Between Shadows: The Boy Who Found Heart in a Doctor's Heart.

Chapter eight: Shattered Love

Seungkwan 

One month later...

" Baby capybara.. c'mon,eat more." Vernon said, giving me extra peice of meat,as one day living in here I told him,I like spicy food because then I will drink water and in less food I will feel fool,the more slim I look more pleasurable I will be to the eyes of alphas,he groaned beside me, cleaning his equipments,as he came to give me hug,I stiffen and as he promised I don't have to do anything which I don't want to with him,he retreated back, listening to my oversharing, between me speaking and him listening,he told me he is child of prostituite just like me but the difference is his dad came despite of hating his mom and my dad didn't even though mamma always says he loves her that he will come to take her and safe me. 

I was never safed after mamma died, how many times I had tried to kill myself,end the misery of life, thirteen years old Seungkwan will envy me,if he get to know that he wasn't touched for one months straight despite of living with alpha.

" Kwannie will get fat and become ugly." I laughed,he cupped my face in his big, rough hands as he caressed my cheeksbone where I had applied yellow glitter which I had found in his Maa's room,when I asked if I can use it he nodded so I did. 

Alpha surely loves the paint and glitter on me as he drew some more on my neck, asking if I want to get tattoo,I refused,I have so many scars already, tattoo is not what I want but alpha drawing stars on my neck only exposed part of me feels good,blue paint and glitter, making scratch mark look like river flowing wiped the tears I had shed when I get beaten up for protecting myself. 

"Even if you are fat, that can be unhealthy but ugly,u in your name only stands for undeniably gorgeous,look at you, big brown eyes like honey,smile which can make sun jealous of it's shine," alpha hesitated as he caressed my cheeks, moving up to touch my eyes which shut close instinctively,his hands travels to my lips as my close eyes shot open at the touch," soft, plump lips," his hands then travel to back of my neck, brushing his hands through my hair, jerking me closer,I stare at him in disbelief, what I had excepted from alpha is no you are beautiful but this is unbelievable. 

" And your soft brown hair like cold blow on sweaty hot weather. Don't call yourself ugly, I want you to be healthy no matter how good this collarbone looks." He said, fixing the his shirt I had wore which slides down my shoulder every ten minutes,he picked up spoon again doing,I opened my mouth and eat the rice, feeling hotness on my face,smile keep appearing as I tried to keep them inside but if alpha gonna react like this I will call myself ugly forever. 

" You know, alpha... Kwannie's mamma used to sneak in kitchen with him to steal cheesecakes which Ezra Blackwell bought for auction,if you know from where Kwannie was bought and ran away." I said, trying to distract myself from the fact that alpha sitting in front of me wasn't stealing glance today,he is staring at me in the board day light but instead of feeling scared like I felt with that old man,I felt beautiful. 

He stares at me like I am sunflower in the garden of rose,as I eat my pineapple cheesecakes," so,my little capybara you like cheesecakes." He asked, again touching my hairs,his hands seemed to have his own mind because alpha himself doesn't notice how his hands went to my hair, until he massaged my scalp and I moaned,his hands stopped for a moment as he started to massage again as if wanted to hear me moan. 

" It's complicated, Kwannie love these because it reminds Kwannie of mamma and despite it because it reminds Kwannie of mamma too." I explained, wanting alpha to stop massaging my hair not because I hate it or find it uncomfortable but I despite it because it making me comfortable, giving me more comfortable than I deserve,then I can take. A knock came at door and alpha stand up, angling my head softly to look up at him as he placed a kiss on my forehead,what? 

And left me with my palpitating heart,which tried to run after alpha and demand to ask what is it? 

" Did Kwannie just get kiss on forehead? Woah it's your first kiss on forehead isn't it?" I asked myself following alpha to see who is at the door, Seunghyun the alpha who had brought me was on the door, talking to alpha,they are talking as if they know each other. 

Was it a trap? 

A way to break my heart,

Maybe a cosplay,it isn't, right? 

Alpha looks at me like I am sunflower in the garden of rose or it is look of prey I confused with adoration,did I mistaken it? 

What ifs screamed in my head as I ran into the alpha's room, shutting my ears to stop the voice in my head which called me fool,how fool I am to trust an alpha? An alpha? How fool I am to fall in love with alpha? Fool ,fool. 

" Kwannie is fool," I said hitting myself again and again,pain on my forehead soothes my pain in heart,as I yelled at myself, alpha from outside yelled, ordered me to open the door,his voice a held emotions a worriness but I can be mistaking again,I didn't open it, hiding in the corner with my head between my knees as my knees pressured into my chest,I cried, feeling like a fool, feeling thirteen, getting raped,forced again and again as my sobs turned into a outrage cry, alpha from outside started to break the door, that's it I piss the alpha,now he will force me,all the feeding food, buying groceries together, allowing to wear his clothes,use his Maa's glitter will end,all the happiness comes to end and sadness will rise, whatever he will do gonna hurt me more because," Kwannie loves him." I muttered as the door broke. 

" You think locking yourself can make me stay away from you?" He said walking towards me,I can't tell what his emotions are but whatever that is,it scared me.