The New Student

Conflicted

"Wow Mari," Johnny breathed after we had finished kissing. "Have you done this before?" 

"No," I whispered.

"I'm one lucky guy."

I shrugged and looked over at Hansol and Nina's table only to see Hansol leaving and Nina desperately trying to stop him from leaving. Hansol slammed the door closed and angrily marched out. 

"Who was that?" Johnny asked.

I shrugged nonchalantly, continuing to eat my almost-melted ice cream. 

I continued to date Johnny through my freshman and sophomore years. Thankfully, Johnny and his crew, besides Hansol, took care of me really well, and I remained safe from the crazy girls. I think I started to like Johnny, but every time I saw Hansol, bitter feelings returned. Now it was in the middle of my junior year, prom season. 

"Mari, you make my dark night starry, so will you be my star at prom?" Johnny smiled at me, proud of his poster that he made me. I laughed and ran forward to hug him. 

"Yes! I love the poster!" It was indeed very beautiful; Johnny had put a lot of work into it. 

He leaned down and kissed me goodnight, leaving me. My smile faded as I looked at the poster again. Johnny really liked me, so it was difficult for me to reject his feelings. I was so conflicted! For two years, I had stayed by his side because he liked dating me. It wasn't like the two years were awful, but I just felt so wrong. I knew that I wasn't going to be able to love him and return his feelings for me because I already had someone else in my heart. Hansol.

That night, I had a nightmare. Johnny was proposing to me, asking me to marry him, but I couldn't respond. I wanted to say no and apparently my eyes gave my true feelings away. Then Johnny turned dark as did his crew. 

"You lied to me!" He yelled at me, his eyes dark and piercing.

"You liar!" The boys chanted, ominously walking towards me.

"Well, well. Johnny it seems like your girlfriend has been lying to you this whole time. Why don't you just come back to me instead?" Jess' voice echoed in my mind and dark shadows wrapped around Johnny's body. "Johnny, come back!" Jess' face appeared behind him, her body cloaked in the dark shadows. "Come back to me!" She howled and I woke up, panting. 

"Oh no," I whispered to myself. "What am I going to do?" I shoved my head into the pillow, sobbing as the tears streamed down, only stopping when I fell asleep from exhaustion.