hiccup ➳ lashton au ☑️

Chapter 16

Dedication to everyone who asked questions for the character ask! it was really fun to answer them, so thank you so much! 🙊 [a/n I forgot to put the 👉🏻-👈🏻 for when ashton hiccups, just imagine it. I was to lazy.]

It's been a week since Ashton's Birthday, which means it's been a week since him and Luke made their relationship official. It's been going quite well, even though Luke still hasn't talked to his mother about them being together for real. As far as Luke knows, Liz still thinks he's straight. Well, Liz never thought Luke was straight but after Luke snapped at her, her perspective changed. Or so Luke thought. Liz still does think Luke is gay and that he likes Ashton. Luke doesn't know it, but Liz already knows there is something already going on between the pair. Liz thinks they're perfect for each other.

Ashton clearly makes Luke happy and she didn't understand how Luke didn't realise that before. When Luke took Ashton out a week ago, Luke told Liz that it was just because it was Ashton's birthday and he wanted to do something nice. Liz went along with it but knew better. Luke cared for Ashton and Liz hoped that he would tell her if they were together or not. Liz had thought about questioning him about it but decided against it. If her accusation was wrong, he could get upset. He was already going through a rough patch at the moment and that was understandable. Liz just didn't want to make it any worse by saying the wrong things.

She actually thought Luke had depression, however, when she took Luke to a doctor he assured her that he was just having a difficult time dealing with their loss and to just book him into therapy sessions. He's already had two sessions and whenever Liz asks him about it, he talks for a little while and then changes the subject. Luke finds that when he talks about it, he starts thinking about Jack and he would rather not. It's not that Luke doesn't want to remember Jack, he's just still at the stage where when someone brings him up or when he thinks about it, he gets upset.

Ashton and Luke made their way towards the music room. It was the day they were doing their performance and Ashton was freaking out. As they reached the room, their were people already doing their performances and Ashton's palms began to sweat. He tried not to act nervous because he wanted to prove to himself that he wouldn't let his stupid hiccups ruin this for him. He was planning on singing, and when he comes to think of it; he didn't know why. He can't sing with hiccups, he didn't even know why he thought he could in the first place.

Ashton's breathing became uneasy as he walked back out of the class room and leaned against the wall. Luke noticed and quickly walked back out of the room, seeing Ashton with his eyes squeezed shut and looked as though he was having a panic attack. Ashton doesn't usually have panic attacks, they're not common to him. Luke's learnt that they only happen when he works himself up over something. Luke lightly placed his hand on Ashton's hip, making the boy flinch and quickly took it back off.

"Love, what's wrong?" Luke asked and Ashton bit his lip to hold back his tears.

"I-I can't - do this," Ashton spoke with trembling lips and Luke took his hand in his, intertwining their fingers and took him towards the bathroom.

When they got inside, Luke took him into the same stall that they both go in when they're sad. Luke closed the stall door and slid down it, grabbing Ashton's large hands and pulling him onto his lap from where he had sat on the toilet seat. Ashton's back was pressed against Luke's chest and the blonde wrapped his arms around his torso. Luke pressed light kisses to the back of Ashton's neck and Ashton just felt so defeated. His hiccups were making him feel as though he couldn't do anything. It's times like these when Ashton really hated himself. Why him? Why was he the one to have consistent hiccups? What did he ever do to deserve this.

As Ashton thought about how he would have to put up with his hiccups for the rest of his life, a thought came to mind. Maybe he doesn't have to suffer, maybe he can just end it. Why would anyone want to put up with never ending hiccups for the rest of their lives? There's nothing anyone can do to fix it so why not just end it? Ashton let the tears fall free when realising what he was thinking. He didn't want to be this way, the darkness was slowly grabbing a hold of him and pulling him under. He can't die, he can't do that to Luke. Wait. Luke wants to die to. Ashton quickly scrambled away from Luke, not really having much room since they were in a stall, but their was still a little bit.