The One I'll Never Let Go Of (Kili fanfic)

Chapter Seven-Storms and Falling

I found myself awake before any of the others just as the sky started to turn pink. I looked up at the clouds that slowly floated past, and I noticed I could see my breath in the air. The goosebumps all over my body made me pull the blanket up to below my eyes and roll over to curl up.
But when I rolled over, I saw how close Kili had shifted to me in the night.
We were only a few inches away from each other.
He lay on his back while using his bag as a pillow. One arm was slung over his stomach while the other lay on the ground, close to to get up and spend some time reading before Thorin demanded us to keep walking. I took my bag and my blanket and found a rock big enough for me to sit against. The rock was cold, so I wrapped my blanket around my back to provid some insulation. I dug through my bag and found my book.
I opened it and my two flowers fell into my lap. I picked them up and smiled. They were only flowers, but they meant the world to me. I tucked them back into the book, but closer to the back cover.
I found the spot I had left off from, and reviewed the words. I was pleased to know that I remebered the majority of them. I hoped that some day I could speak the language fluently.
After a while or reading, I assumed the dwarves would be up soon, so I stood and walked over to find them stirring and sitting up.
When Kili spotted me, he gave me a tired smile.
I smiled back, trying no to laugh. He leaned against the fallen log that we slept in front of, with an arm over his tired eyes.
Bilbo was already up and fixing his clothes from the night.
I wrapped my cloak tighter around me with my arms crossed and I walked over to him.
He looked up and immediatly a guilty look came over his face.
"Isola, I'm sorry about what I said last night, I didn't realize it bothered you so much."
I looked down. "You're not the one to apologize, Bilbo. I overreacted, that's all. I'm the one who should be sorry."
He looked at me for a moment. "I don't know exactly went on in your home. But I have a few guesses, and assuming what I know, I should have been more careful with what I was saying."
I froze. "What do you think you know?" I asked hesitantly.
"Your mother told me of how she was treated. And when she passed," He paused. "You began acting the same as she did after a while. So I assumed he was treating you like how he treated your mother."
I looked down, feeling suddenly vulnerable with now both Kili and Bilbo knowing.
"You're right." I said.
Bilbo nodded and gave me a sad smile. "I know."
He pulled me in for a tight hug. "I'm always here for you, you know that, right?"
I nodded. "Yes."
When he pulled away I looked up. "I told Kili last night."
He looked suprised. "Oh? Did he ask?"
I shrugged. "Kind of. But I also thought he should know."
He nodded, understanding. "Well, I'm glad you've found someone to confide in."
I smiled and looked over where the others were packing up.
Kili glanced our way.
"Me too." I said.
The two of us made our way to the rest of the company.
"There's nothing for breakfast today lads. And lass." Balin said. "We'll have to continue on and find something to eat later on."
The dwarves grumbled and let out a few complaints, but I still wasn't hungry even though I had skipped dinner last night.
So with nothing else to do and all of our things packed up, we started walking towards the rocky mountain base, and evetually began scaling up it. The breath was taken out of everyone's lungs by the time the earth evened out, and we were able to walk along the ridge, which was flat.
The air was even colder up here, but I felt myself sweating under my layers that had kept me warm earlier.
I looked around me in awe at the sight. I could see every peak of the mountain range, and it felt like I was on top of the world.
Next to me, Kili chuckled. "You haven't traveled much, I take it."
"I've never been past Bree. But you've seen this before?" I asked.
"This is only our second time." Fili walked up next to me so that I walked between the brothers.
"We saw it on the way to the Shire." Kili said.
"Do you travel much?" I asked.
"Typically only to visit our family in the Iron Hills. But that isn't too often." Fili said.
"Are you and your family close?" I asked.
Fili and Kili shared a look.
"Dain, our distant and oldest cousin is a bit..." Kili started.
"Bold." Fili continued.
"Arrogant." Kili added.
"And boastful." Fili finished.
"But our other younger cousins are much more pleasant." Kili said.
I smiled.
"And of you're family?" Fili asked me.
I hesitated. "As far as immediate family, it's just me and my father."
"And your cousins?" Kili asked. "Besides Bilbo."
"Well that's a complicated question. Almost everyone in the Shire is related somehow. But neither my mother nor my father had any sibilings who have had children. Yet anyways. I really only do know Bilbo the best and I'm closest to him."
"How much older is he than you?"
"He's 19 years older than me. I'm thirty one, he's fifty." I smiled. "How old are you two?"
"Eighty-two." Fili answered.
"Seventy-seven." Kili said.
"I always though Fili was way older." I said.
"What are you saying Isola?" Fili joked. "You think I look old?"
"No, no, I just..." I laughed, struggling for words. "You seem-"
Fili chuckled. "I know what you mean."
I smiled at him.
By now, the skys were growing dark with rain clouds and seemed to get bigger and closer every minute.
"Well that's just what we need, a storm." Dwalin complained.
"Oh, it's just a bit of rain. A little extra water never hurt anyone." Bofur said.
"Exept in terms of hypothermia." Bilbo countered.
"Well, if you turn into ice, we'll be able to store meat a bit better." Bofur said.
My jaw dropped at his comment, and I looked to Kili and Fili to see the same shock on their faces.
I tried not to laugh, but between Bofur's inoccent look, and Bilbo's stunned expression, I couldn't hold it in.
After only a while more of walking, rain started to come down and lighting started to flash. We had made it to a steep trail that went along the side of a cliff.
The path was extremely slippery, and I grew tense as I continued to walk as carefully as I could. The wind howled and the rain droplets felt more like hail strones on my face. My eyes watered and I could barly see.
The sky had grown so dark that it was almost like waking at night time.
"Hold on!" I heard Thorin shout.
Ahead of me, I saw Bilbo slip.
I gasped and alsmot ran foward, but stopped when I saw that Dwalin had caught him and pulled him back up.
"We must find shelter!" Thorin yelled.
"Look out!" Someone shouted.
I wiped my eyes and looked up to see a boulder come crashing down the mountainside and hit the ledge above us. The rock shattered and rocks shattered down on us.
I pressed myself to the rock wall in attempt the shield my face. I felt a few sharp shards hit my back, but my head and face were fine.
When we all stepped away and Balin pointed up. "This is no thunder storm! It's a thunder battle, look!"
I followed Balin's finger and saw an enormous rock monster pull away from the mountain.
My jaw dropped at the sight.
I couldn't beleive such things existed.
The giant grabbed a handful of the mountain next to it.
"Well bless me!" I heard Bofur say. "The ledgends are true. Giants! Stone giants."
The giant threw the boulder at another rock giant who had appeared. The new giant was thrown back into the mountain side by the force.
"Take cover, you'll fall!" Thorin shouted.
Kili jerked Bofur back against the wall.
I felt the ground crumbling underneath me, so I pressed my back as close as I could to the mountainside. Layers of rocks slowly kept falling away, getting closer and closer to my feet, teasing me with death.
I couldn't hear my heart, but I could feel it pounding in my chest and in my throat.
I felt an arm press against me, holding me closer to the wall. I didn't care who it was, but I happened to glance over and see it was Kili.
I grasped his sleeve and held onto if for dear life, when I felt him being pulled away. I eventually had to let go or else I would fall.
I looked down to see a vault forming between us. I nearly jumped across, only so I could stay with Bilbo and Kili, but Fili held me back.
"Kili, grab my hand!" Fili shouted.
But Kili was too far for us to reach.
He watched us with panic and desperation in his eyes.
We were pulled farther and farther apart from the other half of the company, and rocks and boulders fell between us. I looked over to see a giant approaching us.
I realized, that were on the legs of a stone giant.
And were were being attacked.
Our giant had been hit by another slamming it's head into us. As our giant stumbled, the dwarves on the other ledge were able to jump to safety.
A few more blows were made and all we could do was hold on and try not to get crushed. Another giant appeared and grabbed a handful of rock from just above us and slammed our giants face with it. It sent him reeling back, but he regained his balance, only for another to throw a a boulder at it's head.
The giant fell back, and the leg we were on passed the others who had made it to safety, but not close enough for us to join them.
Our giant let out a roar, and started falling fowards, right into the cliffside.
The only things I could focus on was the jagged rock coming straight for my chest, and the sound of my screams joining the others.
I had nothing to hold onto, but the force of moving foward kept me in place.
We slammed into the rock wall, and it wasn't as painful as I expected. I fell several feet and hit the ground with the others.
I lie there for a moment, or maybe an hour, losing all track of time.
I didn't know if I was dead or alive, or just in shock.
I felt myself shaking and the rain that still hit my face, but I was sure that I was dead.
How could I still be alive?
I was pulled out of my shock when Kili jerked me up by my shoulders and looked at me with wide, terrified eyes.
"Are you alright?" He asked desperatly.
I couldn't speak.
"Isola?" He shouted over the wind and rain.
I blinked a few times and nodded. "I'm ok." I finally spoke, finding my words.
He pulled me to his chest for such a tight hug that I could barly breath.
"Is everyone else alright?" I asked.
Kili pulled away to answer me, but just then Bofur shouted.
"Where's Bilbo?"
I snapped to attention and scanned the group for my cousin.
"Where's the hobbit?"
I spotted him first, but only his hands gripping the edge. I scrambled to my feet and rushed over to Bilbo.
I lay down on my stomach and grasped his arms, but I couldn't pull him up. He started slipping even more, pulling me with him, but I refused to let go.
"Hold on!" I screamed.
By now I felt myself tipping too far over the edge, but to my releif, someone pressed down on my feet and legs, keeping me in place.
Bilbo's arm, wet from the rain, started slipping though my hands.
"No!" I shouted.
I let out a frustrated cry through grit teeth and held on with everything I could.
But to my terror, his hands slipped and fell a ways.
I let out a shriek. "Bilbo!"
He had caught a small ledge to hold onto, but there was no way he could on for much longer.
Two of the dwarves lay next to me, tying to get to Bilbo, but their arms weren't long enough to reach him.
It felt like we lay there forever, trying to get to him when Thorin jumped down and landed on a foothold. He hoisted Bilbo up over the edge and we all clutched at him, trying to pull him the rest of the way up.
Then Thorin slipped and Dwalin caught him.
I reach for him too and pulld him up with all my strength, but when he had gotten to a place he could pull himself up, I felt myself sliding towards the edge, facefirst.
The sight of what was below me, sharp rocks and an endless fall terrified me.
I felt hands grabbing at me feet, and then I was pulled all way up by my waist.
When I came back up over the edge, I landed on my side, and shook even more, but I was able to sit up this time.
I looked over to see the dwarves sitting and laying down, panting.
But Kili still had a tight grip on me, and I felt his hands trembling.
My heart raced, and I could almost feel his too.
He didn't say anything, but he just looked at me and didn't let go. His breathing was fast and hard.
"I thought we'de lost our burglar." Dwalin said.
I looked up, taking heavy breaths.
Thorin stood up. "He's been lost, ever since he left home." He said. I could hear the fear in his shaking voice. "Both of them have." he said harshly.
My heart sunk at his words.
"They never shoud have come." He added. "They have no place amongst us."
And just like the giants had shattered each other, I felt myself shatter.
Thorin left us no time to recover when he ordered Dwalin to lead on.
Evryone stood up and Kili pulled me to my feet.
"Are you alright?" I asked him.
He nodded, but looked distracted with watching Thorin, anger evident on his face. But then he looked down at me and his face softened slightly.
"I'm fine. Are you?"
I nodded while my breathing slowed. "Yes, although I should be dead at least twice over, now." I brushed the hair out of my eyes.
"Move on!" Thorin shouted. "We must find shelter."
Kili grit his teeth at his uncles voice, but with a gentle hand on my back, he let me walk ahead of him.
It wasn't long before we found a dark and cold cave, but dry.
"It looks safe enough." Dwalin said.
"Search to the back, caves in the mountains are seldom unoccupied." Thorin said.
I shivered as we entered the cave and the men searched the area.
"There's nothing here." Dwalin turned to us, holding a lantern which iluminated the entire cave.
"Right then, let's get a fire going." Gloin said, rubbing his hands together.
"No. No fires. Not in this place. Get some sleep, we start at first light."
My hopes were immediatly let down. All I wanted was to dry off and get warm next to a fire.
"We were to wait in the mountains until Gandalf joins us." Balin said. "That was the plan."
"Plans change." Thorin answered.
Thorin turned to Bofur. "Bofur, take the first watch. Everyone, get some sleep."
I moved to make my bed when Thorin's voice stopped me.
"Isola."
I turned, not knowing what to hear from him, either an insult or an apology, as I hoped.
But it turned out to be neither.
"What happened to your back?" He asked.
I looked at him confused. "What..." I reached up behind my back but didn't feel anything.
Thorin walked over to me and roughly turned me by my shoulers to examine me.
I saw Kili walk over out of the corner of my eye.
"What is it?" I asked.
"You've bled through your cloak." Kili said. "Can you take it off?"
I shook it off of my shoulders and caught it before it hit the ground.
I felt the cool air meet my skin, telling me I had ripped through the back of my dress. Kili gently pulled some of the fabric away so he could see better.
Him and Thorin grew silent.
"Is it bad?" I asked.
"Oin will get you fixed up. It's just a scrape, but we don't need you to grow ill with infection." Thorin said and went to talk to Oin.
"Is it really just a scrape?" I asked Kili.
He looked hesitant. "It's a bit worse than that."
"I don't even feel it so it can't be that bad."
I glanced at Thorin and Oin to see Oin walking towards me.
I panicked.
It wasn't that I didn't trust him, but I knew I would have to let down the back of my shirt for him to reach the wound, and I didn't want anyone to see the scars on my shoulders.
I would also rather Kili be the one to see my bare back out of anyone else in the company.
I looked to Kili quickly. "Can you do it?" I asked. I didn't want Oin to hear and get hurt by my words.
He looked a bit suprised, but he seemed to understand.
He gave me a small smile and turned to Oin who had come up next to us. He carefully took the healing bag and lantern and pat him on the shoulder.
"Thank you." Kili said nonchalantly.
Oin seemed taken aback at first, but then he gave Kili a smug look which made me blush.
I tried to hide it by turning and finding a spot to sit.
Kili followed me and sat behind me, with his back to the others so he was covering me with himself and I could have as much privacy as possible, for which I was incredibly thankful for.
He rumaged around in the bag for a moment before I felt his hands at the hem of my shirt.
"May I?" he asked for permission to undo the buttons that trailed down my back.
I nodded. "Yes."
I couldn't help but smile at his politeness and asking for my consent.
At least my face was turned away.
I felt him carefully undo each button as to not disturb my scrape.
Or whatever it was.
He undid the buttons until just above the small of my back, and he placed each side of fabric over my shoulders.
"How bad is it?" I asked.
Kili sighed. "It's not awful. But it's not great either. It'll take two weeks or so to heal, I reckon. You do have quite a few scrapes all over though."
Kili took a wet cloth and started wiping away some of the excess dried blood.
"How did you even do this?" He chuckled
"I have no idea." I paused and looked up, remembering. "It actually must have been when the first boulder crashed over us. I had felt the rocks hit me, but I didn't think it was enough to make me bleed."
"Well, it was." I could hear the consentration in his voice.
I winced as the cloth hit a sensitve spot of skin.
"Sorry." Kili said. "Fili, I need some more water." He called.
"On it." Fili answered.
"Walk backwards when you bring it." Kili ordered.
"What?" I heard Fili walking towards us.
Kili stopped and turned.
I craned my neck.
"Backwards." Kili said firmly, turning a circle with his finger in the air.
"Oh, right." Fili said.
I smiled and chuckled.
He turned and walked to us backwards with one hand over his eyes, and in the other he held the skin of water to Kili.
"There you are."
Kili took it and rolled his eyes at Fili, which I laughed at.
Kili rewet the cloth and continued dabbing at my skin when Fili walked away.
After all the dried blood had been wiped off Kili let my skin dry for a few moments before applying the ointment.
I heard Kili open the jar of ointment and let out a a sound of disgust.
He held the canister over for me to smell. I leaned over and crinkled my noise.
"Ugh. That's terrible. I don't want to smell like that." I complained.
Kili chuckled. "Maybe the bandage will help conceal the smell."
"I hope."
Kili carefully started spreading the ointment over my wounds. It felt nice and cooling for the most part. But every once and a while, a sharp sting would poke at my raw skin.
They were bearable, until I had one so painful I sucked in a sharp breath and arched my back slightly.
I felt Kili hands pull away. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah." I took in a deep breath.
To my relief, the pain subsided shortly after that.
Even more gently this time, he put on a bit more and then let my skin breath before putting the bandage on.