed my eyebrows and stirred.
Ian showed up at the scout headquarters. We had been together for a year and 10 months....almost 2 years. He walked over to me and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the woods.
"Ian...what are you-"
"Trust me Mikasa"
I sighed and followed him. He stopped and let go of my hand. He immediately grabbed my face and kissed me softly. The kiss auickly intensified to the piont where i was pinned against a tree and i was attempting to tug his jacket off. He grabbed my hands and stopped me. I looked up at him.
"Ian...I-I'm sorry. Do you not want that?"
"Mikasa don't apologize. That's not it".
I furrowed my eyebrows.
He hesitated.
"Mikasa....when i met you, i thought i was dreaming. You were so beautiful on that day....even with tears in your eyes. And i saw how passionate you were about this all while we were fighting the titans. You are so graceful when you glide through the air. You fly like a bird and look like an angel. And i want to spend the rest of my life fighting by your side".
He pulled out a silver ring and got on one knee. I covered my face with my hands.
"Mikasa. Will you marry me?"
I nodded my head quickly and he slid the ring on my finger, kissing me passionately.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I rolled over in bed and groaned in my sleep.
"Ian...."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ian and i had been together for two years. Two years of hand holding, slow dancing, sweet kissing, titan killing, madness.
He came to see me every other day. Sometimes it was once a week. But i was happy whenever i got to see him.
And then we saw each other at most of my missions.
We were preparing to retake Wall Maria from the Titans. We were taking a huge step for humanity. This would be the first time that we have won. We gathered on top of the wall and we went over the plan with Eren. He was supposed to use his titan powers to lift the giant boulder on top of our house and use it to plug the hole in the wall. We were split up into diferent squads. One group would be protecting Eren against the other titans, another large group would enter the city if the first group was in need of help; and the remaining people would act as bait to lure the titans into the corner of the city. I was going to be in the third group, but Ian came over and grabbed my arm.
"Mikasa. You're in the group protecting Yeager".
I smiled because he was also protecting Eren. I ran over to the rest of the squad and we discussed the plan again before commensing the plan.
Ian spoke up, "okay. I was appointed field leader for this operation. You all will follow my lead. Got it?"
He looked at me out of the corner of his eye and i blushed.
"Yes sir". everyone responded at the same time. As we were waiting for our que to begin, Ian grabbed my hand.
He stroked my cheek,
"Mikasa..."
I cut him off,
"Ian I'll be fine. We'll be fine".
He smiled weakly.
"Just be careful okay?"
"Okay".
............
The mission had started and we set out for the boulder. Eren turned into the 15 meter titan and quickly lost control of his body, swinging at me. He missed, but I was thrown in the air from the force. A piece of the roof cut my cheek, leaving a gash. Everything happened so fast. Before i knew what happened, Eren was knocked out and Ian had me in his arms.
The others suggested that we fire the red flare and retreat up the wall, leaving Eren behind. I refused, of course. Ian finally convinced them to protect Eren to the death if they had to. They went off to kill the titans that were closing in on Eren. And i left Ian so i could fight.
...........
We ran on the ground to distract the titans as Eren carried the boulder towards the wall. Many people got picked up or crushed by a titan. I watched Ian pull someone out of a titan's mouth.....and then the titan pushed him into its mouth.
NO!
He looked directly into my eyes and screamed my name.
NO!!
The titan bit down on his neck, taking off his head.
Ian is..... NO!!
I froze in place and dropped to my knees.
I should have kissed him...
I should have told him i loved him...
Anything....
I said nothing. I said we would be fine. I let him down.....
The world is cruel.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
" IAN NO!! "
I woke up in a cold sweat. My eyes burned from crying and my body was shaking. I tucked my knees up to my chest and began rocking back and forth. I tangled my fingers in my hair and screamed as loud as i could into my knees. I let out a heart wrenching sob and shook violently.
I heard someone pounding on my door, before coming in. The person stopped at the doorway. They came and sat on my bed.
I looked up, expecting to see Eren, but i saw Jean instead. I tried to calm my emotions, but the longer i looked at him, the more i cried.
He hesitated and wrapped his arms around me, rubbing my back. I let him do this and i buried my face into his chest.
"He's gone....he's gone...he's gone.."
Jean shushed me quietly and stroked my hair.
"Trust me. I know how this feels. I went through the same thing with Marco. I woke up in a cold sweat screaming at the memory of his dead body for weeks. Except....nobody came to comfort me. It fucking sucks".
His eyes began to water and i stayed silent.
"It sucks because you can't see their smile or hear their laugh anymore. You can't see their face or feel their touch anymore. And you can never get them back....."
He started crying and i looked at him and wiped his tears.
He opened his eyes and just looked at me for a bit, before hugging me again.
"We'll get through it together okay?" I'll come here every night and stay with you. And if you have a nightmare, I'll fight it away. Friends?"
I looked at him and thought about how much of an ass he was to Eren before.
"Friends"
*A/N* Hello my lovelies!!! Another Mikasa chalter for you. I really hope you like this. I enjoy writing it for you :) feedback and suggestions for new stories are always welcome and appreciated. Enjoy
