Invergent

Chapter Twelve

Elise's Perspective:

After what I guess to be half an hour, a woman walks into our dormitory. I pull off my hood to get a better look. She has half her hair shaved off, dark eyeliner, pale skin that contrasts her smokey eye makeup, black lipstick, and a spiked choker. She wears fingerless leather gloves, leather pants, a black shirt and a leather jacket over that. I've never seen one person love leather so much.

I look around the room. All of the Candor are huddled together in a group in the opposite corner as me, two of the Erudite are cuddled up together in one of their beds, and the other Erudite is keeping to himself. I look back to the women in black, who now holds the attention of everyone in the room.

"Hello transfers, I'm Nadia." She looks around the room, studying every single one of us. "I was assigned to get you all in Dauntless blacks. Follow me."

None of us hesitate, all filing out of the room. As much as I want a new outfit, the thought of leaving Michale's hoodie behind makes me sick. It's the only thing I have left of my family. But I am excited to not be an Amity girl anymore; to just be a blank slate. I think it'll be easier if I can just start over. Nadia leads us to a small shop full of Dauntless black clothes and takes us into a cramped back room.

"Okay, the clothes in the boxes are old clothes from past initiates or members. I'd recommend picking out two to three outfits. You have ten minutes." She walks out, leaving us to ourselves.

"They're just leaving us here alone?" One of the Candor says, like it's impossible to keep a single thought to herself. I mentally roll my eyes, then start digging around in the box closest to me.

"Aww, does poor little Chrissy need a babysitter twenty-four seven?"

"I didn't mean it like-"

"Let's not fight," the Erudite boy sighs as he starts digging around for new clothes. I find some denim cargo pants that look more like a dark gray than black and I take them. After another five minutes, I find a form-fitting long-sleeved black shirt that looks to be my size and put it in the small pile I'm starting to make for myself. I grab a pair of black jeans, cotton shorts, a black tank top, and a black T-shirt, then call it good. I go over to the pile of shoes on the ground and thank the stars above that there are a pair of leather matted combat boots in my size kept in good condition. The bottoms seem to have good enough grip.

"I like your boots," the candor girl named Chrissy says to me. I look up and smile at her. Maybe I could make a friend from Candor.

"Thanks." I try to think of something to say but I come up with absolutely nothing. I'm not good under pressure.

"Do you happen to know how to French braid hair?"

"Uh—yeah, actually. I do."

"Great. My hair is short, so it looks hideous in a ponytail, but I still want to keep it out of my face for initiation, ya know? Well, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind braiding it for me tomorrow? I would do it myself, but I don't know how. I see all the Amity girls braiding each other's hair at school though, so would you?" She rambles, kicking her shoes nervously. I smile up at her, this time genuinely. I was more than happy to help, especially if that meant getting closer to her. I'm in desperate need of alliances. Chrissy is tall and tan with dark hair that falls just to her shoulders. She's very pretty and looks like she can throw a punch.

"Sure."

"Great, thank you so much."

Later that night, I take a longer shower than necessary. I try to wash away all the awfulness of today. Just do your best, and you'll be fine, I tell myself while scrubbing the shampoo into my scalp. Just forget about cuts, worrying will do you no good. I often talk to myself when I get nervous. It helps calm me down. I change into my cotton shorts, black tank top, and Michale's hoodie and walk back to the dorm.

I sit on my bed and run my hands through my wet hair that's already starting to curl. I scrunch and unscrunch it until I get the pretty waves my mother is so fond of. I nervously start playing with my necklace and look around the room at all the other kids my age chatting. I wonder what the Dauntless-born are doing.

Soon the lights go off and I shift in my bed, trying to get comfortable. I hear one of the boys crying. I try to ignore him for a good five minutes until I can't stand it anymore. I don't want to be my parents who ignore emotion like it means nothing.

I slowly stand up and follow the noise of the horrible sobs. I sit on the edge of his bed and gently grab onto his arm. He jerks away before sitting up. I can't see him in the dark of the room, but I can sense his eyes on me.

"Are you okay?" I whisper.

"I—I just miss home." He sniffs.

"It'll be okay," I lie. It won't be okay, even if we do make it past initiation. Over half of us are going to be factionless and we'll always have to live with that. We'll always know that we took someone's place, someone who might deserve to be here more than us. And if we don't make it... I don't even want to think about it. But telling him all this won't help in the least.

"Promise?" He asks. I pause, taking a moment to think.

"Yes."

He throws his arms around me and buries his face into my shoulder. I feel his hot tears hit my skin and all I can think to do is pat his back. I wish I was more like my brother; he would know exactly what to do or what to say. But at least I'm here. At least I didn't make him go through this alone.

I sit with him for the next couple hours until I'm sure he fell asleep. I quietly tiptoe back to my own bed and fall asleep the minute my head hits the pillow.