Luke Hemmings - Roommates

Dear Kenzie

The music flowed through my ears as I stood alone on the grass soaking up the sunshine and watching the various people as the reminisce about my husband, friend and lover. I heard somebody walking up behind me and just assumed it was one of the boys until they spoke and it was a voice I didn't know. "Are you Miss McKenzie Murray."

"Mrs McKenzie McKenna." I corrected turning to face the young man who nodded at me reaching into his back pocket.

"I was told to give you this." I took it from him not even getting a chance to ask what it is or even to say thank you before he was walking off again. I looked at the white envelope that had been folded in half opening it up to look at familiar messy handwriting. My hand shook a little as I took out a piece of folded A4 paper leaving another piece still in the envelope. My eyes scanned over the page taking in each and every word carefully.

Dear Kenzie,

If you're reading this then I am dead. I'm sorry for leaving you when I always promised I wouldn't. Remember when we were fourteen and sat under that old, oak tree talking about our funerals. We were both so sure that you would be the one to die first and although I never admitted this, it broke my heart to think like that. We each made a promise to write a eulogy for the other and true to my word I have written a eulogy. I just wish I could have been there to read it to you.

Before you read the eulogy there are a few things I need to say first. Number one, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all of the shit you've been through in life and I'm sorry that I'm no longer there to help you through it all. Just remember that I'm still up there, or down I'm not quite sure where I'm heading yet, watching over you. I will be behind you every step of the way to catch you if you fall. I'm sending you the purest and whitest dove I can find.

Secondly, the person who gave you this letter is Paul. He's my cousin and when you have finished reading this go and talk to him. He's a  very good listener and I can assure you he's not judgemental at all. If you need a shoulder to cry on he's your guy.

Thirdly, I have had this written since that day when we were fourteen years old so sorry if it sucks. I wanted to write it that same night  because there was so much in my  fourteen year old brain that I was worried wouldn't be there when I decided to write it if not that very same night. That's why there may be some stuff in there that you are wondering why I didn't put in. Well, that's exactly why.

Finally, I love you. I wish I was still there beside you to feel the warmth of your body pressed up against mine just one more time. I wish we could have one more night to dance together in the rain under a moon-lit sky. I want just one more day with you to tell you everything will be alright and you'll get over me eventually. You were always the strong one Kenzie you can make it through this. You were my best friend and lover all in one and I hope I grew a pair and managed to tell you that before I died. I love you and just remember if you ever miss me, I'll be waiting at that old oak tree.

Love from Blake x

I hesitated slightly, trying to decided whether or not I wanted to read my eulogy or just leave it for when I was dead. Then again if he hadn't of wanted me to read it then he would have asked his cousin to keep it until after I was dead. I just don't think I could handle it right now. I put the letter away and slipped the envelope into my bag before scouting out Paul. I found him sat by the river by himself and when he caught me looking at him he smiled and waved me over. I found my feet carrying me over there smiling straight back at him. "Hello Mrs McKenna."

"Please, call me Kenzie." He reached his hand over to me and I shook it courteously before taking the spare seat next to him.

"You gave a lovely eulogy today." He commented taking a sip from his drink.