Déjà Vu

Chapter 13

"The winner of Eurovision Song Contest 2024 is..." Everything went silent. I could hear my loud breath echoing through the backstage. "...Croatia!" I screamed. I screamed so loud that I drowned out the chimed cheering. Marko fell into my arms. My dress was soaked in his tears but I didn't mind and stroked over his hair. His background dancers and friends surrounded him, jumping and shouting his name synchronically. I chuckled. My eyes also filled with happy tears but I tried to hold them back, in order to not ruin my perfectly applied make-up. Slowly Marko stood up swaying and turned around. I nodded as a confirmation to go but instead he grabbed my hand and helped me up carefully. I couldn't resist to giggle when he squatted in front of me, so I was able to climb up his back. On our way to the stage, a lot of our competitors approached us and congratulated him. It was really funny when they tried to hug him but I was still on his back, so they kind of hugged me too. "Perfect princess treatment, dude!", Joost added to his congratulation, which made me laugh. The cheering became even louder on our way to the stage. Our fans clapped rhythmically into their hands and shouted not just Marko's name but also mine. It felt like we both won the ESC. That was when I realized that it was kind of relieving that I couldn't participate at the contest anymore after that one incident. Finally we arrived on stage and Marko let me down. He took my hand again and supported me while walking up to Loreen, who hugged him quickly before handing him the cup. "You did so well! Congratulation!", she yelled over the loud noise. Tears gathered in Marko's eyes again when he thanked her. "Celestia! I wish you a speedy recovery!" I smiled politely. "I will get better sooner than you think!", I answered and chuckled. Very soon...

A lot of time had passed. It was true. Marko won the Eurovision Song Contest. It wasn't very surprising though. I knew he was extremely popular and I had to admit that I was kind of jealous because the majority of his fans were girls. Nevertheless, he did a great job and I was pretty proud of him. But that wasn't the only true statement. I didn't lie when I said, I wasn't able to participate at the Contest anymore after that one incident. Actually it is pretty clear, which incident I meant. When I realized how Rosanne was really like and how devilish she had been without my earlier recognition, I was shocked. I was more than surprised: She broke me. Of course, I hadn't known her for that long and she wasn't that much important to me to be actually able to break me. It had been her words, she used, the sentences and statements she spit out. She destroyed me with her speech about my dad, my sore point. After I fainted, I wasn't the same person anymore. I literally nearly died, because my blood pressure had sunken that much, my heart almost stopped pounding. They said, it was caused by the frequent loss of consciousness. Sounds logically. Well, you see, I made it. But the only problem was that that incident kind of damaged a part of my brain. It wasn't that much of a problem that I had to fear death again but it meant that I needed a lot of rest and a break of any kind of stress. Briefly stated: I wasn't allowed to take part at the ESC, so I got kind of eliminated. It really sucked. I was extremely depressed and stopped talking to anybody, even to Marko and my beloving sister. The incident was also in the news and that didn't help me raising my mood. After a few days I started accepting my fate and decided to support Marko instead of being depressed. My fans wrote me lovely letters and uploaded videos on social media talking about how much they'd miss me. Marko also gave me all the love that I needed, every day and of course, every night. But one important aspect wasn't fulfilled yet...

It was cold and the breeze didn't help either. It was already hours after midnight when I decided to get some fresh air outside of the arena. I sat down on the edge of the hill with the view on the city. It was beautiful and the moon shone down on me. But there was something missing... "Celestia!", I heard my man shout behind me. I chuckled and shook my head. Of course he followed me. Marko was such a sweet, loving boyfriend. What would I want more when I got him? He sat down right beside me and put his arm over my shoulder. A tremble of coldness hit him and I laughed. "Why would you sit here in the cold? It's much warmer inside!" "You know what?", I interrupted him and looked him deeply in the eyes. His lips were parted and his mimic was confused and overwhelmed. "Uhm, what?", Marko asked, tilting his head. My gaze went back to the breathtaking view in front of me. I knew I had to tell him one day but I didn't know that it would be that hard. "What's wrong?" Marko stroked over my back, looking worried at me. "I...I've known you before." Abruptly he stopped his movement. It was silent. The only noise you could hear was my shaky breath. "What...do you mean?", he asked hesitating. I inhaled intensely before I turned my head back to him. "I mean...I didn't meet you the first time at the stairs back then. I've seen you before, I just didn't realise it was you because you've changed so much." Marko shook his head confused and ran his hand through his whitish hair. "That's not possible, Celestia, because I can't remember meeting you before. Except you erased my memories", the last sentence made him smirk slightly. "I think you didn't even see me." It was silent again. Some of the street lights in the city turned off and as a result, it looked like the moon shone even brighter than before. "You know, I always had these Déjà-vu's. I had them...because my subconscious tried to tell me that I know you." "Wow...", Marko breathed, "that makes sense. But when exactly did you see me?" "It was when my dad left us to get our stuff", I whispered and felt my eyes tearing up. "You were standing there with your mum and I couldn't help but stare at you. I fell in love with you while my dad was dying somewhere!" I started sobbing and buried my face into my knees. "Hey...",he made me wrap my arms around him and stroked sensitively over my back again. I knew that that information shocked him, I heard his heart pound hard against his chest. Still he tried to comfort me. When I calmed down, I pulled away. Neither of us spoke. But then I smiled. Marko's gaze darted to me. "You were my first love", I whispered and grinned dreamy, "It's been twelve years. My hope that I would see you again one day, kept me alive through that hard time." His mouth stood open and smoke left it because of the freezing temperatures. Suddenly his eyes widened. He looked like he saw a ghost. "Wait! Wait...wait...wait...", he murmured. "I can remember!", he shouted. I turned around to face him with shock in my eyes. "W-what do y-you mean?!", I asked nervously. "I can remember that I was once in Austria with my parents on vacation. We were just a few days but I don't memorize what we did there anymore", he explained with sparkly eyes. "Can...can you remember me?" Marko shook his head disappointedly. "But I'm sure that I saw you there because you always looked so familiar to me", he added which raised my hope.

"Celestia?" Marko and me were lying on the grass with closed eyes. I had to admit I nearly fell asleep. "Yeah?", I asked. "What exactly did you see when you fainted?" My heart started raising and my body was hit with a wave of tremble. "When I had these Déjà-vu's?" It was obvious that he meant that but I was getting nervous. He nodded. I took a sharp breath. "I saw you. At the sea. Your gaze was empty and kinda cold. One time there were also blue lights, looking like the one's from police cars", I explained. Marko sat up with narrowed eyebrows. "Empty and cold?! Damn it, I hope I do not always look like that!", he shouted pouting with crossed arms. I giggled and messed up his hair. "No, you do not. Don't worry." Marko snarled and leant in. His lips met mine and I immediately kissed him back. It was soft and full of love. His hand was buried in my hair and his short beard tickled me. I pulled away and smiled. "Hey, Marko?", I breathed and he looked up from my red tinted lips to my eyes. "Hm?", he hummed with a deep voice. A shiver ran down my spine. How could a man be so sexy?! "When we have a child..." His eyes widened.

"...let's call her Déjà-vu."