Why me? >Woosan<

13

It had been two days since San left the country.

Two days of scrolling. Refreshing. Reading. Hoping.

Two days of watching his phone light up with notifications that were never San's name.

Wooyoung stayed at his mom's house because it was the only place that felt even remotely safe. She made sure he ate, even when he had no appetite, and she never pushed. She simply stayed close, setting a glass of water beside him, brushing his hair back when he fell asleep on the couch, watching him with quiet concern.

But the news was everywhere.

He couldn't escape it.

Headlines. Forums. Blurry photos.

Who is the mystery man Choi San from Ateez has been seeing?
Is San from Ateez gay?
How will this affect Ateez's career?
Will Choi San leave Ateez?

Every time Wooyoung saw himself reduced to a shadow between lines of speculation, his stomach dropped. It felt like his skin was made of glass.

His friends came over. They sat with him on the couch, quiet at first, until the words finally spilled out.

They weren't angry at him. Not exactly.

More hurt than anything.

Minji's eyes shone with tears, but her voice stayed steady.

"We would've been there for you, Woo. You didn't have to do this alone."

"Have you heard from him?" she asked gently.

Wooyoung shook his head, biting down on his lip until he tasted blood.

"He doesn't even read my messages."

The tears came again, hot, exhausting, relentless.

He was so tired of crying.

They pulled him into a group hug, their warmth closing in around him.

"So," Jun said after a moment, forcing a lighter tone, "what movie are we watching?"

"A comedy," Wooyoung muttered, curling deeper into the couch and pulling a blanket around himself. "Please."

They laughed a little that night. Played games.

For a few hours, it almost felt normal.

Minho and Jun eventually fell asleep on the floor, leaving Wooyoung and Minji sitting quietly together.

"Woo," Minji whispered. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "He won't answer my texts. Or my calls. What can I do?"

She studied him carefully.

"Do you like him that much?"

Wooyoung stared down at his hands.

"I love him."

Minji went still.

"Oh."

"But I ruined everything."

His throat tightened, his vision blurring again.

"Give him time," she said softly. "I'm sure he'll call when he can."

-

Days passed.

No messages.

No calls.

Going to school felt like stepping into a spotlight. People whispered. Stared. Pointed.

"How can San be with him?"
"I didn't know he was gay."
"Why would San pick him? It's probably fake."
"He just wants attention."

The words burned.

Wooyoung stopped eating in the cafeteria. He couldn't handle the looks. Instead, he sat on the edge of the school grounds, scrolling through his phone like it was armor.

Friday came, slow and heavy.

On the way home, he opened Instagram, mindlessly scrolling, trying to numb himself.

That was when he saw it.

A link.

Shared over and over again.

San comments and apologizes for his behavior in a public apology.

His heart lurched.

For a moment he almost didn't click it.

Almost.

Then he did.

-

Hello, this is Choi San from Ateez.

With the news circulating about me right now, I wish to make a statement. The rumors are false, and I promise that I am not involved with the man in the pictures in any other way than acquaintances. I will do my best to regain your trust.

I know I have let you all down greatly, and I promise it won't happen again. Ateez and Atiny mean the world to me, and I hope my actions won't hurt my fellow members or my family. I hope to see you on our upcoming tour and that we can put this behind us.

Again, I am so sorry for disappointing you.

- Choi San

-

The words blurred.

Wooyoung's chest tightened until it felt like it was caving in. He pressed the heel of his palm against his chest, trying to breathe, but it only got worse.

The sidewalk tilted.

His phone slipped from his hands.

"Woo!"

Arms caught him before he hit the ground.

Minho.

Minho was saying something, but Wooyoung couldn't hear it over the ringing in his ears. His body shook violently.

"What the fuck," Minho muttered, scrolling through the phone. "What the actual fuck."

More voices.

Someone swearing.

Someone calling his name again and again.

"Woo," Minji said, her voice cutting through the noise, steady and calm. "You have to breathe."

"I can't," Wooyoung sobbed. "I don't... I don't know what happened. He said he loved me. He said..."

"Let's go home," she said gently.

Wooyoung nodded weakly. His legs barely worked.

Minji wrapped an arm around him, and together they got him back to the car.

-

Wooyoung didn't leave his bed for days.

Time blurred.

Food. Light. Conversation.

All of it faded.

He stared at the ceiling and tried not to think.

But he thought anyway.

How could San do this?
How could he say those things and then erase him?

Was it all a lie?

He opened San's Instagram.

A new post glowed on the screen.

San looked happy.

Was he really?

Or was it just another mask?

Wooyoung thought he knew him.

Thought he understood.

The phone died in his hands.

He didn't bother charging it.

He turned onto his side, curling in on himself, and whispered the only thing left in his chest.

"Please come back to me."