Magnet Love

11. Making Moves

ALEX POV:
I couldn't get my head around how she was so naive to her beauty, I'd known her for less than a week and even I had noticed the looks she got from guys in the corridors. It made my blood boil seeing their smarmy gazes as they checked her out, usually when she was oblivious to the world, with her head in a book or mid daydream.

That was another thing, I felt clueless as to what goes on in that pretty little head of hers. It's obvious that she says only a tiny percentage of what she thinks - well it's obvious to me anyway. But why didn't she trust herself to speak her mind more? She was intelligent, insanely so, and clearly had a vivid imagination - why else would she spend so much time thinking rather than speaking?

I was similar in that sense, I didn't trust people either and hated the thought of someone else in my head. Then they'd truly see how messed up I am. But Lily doesn't have a past like mine, she can't have - yet I still get the impression that she is hiding within herself.

She was too good for me, that's for sure. Too gentle, pure and dare I say it - fragile. As much as I couldn't want anything less, I would probably eventually end up hurting her and I can't bear to see her upset. I want to be the person always to hold her when she cries, reassure her when she is lost and share in her joy and laughter, but I would be selfish to allow myself to. She deserves better. Far better, and yet I still can't stay away.

After my revelation of my attraction to her, Lily shied even more than usual, overthinking my words. I didn't mean to scare her but I needed to explain why I had become such a prominent feature to her life so suddenly, and why I had no intentions of leaving any time soon. We finished our milkshakes and I then paid the bill and drove her home in the comfortable silence we were accustomed to.

As I pulled round the corner into Chester Drive, Lily's house came into view and I parked up on the sidewalk. If I didn't say something soon, I was worried that Lily would just leave and I would never actually know what she felt, or if I had scared her off with what I said in the diner.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable before, I just, I need you to know that I like you Lily" I stuttered, looking at her hopefully and mentally crossing my fingers that she wasn't going to run away.

"I like you too" I heard her whisper. In shock I twisted my neck and stared at her, looking down at her lap and twisting her fingers again, showing my her nerves. Her smooth cheeks were flushed red and her rosy lips parted as she forced herself to speak again.

"But I'm scared". This caused my heart to drop, so I had frightened her? Surely not, she hadn't ever seen a dark side of me.

"It's not you that I'm afraid of" she began, causing me to sigh internally in relief "I'm just scared I'll get hurt. If I let myself like you, I'm setting myself up for pain when it goes wrong, and that's not me saying that you will do anything wrong - it's just me. Bad luck follows me and I don't know if I could handle any more heart ache".

This statement caused my mind to race. 'Any more heart ache'. What had she been through? I could see the pain in her hazel eyes, brimming with tears. I couldn't leave her like this, she wasn't afraid of me, just afraid of the state I would leave her in, but I refused to give in.

I took my hands to the sides of her face and held her focus on me. We studied each other in silence for a moment before my heart clouded my judgement and I placed my lips upon hers, leaving a sweet and gentle kiss. She was just as shocked as I was, but gave in and leaned her forehead against my chin as I engulfed her small body in my embrace - so tight that I could feel the hummingbird beat of her heart.

"Give me a chance Lil" I whispered. It was selfish of me, but she was a magnet and too strong. She nodded against my chest and broke free of my embrace to meet my eyes again.

"Thank you for tonight" she spoke softly, before leaning in, kissing my cheek gently and exiting the car. Normally I would have walked her to her door, but I was frozen in my seat and so instead I watched to make sure she made it inside safely. She turned, leaving me with a sweet smile before stepping into the comfort of her home and closing the front door.

That was it. She had trusted me not to break her and I now had my side of the deal to keep and make sure I caused her no pain. I had to make sure that she was never exposed to the harsh realities of my life. Putting myself into dangerous situations was one thing, but I couldn't risk Lily being hurt by it or it scaring her away.

I couldn't lose her now. She was quiet to everyone else, but she had come into my life like an explosion and I was shocked at how quickly I had become infatuated with her. Her beauty, intelligence, witty humour and gentle soul. I wanted her to be mine.