Broken Melodies (NCT)

Mark

Unfulfilled dreams are the worst. Especially those that can't be forgotten, no matter how hard you try. Even if you claw your way through opposite sides of the earth, your prize will only get further and further away, until you can't see it anymore.

That was what it was like for Mark. A constant uphill battle that always somehow ended up with him slipping and sliding all the way down to the bottom. Excruciating work all wasted into nothingness.

No one supported him. "You can't make a living off writing books," his parents would say. "Be something that will teach life skills, like a doctor. Then maybe you'll be useful."

And he had proved himself to be useful. Passing grade school in flying colors, he had started studying in the SNU at age 22 due to a combined effort of outstanding grades and his parents desperately pulling the strings behind the scenes. He would be a doctor, and make them proud, putting this whole author dream behind him.

Except that he couldn't. The pull was irresistible, followed with the instinct that being a doctor was not what would make him happy. So, despite his overwhelming workload, he found at least an hour a day to dedicate his time to the small novel he was writing in a notebook he kept hidden under his pillow. It wasn't much, but he hoped to finish writing a good enough story to be accepted by a publishing house. Then maybe his parents would open their eyes and see that being a doctor was not for him, and support their son's dream.

"Whatcha writing?" came a loud voice behind him, causing Mark to jump and slam the notebook shut. Whirling around, he smacked his roommate Kevin with the book countless times, until the panic in his heart settled.

"Kevin Moon! How many times did I tell you not to bother me while writing?" he screeched, voice growing high pitched. "Ah, privacy, you know?"

Kevin back off, pretending to pout in his annoyingly exaggerated way. "Come on, estranged roomie! Don't you think I've earned the privilege of immersing myself in your endless knowledge? What are you hiding? Locations of secret drug stashes?"

Mark laughed. "Why would I write that? We've known each other since forever, man."

Kevin nodded. "About. . . twenty six years?"

Mark scoffed. That was ridiculous. "I'm twenty three though?"

"Exactly."

"It's just additional notes I picked up in class." Mark shrugged. For some reason, he felt embarrassed to tell his friend about his novel. "Nothing special."

"Well, it has to be something special now that you've said that." Kevin lunged forwards playfully, attempting to steal the notebook. "I need it, give it now!"

And that was how the night ended in laughs and joy, the empty crater of loneliness filling slightly in Mark's heart. Where would he be, without Kevin? He had to keep his friend close.

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Saturday, which meant a free day for him. He had already caught up with all his homework, and knew the material, leaving him open to hang out with some of his other friends, who still attended grade school.

"Milk!" he heard the cry before he could see the person, watching the kid barrel towards him. He jumped sideways just as Haechan was about to crash into him, the student falling onto the ground instead, evoking an explosion of laughter erupted from the crowd that followed him.

"It's great to see that school hasn't burned your sense of humor right out of you." Renjun rolled his eyes.

"I have the best sense of humor, thanks." Mark snapped, helping Haechan off the ground. "What's up? You never contact me."

"We just want to hang out with our buddy for the weekend. Is that so unusual?" Haechan pretend-pouted, screwing up his face in such an exaggerated way Mark physically cringed. "We were busy with classes, too."

"The most you do is spend an hour with homework." Chenle pointed out. "You don't even study for tests until the day before."

"And I still get higher grades than you." he jutted out his chin, a look of smug satisfaction on his face. "That just shows I'm so gifted and smart."

Renjun coughed, hiding his face in YangYang's shoulder as Haechan stared at him. "Did I say something wrong?"

Renjun closed his eyes, clearing his throat to compose himslef. "Sorry. I just never thought I'd hear the words 'gifted' and 'smart' used to describe you."

Of course. Huang Renjun, ever the positive ray of sunshine. Chenle choked trying not to laugh, while Jeno had to pretend to cry. "Sorry." he said. "those words were so touching, I just had to cry."

Haechan hit him on the back of the head. "Shut up."

"Where are we going to go, now that we're all gathered here?" Jeno changed the subject. "Are we going to talk in front of your school?"

"We can go to a PC room." Jeno suggested. They thought this was a good idea, so they hastened to before they became full.

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"Park Jisung, you idiot! Go to the right side, the right!" Haechan was screaming within five minutes, frustrated at the youngest's poor performance in the game. The little character on the screen took hit after hit until they faded into small pixels. Haechan threw up his arms. "You really have no sense in gaming!"

Mark laughed. Obviously, Haechan was overreacting and teasing Jisung at the same time, but it was ear-damaging to withstand his high screams every minute. It felt good to put down responsibilities and stop worrying every once in a while. He had almost forgotten what it felt like.

"Lee Donghyuck, seriously, stop screaming!" YangYang complained. "My ears are bleeding!"

What was supposed to be a light moment immediately turned solemn at the name, everyone going quiet while shooting uneasy glances at Haechan, who's face suddenly turned stiff. 'Oh you poor, confused kid' Mark inwardly groaned. He couldn't believe no one told the student about the unspoken rule when they were around Haechan: never say his birth name around him. Chenle was the only one who truly knew why, but every time they brought it up, the look on his face was that of such intensity they dropped the subject immediately.

"Well." Haechan laughed, a sound that was obviously forced. "You have some superpower that makes people go silent."

"Right. . ." YangYang smiled awkwardly, obviously picking up on the mood. The rest of the day was punctured by that awkwardness that crept its way unseen between the friends. Mark was inwardly relieved when they had agreed to leave around 2 PM, unable to stand the uncomfortable feeling for much longer.

"So. . . Mark." Chenle said as they were walking back to campus together. "I'm not sure if you remember who Lucas is: you know, the tall guy obsessed with boxing a few grades above you? Well, he just got into the Olympics and I'm wondering if you would want to join me for a dinner party with a few of my other friends?"

That was unexpected. "I can't, Chenle." he said. "I'm in med school. I can't afford to party and take a hit to my grades."

"Ah Mark!" Chenle complained. "You study too much! Just loosen up and go for one evening, okay? You need to have some fun once in a while."

Mark laughed. "Alright. Just for you."

While Chenle was relaying all the important info Mark thought to himself: maybe this was a change for the better.