All That She Needs

Part 12 : Asha

The door to my room was slightly open, letting a thin beam of light spill into the hallway. When I gently pushed it wider and walked in, I found Aiden sitting on the edge of the bed. As soon as he saw me, he rose to his feet, his expression showed that he was in great agony. I stopped in the doorway, taking in the sight of him. My husband—still so handsome, even in this moment. I took a moment to let myself appreciate the man I had adored for years, the man who had once belonged completely to me. His rugged, handsome looks, which had once given me such solace. His warm, golden eyes, that I used to lose myself in. His long, lean body, that used to keep me warm at night.

As I got nearer, I saw how disheveled he looked. His normally neat dark hair was sticking out in every direction, like he'd been nervously running his hands through it. His suit jacket and tie were thrown on the floor, and his shirt was hanging out untidily. Aiden that I knew always cared about how he looked, but tonight, that careful image was gone. It was obvious he was having a rough time, just like me—maybe even more so.

His face was shaded with exhaustion and something else. Regret, perhaps. His eyes were red, as if he'd been crying. His shoulders slumped, defeated, as though the weight of everything that had passed between us was finally pressing down on him, just as it was on me.

"You know too, don't you?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah, I know everything," I said with a heavy sigh. "At least enough to know you've been lying to me and having an affair with some slut from your office." When he gave me that painful look, like he didn't like I called her a slut, I sneered. "She was fucking someone else's husband for how many goddamn months. What else should I call her?"

"Asha," his voice shaking a little. I looked up and saw his eyes. Those warm, golden eyes looked lost and far away. There was a weakness and deep sorrow in his look, and it struck me suddenly, realizing that this was the moment that I had been dreading. He was finally being cornered and now he had no choice but to make a decision. And I knew he wouldn't choose me. Talking with Kayden had given me the strength to finally decide to leave him, and I was still determined to do that. But the possibility that he might say those words first, that he wouldn't choose me before I could reveal mine, made the pain even worse.

I braced myself for his words, feeling my legs shaking. I had to sit down, and he followed me. I was actually grateful that he sat so close that I could feel his warmth one last time, which was so stupid considering I should have punched his face instead.

"Asha, I love you," he said, his voice thick with emotion. "I've never stopped loving you. You must believe that."

The intensity of his words hit me like a physical blow. The pain in my chest was overwhelming and I felt like I was on the brink of collapse. He sounded like he was saying goodbye. I needed to respond, but the words wouldn't come. Maybe it would have been easier if he were the one ending things—at least then, I wouldn't have to muster the strength to do it myself.

"And I'm going to keep loving you until the day I die," he continued, his voice cracking with the weight of his emotion. He took my right hand and covered it with his. "Fuck, Asha. I know I've made countless mistakes. I've hurt you more than I can say. But please, sweetheart. Please forgive me. Give me another chance. I don't know if I would ever deserve your forgiveness, but I swear to you, I'll do everything, everything, to earn it."

My head snapped to his, a surge of surprise washing over me. I had braced myself for the inevitable ache, convinced that he would walk away. I never expected to find his eyes showing regret, saying that he wasn't going anywhere. Didn't he want to be with her? He was so dedicated to her, sacrificing his family just to be with her and now, when the opportunity was right there in his face, he said he wanted to stay?