All That She Needs

Part 1 : Aiden

"Vanessa. That was her name," I said quietly, my words lost in the sounds of muffled clinking of glasses and murmurs that seem to float in the air of the bar. I was talking to Jake, a bartender I'd only met less than an hour ago. I didn't know why, maybe because of the three glasses of whiskey that were burning my stomach, or perhaps because the agony had been eating me slowly inside, but I suddenly felt a desperate need to spill my gut. To anyone who would care to listen. Perhaps a stranger would be better. Someone who wouldn't judge me. And Jake was there. It was almost as though those deep-brown eyes of his knew more than the words that rolled off my tongue, and I found myself uncharacteristically trusting him with all my secrets. "She was my assistant. The best I ever had. Sharp, efficient, she knew what I needed before I did, anticipated my moves like she could read my thoughts.

"And she was..." I drifted off, the memories with her, both precious and painful flooded my mind. I sighed heavily as a familiar twinge squeezed my chest as I thought about her. "She was beautiful," I said softly, as though speaking aloud might bring her into the space. "And she was brilliant. The type of woman who entered a room and effortlessly capture everyone's attention. Not just because she was beautiful, but she had this energy, this light, that drew people in. She loved the attention, soaking it up like it was her life force. But she never really let anyone get close. Not really."

I stopped for a moment, looking at the drink in front of me, the golden liquid catching the soft light from the ceiling. "And Vanessa was... complicated. She could make you feel like you were the most important person in the world. She would give her all to you like you were the only man she ever saw. She gave me her body, but she never gave me her heart. It was all probably just a game to her, but still, even when I knew, I couldn't stay away. I kept coming back to her."

I felt my throat tighten, the words catching there. "I noticed her like no one else did," I paused, forcing a confession that was almost too heavy to bear. My thumb traced the rim of my glass—my fourth of the night—as the memories flooded my mind. The liquid in the glass swirled slowly, reflecting the dim light, but all I could see was her.

"It was... inappropriate, the way I noticed her," I admitted, painfully. "At first, it was just admiration. Who wouldn't admire someone like her? She was confident, radiant, fearless. But then it became more. Something I couldn't control."

I glanced up at Jake, expecting judgment, but his expression was unreadable, his hands busy with a glass he was polishing, though I could tell he was listening intently. "I started looking forward to seeing her every morning," I went on, my gaze drifting back to the glass in my hand. "Her smile, her laugh. The way she'd tuck her hair behind her ear when she was deep in thought. I noticed it all. Every little detail."

"Then I found myself arriving at the office early," I said, my eyes unfocused as they stared into the rows of bottles behind Jake, almost as if I were talking to myself. "Just to catch those first few moments when she walked in, before the day really started. Her presence alone was enough to light up the entire place. She had this way of moving, so effortlessly graceful, like she was floating through life while the rest of us were just trudging along."

"I could still picture her clearly in my mind, the moments I had with her. What stuck with me most were the quieter ones—how she'd bite her lip when concentrating, the crease in her forehead when she was deep in thought. How her eyes lit up when they found me. The way she looked at me, like she was giving herself completely to me. Everything about her drew me in, and I wasn't strong enough to resist. It was more than just an attraction. It was a constant, gnawing need that took over my days and nights. It quickly became intense, turning into something so powerful that I lost control.

"I knew it was wrong," the words tumbled out as if a dam had burst inside me. "But I couldn't stop myself. She was like a fire—so intense, it was almost blinding. It fucking hurt to get close, but I kept going back. Every time, it scorched me, but I couldn't stay away. No matter how many times I told myself not to, I still returned, knowing it would destroy me. And yet, the burn felt worth it just to be near her."