You, Again

Why Are You Everywhere

"Ooph" Devin had just walked smack dab into someone on the street. The lid to her ice coffee balancing precariously in her left hand as she death gripped her purse with her right.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry." Wait. She knew that voice. It was overly polite with the slightest hint of a southern drawl. She looked up.

"Kiera?!" Kiera looked back at her in mutual disbelief.

"Devin! What are you doing here? Oh my god what a small world. Can you believe we found each other in the city? You know I always tell people New York City is big and small at the same time but now it's true." Kiera paused for air. Devin had forgotten her habit of over-enthusiastic run on sentences. She always sounded hyped and exhausted at the same time.

"Well, I just got a new job!" Devin kept the part about her having no idea what said job actually was to herself. The less Kiera knew, the better.

"Congratulations! We need to go out for drinks. What are you doing in an hour? I need to go pick up my stuff at the office but are you around for dinner? Or maybe apps? Are you okay going somewhere in Union Square?"

Devin ignored the fact that Kiera seemed not to care if she had said yes or not. Despite the fact she was nearing negative money in her bank account, she reluctantly accepted. What else did she have to do? She had just gotten a job. Albeit, a random one. But there was a paycheck in her future. Surely, that was worth celebrating.

"Yea of course, that sounds great. I'll se you in a bit."

Devin watched as Kiera rushed south down 7th avenue. She did an about face on 38th street and headed east. If she had an hour to kill, she could at least window on Broadway.

---

An hour later, Devin found herself at Gramercy Tavern. When Kiera had suggested Union Square, Devin assumed it would be one of the local dive bars they had frequented in their early post-college years. She had not anticipated ordering a twenty-five dollar martini and chugging half of it to get over the price shock. But alas, here she was.

Seated at the bar she swiveled her head over her shoulder keeping an eye on the door. Kiera had texted. She would be a few minutes late! But on her way! Crazy day at the office!

Devin took a calculated sip of her martini. She had to make it last the entirety of their night. She couldn't jump the gun.

She looked out the window and saw a lock of blonde hair pass by. Over the years she got used to paying attention to blondes. She knew the sensation of feeling the rush of curiosity followed by fear followed by disappointment when it wouldn't be him. But the hope, always the hope that it could in fact one day be him is what kept her looking out windows day after day. She thought it would abate when she got into a new relationship. But through Charlie, then Adam then Xander, she learned that she would still look over their shoulder just in case it was him.

She let the thought that it could be him flit through her mind on this particular day. It wasn't a luxury she typically afforded herself. It only led to a spiral of self-loathing. How she had broken his heart, tried to recover. Eagerly gave too much of herself and suffered the consequences. The constant "what if" that kept her up some nights.

No, she couldn't let the vodka lead her down this road. But yet, there she was, opening up her phone. She didn't even need to search for the photo. She knew the day it was taken and robotically she scrolled to the exact moment in time where she felt like herself and he felt like him and they were just two people about to have something happen.

The photo popped up on her screen as she heard "Hey! Look who I found." She slammed her phone face down as everything came into focus. Kiera leaning in to give her a hug. A familiar torso at her eye level. His scent of downy like a rush to her senses. The low, soft spoken voice. "Hey, Devin."