overdose on love

let me help you

TW: MENTIONS OF SELF HARM

Lotties pov:

I am currently in my dorm room while Beckie is looking at my wrists and cleaning them. I have to admit this is kinda nice considering we were bitches to eachother all the time. I didnt tell her everything yesterday like how my parents are and stuff, i only told her about my sister and how she died.

"This is gonna hurt, just squeeze my hand." Beckie says as she holds one of her hands out for me to take and i do just that.

She puts some antiseptic on my wrists and i sqeeze her hand tightly as it hurt like a bitch. I shut my eyes, trying to block out the pain because, man did it hurt.

"I know im sorry." Beckie says and i just shake my head. It wasnt her fault so why is she apologising for this.

"Its not your fault." I say with my eyes still closed.

She then grabs some bandages and she starts to wrap it gently around my wrists, thats when i open my eyes to see her carefully tending to my wound. Shes being careful not to hurt me to much and i can tell. Not that i minded the pain.

"Thank you." I say which makes her look up and we hold eye contact for at least 10 seconds before i shift my gaze back onto my wound. What is this funny feeling in my stomach? What am i feeling right now?

"No need to thank me Lottie." She says softly which makes my heart grow three times bigger, like the grinch. I suppose i am like the grinch, i never smile, im always in my own space and i dont talk to many people. Now my hearts grew bigger and everyone speaks to me, well just Beckie but still its an improvement.

Once shes finished, she cleans up and puts all the bandages and things back in the first aid kit. I have no clue why she has one, maybe her parents gave her one. Speaking of her parents im supposed to be tutoring Beckie today as its Monday tomorrow, so school. I dont want to go in tomorrow, i cant be bothered seriously cant be bothered.

I go inside my bag and grab a joint while Beckie gives me a look. The look could kill 10 people and she scowled.

"Your not seriously having a joint right now Lottie." She says as she walks closer to me and i back up kinda.

"Im allowed to smoke you know." I say which is a lie but still she cant be doing things like this, she knows that it blocks all of my thoughts.

"Lottie if you dont give me the joint i will get Hallie to take it off you and trust me shes a good fighter."

I raise my eyebrows and shake my head "No, just let me smoke please." I beg and she just looks at me, rolling her eyes she leaves the dorm room. I raise my eyebrows but i go to the roof and sit on one of the chairs on there.

I light the joint and bring it to my lips, holding it in for a minute before exhaling the smoke. I still hate her, theres no way i could like her after what shes done. I take out my phone and i see i have a new message.

James:

heyy hows things with that girl you were talking about the bitchy one 😭

Me:

its going okay i guess im smoking some weed tho to take my mind off things 💪

James:

you need to stop smoking that stuff its gonna kill you earlier and how do you think that makes me feel 🙏🙏🙏

Me:

oh come on i dont smoke it that much, anyways gtg but il call you later on see how you are 😜