Hate To Love You

15

~🌹Elora🌹~

The silence in my room felt heavier than usual.

I had barely slept. Every time I closed my eyes, the memories came rushing back—the hands grabbing at me, the panic clawing at my chest, the feeling of complete helplessness and worst of all the thoughts that had gone through my mind. Even though I knew I was safe now, my body refused to believe it.

I'd spent most of the night staring at the ceiling, listening to the faint sounds of the house, desperately trying to convince myself that I could just push this away like I had done with everything else in my life.

But the fact that the memories were at the forefront of my mind, so painfully seared into my memory proved the fact that this  wasn’t something I could just ignore.

A soft knock at the door made me flinch, shocking me out of my thoughts.

"Elora?"

Sophia.

I swallowed, forcing myself to sit up as the door cracked open. She peeked inside, her expression gentle but concerned.

"Hey, sweetheart. Can I come in?"

I nodded hesitantly, the argument of the day they'd explained their absences long buried deep.

I pulled  my blanket around me as she stepped inside and closed the door behind her. She was still in her sleepwear, her blonde hair tied up in a loose bun, and for a moment, I felt guilty that I'd made her worried enough to come find me first thing in the morning.

She settled hesitantly on the edge of my bed, carefully accessing me, probably trying to find something that told her she wasn't welcome but I made no action to reassure her or otherwise.

A moment passed and she reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"You didn’t come down for dinner last night," she said sofly. "And you barely said a word when you got home from school. I know something’s wrong, Elora. Please talk to me." She said.

My eyes wandered around the room, looking at everything but her before they settled on my lap, my fingers twisting the edge of my blanket.

"It’s nothing." I said.

She sighed. "Sweetheart, you don’t have to pretend with me. Look, I know it doesn't seem like it but I see you. We may not have been available but we are now. I saw the way you looked when you walked through that door yesterday. You were shaken."

At her words, my throat tightened.

I wanted to tell her she was wrong, that I was fine, that I had just been tired, and she was overthinking things. Just like I've always done.

But the moment I looked up and saw the warmth in her eyes, the wall I had been desperately trying to keep up cracked.

"Something happened," I slowly admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.

Sophia’s expression didn’t change, but I saw the way her body tensed slightly, as if she was bracing herself.

"Okay," she said, voice steady. "Are you willing to tell me or should I get your dad?"

I hesitated, my fingers curling into fists.

If I said it out loud, it would become real.

But it was already real wasn't it?

I took a shaky breath. "It was terrible."

Sophia didn’t say a word to interrupt, just listened as I slowly unraveled the story, turning into a sobbing mess.