13 ~ The First Hug of warmth & tears

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It's a gloomy evening

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It's a gloomy evening

Quite cloudy and dark.

I have arrived university way too early in hyper excitement of his class.

He has promised that he'll teach something new, something different and I can't bubble down my happiness.

But I think I've reached her too much early since nobody is present here.

I don't know what occurs to me but I decide to take a walk around the backyard of the university.

The area is quite secluded here devoid of any crowd.

I breathe deeply, savoring the fresh air, letting my mind slowly unclench from the knots of study stress that has taken hold over the past few days.

The area is so lovely but it has already become quite dark this side.

Maybe I should go to his office room and wait there.

As I turn around the corner, I notice a plume of smoke rising in the distance.

At first, I don't think much of it maybe due to pollution

But as I move a little closer, the scent of burning materials and dust fills my nostrils,

The smoke grows thicker, it's swirling higher and higher.

Smoke !

Darkness !

These two are my staunch enemies, they plunges me into shadows of nightmares.

Construction work is underway near the old lecture hall, and the sound of machines and hammers echoes through .

Calm down , I try to cajole myself.

I slow down my steps but my breath catches in my throat as I stare at the billowing smoke.

I know it's happening again.

My anxiety attack, it will hit me soon.

So I try my first hand techniques to steady myself

"Okay, it's just construction," I mutter to myself, trying to sound calm.

"It's not a fire. There's nothing to panic about."

But my heart begins to race, and my palms grow sweaty.

I hate hate dark, smoky places-they reminds me of a hazy nightmare.

Something flashes in my mind, and suddenly, the present feels like the past. The smoke seems to close in around me making it hard to breathe.

"No, no, no," I whisper, my voice trembling.

"I'm okay. I'm okay . Everything is fine " I pat over my chest with trembling hands.

What will I do now !

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