Me and the Devil

24.

Back at the Chateau, JJ, Kiara, Pope and I are all playing a rousing game of fuck, marry kill on the porch while we wait for John B to get back from...whatever it is John B does when he disappears like that.

"Alright, your turn, y/n," Kiara says with a mischievous look in her eyes. Fuck, Marry, Kill: Rafe, Topper, Kelce."

I catch JJ glancing over, clearly interested in my answer, and I roll my eyes. I know what they expect me to say, especially JJ. But Kiara's smirk doesn't waver, daring me to choose.

"Ok, I get that you all want me to kill Rafe in this scenario," I start, trying to sound nonchalant, "but let's remember that Topper beat up JJ and Pope, and he pushed John B off the Eagle's Nest, so..." I pause dramatically. "Fuck Rafe, marry Kelce, kill Topper." I'm careful to keep my voice light, disguising any hint of truth as I say "fuck Rafe."

Before I can turn the question on JJ, John B appears, striding up the porch steps - Sarah Cameron right behind him. Her sudden presence is like a storm. One second it's just us, and then there she is, standing close to John B , her smile calm but wary.

Kiara's reaction is instant, her face going from surprise to fury in seconds. "No fucking way!" Her voice is sharp, cutting through the humid afternoon air as her gaze darts between him and Sarh. "You brought her here? So what, she's in on this now?"

JJ's face twitches in annoyance, but he keeps it cool. "Look, all I care about is that her cut comes out of your share." He points between them with a smirk.

"I gotta say, I'm just a tad uncomfortable with all of this." I say, my tone light but hiding the conflict gnawing at me.

Pope gives me a knowing grin. "When are you not uncomfortable?" he teases, a reminder of the old days before my world started tangling with Rafe Cameron.

I catch JJ looking at me with a glint of challenge in his eyes. "I dunno," I say leaning into my usual flirtation with him. "I rode here on the back of JJ's bike and it was pretty comfortable."

Kiara, though, is locked in on Sarah. She spits out a complaint, but this time Sarah stands her ground, snapping back with her own frustrations. They're both firing off at each other, tempers rising, until John B steps in, exasperated.

"Everybody shut up!" he says, running a hand through his hair."Kie, you are my best friend, right?" He turns to Sarah, chuckling softly as if he is struggling to find the words. "And Sarah, you're.." He trails off, meeting her eyes, and she looks back at him, expectant.

"Say it," Sarah murmurs, her gaze softening.

John B gives a small smile. "You're my girlfriend."

"Ooooh...that's new." I whisper, nudging JJ, who only rolls his eyes with a smirk, like he's owed a prize for calling this from the start.

But Kiara's face hardens at this revelation. "She's your girlfriend now? What was all that talk about you were just using her for information? Get a map, cut her loose."

Sarah looks hurt, but I feel a flicker of sympathy for John B, knowing how it feels to walk the line between worlds, hiding parts of yourself from the people you care about. John B is clearly defensive, but Kiara cuts him off, folding her arms.

"If she's in, then I'm out. Who's it gonna be?" She stares hard at him, daring him to choose.

John B straightens, his voice firm."Both,"

Kiara shakes her head admitting defeat, as she storms inside. Sarah lingers, visibly uncomfortable, before turning to leave too, leaving just me and the boys on the porch, the air thick with everything left unsaid.

John B heads down to the dock, probably to clear his head. Pope, glances between me and JJ, sensing something unresolved, and with an awkward wave, mutters something about a phone call and wanders off.

I look over at JJ. "So that was intense..." I start, unsure of what else to say.

JJ's eyes meet mine, the joking tone I'm used to replaced by something serious. "Tell me something, y/n," he says, his voice low, "are we going to have to endure a conversation like that again when you start bringing Rafe around?"

I give a light laugh, but I can feel the strain in it. "I don't know what you are talking about."

JJ raises an eyebrow, not buying it. "I've seen you two together, you know. The way you stopped him from almost killing me, not once, but twice. The way he looked at you when he caught us in the Twinkie last night." He sighs, and his voice softens with a vulnerability I'm not used to hearing from him. "At the risk of being slapped again, is this because we kissed? If it is, we should talk about it. We're gonna be around each other a lot, and..."

His words tug at something deep inside, but the truth is a mess I can't bring myself to unravel, not with JJ standing here, vulnerable, hopeful. He deserves more honesty than I can give him right now. I feel a pang of guilt, the weight of years of friendship mingling with the thrill of what I could have with Rafe. But even now, the words I want to say feel tangled up in everything I'm hiding.

"JJ..." I start carefully. "I stood up to Rafe, because I love you. I would do absolutely anything to protect you, you know that." I reach out, placing a hand on his arm, feeling the weight of a truth I can't admit. "As for Rafe, I don't know why he stopped, but... I'm grateful he did."

I glance over his face, looking for some hint of his thoughts, my guilt building with every second. I feel the pull toward him - the loyalty, the years of memories - but also the undeniable weight of the secrets I'm keeping. "And about our kiss," I say, ,my voice barely above a whisper. "I've been in love with you since you kissed me in that tunnel slide years ago. I don't regret it. Not one bit."

JJ's shoulders relax, his face softening as he leans in, eyes fluttering shut. I meet his lips, letting myself fall into the familiar comfort, but as our lips apart, the guilt starts to bubble up again. Here I am kissing someone who isn't Rafe. Not that Rafe and I have defined anything, but somehow that makes it worse.

JJ pulls back, looking at me with a faint smile, though there's still a flicker of worry in his gaze. "I know I said I didn't want anything serious, which is still true," he says hesitating. "But when I saw the way you were acting with Rafe I blamed myself for not being good enough for you. I thought that maybe we weren't on the same page and you were trying to get back at me."

I reach up, brushing my fingers over his cheek. "JJ, I don't want anything serious either. We are on the same page." The words feel like a half-truth, more of a distraction than a real answer.

But for now, it's enough to keep JJ close and keep the truth buried - just a little longer.