Stories that I get from ToolBaz

Red vs Blue and their Servants

Setting: A makeshift headquarters in the middle of a battlefield, pockmarked with craters and scattered debris. The members of the Reds and Blues sit around a large table, a holographic projection of the Fate/Grand Order emblem flickering in the center.

Church: Alright, everyone, we need to figure out what kind of Servants we would summon if we ever get dragged into this Fate/Grand Order mess.

Tucker: Servants? You mean like the kind of servants that would cook my breakfast? Because I could really use one of those.

Caboose: I want a giant robot! They’re never sad, and they can help carry stuff!

Washington: I think, wanting a Servant like that might ruin the point of summoning one. You generally want someone with skills in battle or strategy.

Carolina: You mean something like a warrior? I could definitely work with a Berserker-type. Just don’t summon one that goes insane. I have enough trouble keeping my team in line.

Sarge: I need someone heroic, an inspiration! How about Alexander the Great? He could teach us a thing or two about charge tactics!

Grif: Yeah, and then what? Follow him into battle just to get our butts handed to us? No thanks. I’d go for a support Servant, maybe one that can amplify my magic or something.

Simmons: Actually, I think I’d rather summon a clever Lancer, like Cu Chulainn. He’s got those cool spears and his history is impressive. Plus, he suffered a tragic fate! You know, like us.

Donut: I just want someone fabulous! I’m thinking Gilgamesh! Just imagine the style points!

Lopez: ¡No puede ser! A Servant like Gilgamesh would probably spend half the time talking about his ‘treasures’ and annoying me!

Doc: And I’d prefer something practical. Maybe summon a healer. Someone like Medea could be useful.

Tucker: Nobody invited the “downer,” Doc. We’re talking about epic battles here, not a medical convention.

Church: Okay, let’s be real. If anything, I’d summon someone really strategic, like Jeanne d’Arc. She’d actually help us out in a fight instead of just sitting around.

Caboose: But I want someone to rescue me, not just for fighting! How about someone with magical powers that can make everything fun?

Carolina: Fun? You do realize this is a war, right?

Grif: Who’s going to care about having fun when we could just find a way to cheat death? I’d summon someone who’s got a knack for coming back, like Hercule...

Washington: ...Hercules wasn’t about coming back; he was all about being a demigod.

Sarge: Excellent! That’s exactly the kind of Servant we need! One that’s practically immortal! Just like us!

Tucker: Well, I say we set up a lottery system and pray that we don’t end up with someone like... like…

Doc: An average Joe?

Tucker: No! I was thinking more like a Servant with a giant moon staff that thinks we’re just some kind of minions!

Caboose: Hey! I’d love a minion!

Church: Focus, guys! I’m serious. We need to figure this out, or else we might end up summoning… I don’t know… a Servant that just endlessly quotes Shakespeare.

Grif: Please, let’s not make this any worse.

Washington: Right. Let's aim for someone who can actually help us win.

Sarge: Then it's settled! Time to pull up the Servants’ charts and figure out which ones we can summon!

Simmons: Can we at least start with a list of who we shouldn’t summon first?

Tucker: Agreed. No weird moon staff-wielders, please.

As the team bickers and makes their choices, the holographic projection begins to spin faster, showcasing images of legendary heroes becoming more vivid. The crew is left debating, joking, and increasingly excited at the prospect of their next big adventure.

Caboose: Ooh! Can I have a pet dragon!?

Tucker: This is going to take a while, isn’t it?

Church: You have no idea…