Two

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Fours POV:

When I trained initiates, I used to relish the quiet moments before dawn. I'd rise early, lace up my shoes for a run, then meet my friends for breakfast, feeling invigorated and ready to tackle the day. But these days, waking up before the sun feels like a burden, stretching my days longer than I want them to be.

As I glance at the clock, it reads 4:45 a.m. A few weeks ago, I made the decision to spread her ashes on the one-month anniversary of her passing. I couldn't bring myself to do it yesterday; the thought of doing it at the zipline, her favorite spot, felt wrong. I never got to share that moment with her. Now, another place comes to mind, one that feels just right.

I quickly throw on a black T-shirt, black cargo pants, and my boots. I catch a glimpse of my reflection and sigh—I need a haircut and a shave. I look like I belong to the factionless. I can't shake the feeling that she would be disappointed in me, seeing me as a selfish coward hiding away in my apartment, but I'm at a loss for what else to do.

Stepping outside, I realize I've only ventured out a handful of times since returning home from the Bureau. As I pass the chasm, memories flood back. I consider spreading her ashes by the rocks where we shared our first kiss, but it doesn't feel right. Al jumped into that chasm, a coward's escape, and she was nothing like him—she was the most selfless person I've ever known.

As I approach the exit of the compound, I hear footsteps behind me. I turn around, irritation bubbling up at the sight of Christina. "Hi, Four," she says, her voice low and concerned.

"Hi," I reply, shooting her a glare. I can't pinpoint why I'm so annoyed with her, but the feeling lingers.

"Where are you off to at this time of the morning, Four?"

"I'm off to find some peace and quiet, if you don't mind," I respond, my voice rough. I stand there for a moment, waiting for her to say something else, but when she doesn't, I turn and walk out the door.

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