33 | Alessandra

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It's cold

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It's cold. So cold.

Everything is slipping away—the light, the warmth, the memories. But one name fights its way through the darkness, tearing through the nothingness that surrounds me.

Alessandra.

Not Valentina. Not the woman she became, but Alessandra. My Alessandra. My love, my amour, my baby. The girl I destroyed to save. The girl I betrayed to protect. The girl who once stole my heart and never gave it back. The girl I would have burned the world for. The girl I still would.

I see her clearly, like I'm right there with her again. Her laughter fills my ears—soft, carefree. Her hair wild, blowing in the wind, eyes sparkling with that mischief that only she could pull off.

"Amour, come on! Don't make me wait forever," she teased, her voice light, as she always did.

My Alessandra.

It feels so real. The touch of her hand, the way she'd playfully shove me when I'd say something stupid, the sound of her laugh when she tried to act tough but couldn't hide how much she cared. We had something no one else could understand.

I'd do anything for her. 'Baby, always you,' I used to whisper when she'd ask me what I was thinking. And I meant it. I still mean it.

I see the times we spent together, hiding away from the chaos of the world. One night, we lay under the stars, her head on my chest. I remember how she felt against me, warm and soft, like she belonged there.

"What are you thinking about?" she'd ask, and I'd smile, brushing her hair out of her face. "Just you, baby. Always you."

Those were the good times—before the darkness, before everything crumbled.

I remember the way she used to tease me, that playful glint in her eyes when she'd call me out for being impossible. I'd laugh because she was the only one who could get away with it. She was everything to me. Alessandra, amour, baby.

I thought we had forever.

But forever doesn't exist, does it?

It's funny what your brain clings to when you're on the edge. You'd think it would be regrets or pain, but no—it's the good stuff. The stuff that makes your heart ache for another chance, another second. 

Back then, before everything went to hell, before betrayal, before... everything, she was mine. And when I close my eyes, I'm right back in those moments with her, like I never left. Like we never left.

"Alessandra, slow down!" I shouted, gripping the seat as she sped down the quiet Parisian streets, driving my Ferrari like it was a getaway car.

She just smirked, that maddening, beautiful smirk. "What's the matter, Alessio?" she teased, glancing over at me with that mischievous glint in her eyes. "Can't handle a little speed?"

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