𝙎𝙐𝙉𝙎𝙀𝙏 𝘽𝙊𝙐𝙇𝙀𝙑𝘼𝙍𝘿 // 𝙍𝙊𝙎𝙀́ 𝙓 𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙀𝙍

𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙁𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙩𝙚𝙚𝙣 - 𝙎𝙝𝙚'𝙨 𝘼 𝙈𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙊𝙛 𝘼 𝙂𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙤𝙪𝙨 𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙤𝙨

1964

In the morning, I stupidly thought that last night was a dream but I was given a reality check when I woke up and found Y/N's things were gone. Her suitcases were gone, the clothing that I pulled out from her bags yesterday night were no longer littering the floor of our hotel room and only my makeup remained on the vanity. She left and I had no idea if she would be home when I got to Los Angeles.

The phone doesn't stop ringing and I squeeze my eyes shut to ease the throbbing headache pounding in my head like a fist to a door. I pass by the mirror and catch a brief glimpse of my reflection. I looked horrid. I looked like I hadn't sleep in four days, my hair was a mess and my eyes were swollen. I looked like a mess.

That's what I was without Y/N; a mess.

On the fifth ring, I finally pick up the phone. Jisoo's on the other end. We were staying at the same hotel, why couldn't she just stop by?

"Hello?" My throat is scratchy from all the screaming I did last night, unfortunately this time, it wasn't the good kind of screams. "Rosie, finally," I pick up the bathrobe that I had thrown across the room after Y/N had walked out then I look for my pack of cigarettes, I left them on the side table last night. "What's wrong?"

"Did something happen between you and Y/N last night? She took an early flight back to Los Angeles this morning and told me to contact Nigel so that he can pack up your things."

How was I supposed to tell my wife's best friend that I had slapped her and prior to doing so, I demanded she tell me something from her past that she wasn't ready to talk about. Did Jisoo know about what happened between Grace and Y/N? She's been there way before I even met Y/N, surely she knew something. I bite my lip and contemplate my next choice of words. "We fought," Jisoo stays silent on the line and my shaky hands struggle to light my cigarette. I press the phone between my cheek and shoulder, using both hands to steady myself and get my cigarette burning.

"About what?"

"Silly stuff," Jisoo laughs on the other line. "Y/N wouldn't just leave you in New York by yourself if it was about 'silly stuff', Roseanne. I've seen you two fight many times before."

I've seen you two fight many times before.

That was a blow to my marriage. Were we really that bad? Were we that couple that constantly fights and everyone is just so used to it that they don't think anything of it anymore? Did we fight more than we loved?

What kind of marriage was mine turning into? The thought of my marriage turning into my parents' almost sends me into a spiral but Jisoo's voice cuts through my anxiety ridden thoughts faster than the panic can get to me. "Rosie? You there?"

"Yeah....I am."

I take a drag of my cigarette and stare out the window from my penthouse suite. It's like I can almost see Hell's Kitchen from where I'm standing. I was on the opposite side of Hell's Kitchen now. When I used to stare out my window as a child, I would see the Manhattan skyline. I saw the high rises, the empire state building and the bridge that separated me from what I was meant to be. Now, as I stare out a window from my presidential suite, all I can see is the life I've left behind.

It was liberating.

I've walked out of Hell's Kitchen winning but I ironically brought my parent's marriage into my own.