𝐏𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐄𝐈𝐈 | Review Shop II

Socks on The Beach [Iris]

Book: Socks on The Beach
Author: wannabebumblebee
Reviewer: Iamjustasapien 
Chapters read: 11

****

Cover:
I have to admit the cover is simple yet eye-catching. The style is simple and sets the mood of the story. I don't have any complaints against it, however, I do recommend the author to add a quote on the cover. Since, simple quotes catches a reader's attention. (in my opinion). Apart from that, the cover is relevant to the plotline and title and requires no changes. Kudos to the graphic designer!

Title:
'Socks on The Beach' is a unique title choice. I don't often come across such titles which are simple but intriguing. It evokes curiosity and is relevant to the plotline. I have no complaints against it, good job.

Blurb:
"June has only one more summer before she marries her high school sweetheart. She intends to make the most of it, but she has no idea what is waiting for her in Dolphin Coast. Socks on the Beach is a tale of steamy love, jaw-dropping heartbreak, and genuine friendship. In no particular order. "

Now, I, as a reader, was not that much impressed by the blub. The reason? It gives off the storyline right away and lacks substance. You could rephrase the sentences like this:

"June has only one more summer break left before she sails off to marry her high school sweetheart. She intends to make the most of it, but she has no idea what is waiting for her at Dolphin coast.

---

"If you want anyone to actually tolerate you around here, you're gunna have to learn to say 'please' and 'thank you.' Bare minimum stuff here."

----

Yes, she was bullied for her name.

I mean c'mon.

PP.

---

"Girl. I'm so-sorry to tell ya this... but he's-a... a lost cause. Or gay. Sam... Sam thinks he's gay," Rosemary said, reaching up and nervously rubbing the back of her neck.

***

Join her in this journey filled with drunk memories, steamy love, heartbreak and genuine friendship. Feel what June feels during the summer that changes everything, for everyone. After all, being a fiance for a gay man does not sound bad does it?"

Now, the blurb lacks a bit of substance, therefore, I added a few dialogues from different chapters to enhance the reading experience. Due to that, it now ignites curiosity in readers and sets the mood of the story. Now, perception differs, but I highly suggest the author to re-write the blurb to something like that. You are not obligated to do that, though. Apart from that, I could not spot any grammatical errors in the blurb, so, good job on that!

Plot:
The plot is, well, quite a rollercoaster of hazy drunk conversations and really good chemistry. Although, I could not read the whole book, I have to admit the plot line is well paced and quite enjoyable. I personally, love the originality of your work and the descriptions from different emotions. For example:

"Steaming jealousy struck my chest and eyes first before leaching into the rest of my jittery drunken body. My heart beat echoed through my ear canals, and I shook my head slowly, trying to maintain my briefly-found composure. And avoid an aggravated assault charge."

The way you have described jealousy here is spectacular! I was awestruck once I read this. However, I did find quite a few mistakes. In the chapter 'The Captain's Hook: Bar and Grill', you have not broken down one big para. Although, this happens only once, I still do recommend the author to break the big para down, since, this just ruins the reading experience. Additionally, I did spot a few errors:

1) "...Took some pictures and kicked the summer off? Just us. And Perry, just because he doesn't know anyone here either."

2) ""Dibs!" Perry's agitating voice hollered, unseen, but certainly coming from the open gray door mere feet from the fireplace/"

3) "I grazed my hand over the cool surface of the marble countertops."

4) "To the left, a white brick electric fireplace pretended to warm the already-too-hot space.."

5) " Rosemary and Sam had asked me every weekend since I started working at Dolphin Coast animal hospital a year-and-a0-alf ago, but I'd never gone...."

Now, the errors are few but I highly suggest the author to correct them, since, it just ruins the reading experience. Lastly, do give a disclaimer about the use of alcohol and drugs at the end of the chapters which include such scenes . Since, many might try to recreate the act in real life.

Character development:
Since, I have not read a lot of chapters I can't say much about the character development. But I just know that Nate would change June's perception for the good. Not to mention, I loved Sam. She is such a fun character. Although, June is quite relatable and fun, I prefer Sam. And not to mention, Nate is someone all introverts can relate to.

Perry is such a goof ball and Pearl is a wolf in a sheep's skin. I did not expect her to act so seductive when she spotted Jhonny amongst the crowd. Nonetheless, I love how each character stands out and one does not have to scroll back and memorize all. You introduce their background in a good pace. Good job!

Grammar and vocabulary:
Apart from a few typos (I have mentioned them in the 'plot' section), I could not spot any grammatical errors. Good job on that!

Improvements need to be done:
As I have mentioned in the 'plot' section, a few mistakes are done correct them. The blurb could be re-written, to hook a reader once they click on your masterpiece. I do have a suggestion, you can add character aesthetics and banners, to enhance the reading experience. Again, this is just my opinion, you are not obliged to do that. Your writing is flawless and they way you describe scenes is just breathtaking. My personal favorite paragraph was this:

"The sunset was beautiful, one of the best I had ever seen. Pink and orange melted into one another as dark blue sky threatened to snuff out the entwined lovers. The ocean was a molten mirror to the conflict, and with each passing minute it became more clear who would prevail. I breathed in the salty winds."

Overall enjoyment:
Your book was really enjoyable, I was immediately hooked once I started reading it. The cliffhangers just give the right amount of suspense to make a reader hooked to your book. The writing, humor and originality just makes your book stand out. The cover is well-made, the blurb does need more work but the plotline is well-written. Your book has a great potential to reach hights. However, the mistakes are holding you down. Do correct them and shine bright! Thank you.

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