Blurry Memories (On Hold)

Chapter 3 Just for Tonight

"Nate?" I whispered, my voice cracking.

He didn't turn around.

I closed my eyes, not wanting the tears to fall.

I couldn't face him. Not after all these years, he caused me pain.

I was about to turn around and walk away but I heard Nate say my name.

"Cally." He breathed out.

I slowly turn around and see the boy who left.

He looked a lot older since middle school. His hair, which used to be bieber style, is now sticking up. I saw muscle peeking out of his shirt.

"Hey." I heard him say.

I closed my eyes.

"What are you doing here Nate." I open my eyes.

"I moved back." He said, softly.

"Why, why did you move away without telling anyone, let alone, me." I sit on a log close by, he follows.

"I-I can't tell you that." He bit his lip.

"After 4 years Nate, after 4 fucking years, you decide to just show up." I wipe the tears falling from my face.

"I'm sor-" he started. I interrupted him.

"I don't want your stupid apologies Nate! I don't want you even around me. Why exactly are you here?" I stand up from the log. He stands up too.

"You wanna know why? Because I missed my house, I missed not knowing what our high school was like, but most of all, I missed you. I missed how you laughed, how you had a small dimple when you smiled. I missed having my best friend around." He sighed at the end.

"Well guess what? I had to be without you for 4 years. I had to get out of bed and go through high school without you. My life was shit. I was a worried wreck and I cried almost every night. I got diagnosed with depression, and wanna know something else? I almost killed myself one night. So yeah, you can just say I missed you." I was out of the breath at the end.

"Maybe, we can go back to normal." He said softly.

This made me even more mad.

"You can't just barge into my life, expect me to welcome you with open arms and then everything goes back to normal! You left me Nate, you left without telling anyone." A tear went down my cheeks. "And right when my life was going smoothly, you just show up. This isn't fair! This is not fair!" I broke down crying.

He ran over to me and hugged me. He swayed us back and forth, saying soothing words into my ear.

After a little while I calmed down.

I pushed him away and walked to my favorite tree.

I started climbing it, and as soon as I got to the top, I screamed.

I screamed cuss words, I screamed I hated life, I just screamed.

And Nate was watching from the bottom.

After 10 minutes of screaming, I was finally done.

I was tired and breathless. I sat down and looked at Nate, whom has started climbing the tree.

Once he got to the top, he sat down next to me.

"You know, when I saw you, I thought it would of turned out a lot differently." He said suddenly.

"What'd you think was going to happen." I whispered, my throat hurt too much.

"I thought, that maybe you wouldn't be so mad, that you'd actually be happy to see me. I don't know, just, something else." He shook his head, "it's a stupid thought, I knew you'd be mad."

I grab his hand and examine it.

"I didn't think I would be that mad either." I admitted shyly.

"Then why were you?" He asked, intertwining our hands.

"I guess I was surprised to see you." I shrugged.

It was silent for a few minutes.

"How'd you almost kill yourself?" He asked.

I let out a sigh and looked off into the distance. I let go of his hand and pulled down my sleeve.

Down my arm were faded scars.

"That's how." I whispered, not being able to look at Nate.

He grabbed my chin and looked into my eyes.

"The scars on your skin doesn't define you." I close my eyes as his hands goes up and down my arm, tracing my scars.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you, I was scared." I laugh slightly, even though nothing was funny, "it's just, my life was finally going how I wanted. I have friends that I enjoy being around, and I have enough money to travel the world and more. I'm happy Nate. And when I saw you, I guess nothing made sense. I saw your car in your driveway, then at school, then I saw the necklace." I smile at him, "you make my life ten times for confusing then I should have been."

"I'm sorry." He said looking down in shame.

"I have an idea." I said.

"What is it?" He leaned back against the tree.

"Let's pretend you didn't leave, that we were how we were in middle school. Just for tonight. We can talk about everything else later, but right now, let's forget." I grabbed both his hands.

"Okay." He said, "okay."

We both smiled.

We leaned against the tree and looked at the stars, I didn't even realize it was that late.

"Why does time go by so fast?" I ask him, looking over to where he's sitting.

He made eye contact with me and laughed, "why such a random question?"

"I'm just wondering." I look back up.

"Well, I don't really have an answer to be honest." I laugh at his answer.

And I couldn't stop.

I held my stomach and laughed. I laughed and laughed and laughed.

And then Nate started laughing.

We were laughing so hard, that we almost fell out of the tree.

Which made us laugh even harder.

Soon we sobered up and looked into each other's eyes, laughing slightly.

"Hi." He whispered.

"Hey." I whispered back.

And just for a moment everything seemed to fall into place.