The White Rabbit

20.) Tyler and Dean

*TRIGGER WARNING* brief discussion/recounting of rape/molestation if a minor ahead

                                     ******

My eyes slowly and heavily flicker open to see a singular bright sterile white light beating down on me. I feel something in my nostrils and I bring my hand up to my face to feel oxygen tubing and I'm reminded of what happened. The fight...the fall...the baby. My eyes shoot wide open and I place my hand on my bump and it's covered in hospital machinery and an IV placed in my hand.

I look around the hospital room and it's dark and dim besides the one bright light above my bed likely because I was asleep...passed out...unconscious...whatever you want to call it. It's dead quiet with only the sound of machinery beeping with my vitals showing on all the screens and what sounds like little man's heartbeat in the background.

I glance down to see a mangled beaten down Dean with messy hair hunched over the hospital bed asleep with his black and blue face nestled near my legs. His eyes is different shades of purple, yellow, and green. His lip is busted open and grown two sizes while his nose appears to be broken. A complete heartbroken mess.

But somehow he looks peaceful and for a moment so I just leave him because I know Dean and he's going to bury himself in guilt for everything that happened tonight. Someone softly knocks at the door and enters. Dean remains asleep and I let him rest. He needs this.

"Oh hi sweetie! I'm Kathy, your nurse. I came in to update your boyfriend but since you're awake that's even better." She says with a grin.

"Uhm... so what happened?" I ask completely confused rubbing my head trying to recall what happened from the lobby to here.

"What's the last thing you remember?" She asks looking at my chart.

"The snow...the snow falling as I was being put in the ambulance. That's all I remember." I shudder reliving it.

"Oh wow. Okay. Let me catch you up. So you did experience preterm labor contractions that also led to some mild bleeding. Thankfully we were able to administer some medication to stop labor from progressing. Things are looking great and your body is reacting well to the medication. Your boyfriend knows all of this but I just wanted to come in and update him more so you can relay this to him. We're going to keep you for probably two nights for observation. Baby's heartbeat is strong and your contractions have stopped but we just want to play it safe and be sure it all progresses smoothly."Kathy says flipping through all my paperwork.

"Oh thank God..."I gasp letting the tears fall that were building in my waterline.

"Yes! It's amazing! So I'm just going to check your vitals again and baby's heartbeat then I'll be out of your hair! Visiting hours are closing in like 30 minutes so be sure to wake up Rocky Balboa here and have him head home for some rest!" Kathy chuckles while noting all my vitals before leaving.

"D-Dean..." I whisper as the nurse leaves and the door swings shut.

The sound of the door shutting startles him. Dean shoots up and stares at me for a long moment then his swollen beaten lips press into mine and he softly strokes my face.
"Audrey... H-Hey! How are you feeling? Are you okay?"He whispers softly stroking my hair.

He looks even worse awake then he did sleeping. His eyes are bloodshot with one eye having broken capillaries in the corner of his sclera.

"I'm okay. A nurse just came in with an update. How long was I out for?"I ask looking around for a clock.
"A few hours... what did the nurse say?" Dean says worriedly and stares deeply into my eyes.
"Oh wow...you must've been so worried. I'm so sorry. She just updated me and filled in the missing pieces of everything that I didn't remember. And said that they're keeping me for two nights for observation but also said everything is progressing very well." I say taking Dean's hand into mine.
"Oh that's so good to hear...God I was so worried Audj... but you shouldn't be the one apologizing...it should be me. I fucked up. I should've protected you but instead we're here because of my stupidity." Dean says allowing his emotions to bubble to the surface.
"This isn't your fault, Dean! You weren't the one who pushed me! You were protecting me. Tyler was being an ass. You-you were protecting me. I shouldn't have gotten involved." I stare squeezing his hand but he pulls it away.
"No...I shouldn't have fought him. I should've just told him to leave. I was reckless. Careless. Stupid." Dean says being completely self deprecating.
"Dean...the fight is done and over. Our son is safe. I'm okay. Any normal person would've knocked Tyler out cold for what he said." I say grabbing his hand back.
"I just-"Dean states.
"No...stop. Come here." I say moving slowly in bed over for him to sit next to me.
He listens and comes next to me and lays his head against mine. I stroke his swollen broken face. A fat lip and a black eye completely cover his face. I softly kiss his lips and he doesn't reciprocate.
"Kiss me..."I demand softly at him.
"Audrey..." he whispers fighting tears.
"Don't 'Audrey' me. I know what's going through your head and knock it off." I snap at him.
"You're not even mad at me? Not even the tiniest bit...come on Audrey. We both know this is my fault. Be mad." Dean states sitting up and looking at me.
"I'm not mad Dean...because I know your heart... and I know if the roles were reversed that I wouldn't want you to be mad at me. Mistakes happen and what's a relationship if we can't accept and forgive mistakes?" I ask placing my hand on his.
"Things could've been so much worse! How do you forgive so easily when I can't even forgive myself?" Dean states biting his lip with tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Because I'm not in your head the way you are. You've gotta forgive yourself or it'll consume you. Okay. Look...come here." I state grabbing his hand.