Mike On Presentation
Nah kid, that's wrong, they're too runny. You didn't cook them long enough either. Sure it tastes good, but that don't mean anything if it aint presented in a manner that looks appetizing. See what I made for table 4? Those crisp, golden edges but with an obvious softness on the interior? The powdered sugar on the French toast? Mike nailed it! Now don't get me wrong, Mike dresses like a slob usually. That's fine a lot of the time, but there's exceptions. Like that one time Mike got caught for public urination and ended up in the drunk tank! Sure Mike could of worn his old work clothes, beat up sneakers and stained hat, but Mike is on probation! What? That's not important! What's important is Mike knew he had to duck this, really squirm out of it. So he got himself a haircut and borrowed one of Larry's dress shirts and told the judge he was really sorry. That judge is a real ball buster ya know? Him and I have a history! But I looked the part, looked clean, had a haircut and I said I was sorry. I looked the part so the judge basically told him to fuck off and not to do it again. Mike wouldn't have got away with it if he hadn't visited Larry, thats why ya gotta present yourself! Look the part! Mike is a great guy, but like those eggs if he didn't look the part he would of been bawled out! Sometimes it's like that kid, you gotta conform to people's expectations, you gotta present them to what they really want to see. Ya gotta bullshit them. Shit, sometimes you even have to fake it to keep your ass out of the pokie. That's just life kid, those eggs could be delicious but if it looks like cardboard no one's going to eat it, same with you, same with anyone. Now, Mike aint suggesting that you go out and lie all the time! Some people have a real nose for it, especially women. They can smell that bullshit a mile away, but they still appreciate the effort a lot of times. Mike doesn't know much about that though. Alright, enough screwin around, Mike needs that toast stat!
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The Mike Lectures
HumorA series of humorous, insightful and one sided rants by a middle aged chef named Mike at a small cafe. Mike's foil is a mostly quiet young man (around 21) known simply as "the kid" who is experiencing growing pains in the harsh light of modern soci...
