She's Fearless

Chapter 5

The house got really quiet after noon, I think everyone was either outside or in their own bedroom. So now is the best time to sneak downstairs, grab some food then run back to my room.

I never came out of my room after the whole thing in the kitchen this morning with Louis, Liam and I. And since I never ate breakfast I'm actually starving.

Shit

Some one is on the kitchen, I heard a cabinet door shut when I got half way down the stairs.

Oh fucking great, it's Louis
(Like I've said before, please note my sarcasm because its not a great thing that it is Louis.)

I'm just going to ignore him. Like he ignored me.

I went to the fridge and looked there for something but really nothing looks good. All there is is a bunch of junk food and Harry's nasty kale shake things. Onto the cabinets...oh god he's looking at me. Ignore him. He is an asshole. okay, cereal, cereal, canned stuff, ah-ha pop-tarts. And they are even the good kind. Chocolate.

"Sorry about earlier, Ali. I was being immature." he spoke.

"Yeah, and I'm not sorry I tried to pound your face into the counter." dammit Ali, you are supposed to be ignoring him. 

"You know, we can at least try to have a conversation like normal people."

"I tried that and you chose to be your childish asshole self and ignore me."

"And I apologized for it!"  he yelled at me.

"Don't yell at me you'll make everyone come down here." and then no one can hold me back from almost killing you again...

"They all went to the store to get more food." his voice returned to a normal level. "Look, maybe if we just sit down, like adults, and talk about things, we can make this whole time here not so bad."

"Yeah, I don't think so." I opened my package of pop-tarts and took a bite of one.

"Ali, come on. This time is going to be miserable for everyone if we are going to be fighting all the time."

"And what exactly do you want to talk about Louis? Huh?"

"I don't know... I just don't want to be fighting with you all the time." he shrugged. We both took a minute to just look at each other. I couldn't read is emotions again. and its pissing me off. Just being around him is pissing me off. 

"If you want to talk, fine. Let's talk. Why didn't you marry Carla?" it was a harsh way to start things but I needed to hear the answer form him and not what Liam said.

"She told me something before the wedding that I didn't want in my life and it freaked me out. So I panicked, and I ran out." 

"What?" I wanted to know but he just shook his head no. "Tell me. Please."

"Only if you answer a question of mine?"

"Fine." I finished the first pop-tart and stared on the second.

"Why did you end it with me?"

And now I'm choking on my pop-tart.

"You okay?" He asked me when my coughing fit ended.

"Yeah." I coughed once more and poured a glass of water.

"Are you going to answer?"

"Yeah, no. I don't need to know why that bad."

"Really Ali? I deserve an explanation." He started to raise his voice. "You dumped me after a two year relationship and never said why. And the sad part was you didn't even have the decency to do it in person. You left me fucking text message. Which is sad and pathetic. So I think I deserve a reason why."

"No." Was all I could really say.

"Also I want to know what happened to the real Ali? Why did you go back to all your old ways? I mean, you worked really hard to stop the partying and all but...I just want to know."

"Somethings are better left unanswered, okay? Just live with it." I tried my best not to raise my voice at him. He wanted an adult conversation and that's what I am going to try to do.

"I just..."

"Want to know?" I finished his trialed off thoughts considering he's said it twenty times in one conversation.

"Yeah."

"And just so you know, this is the real Ali. Piercings and crazy haired Ali."

"Then who exactly did I love three years ago?"

I slightly gagged on the word love when it fell from his mouth.

"A girl who was desperate and willing to do anything to go home." 

"So you're saying it was all an act?" I didn't have the heart to answer him. "For two years?" he's making it harder and harder for me to answer.

"I..."

"I just want an answer Ali. It's been killing me. When you got here all I wanted to do was yell at you and ask you why you put me through all that pain and-"

"I cheated on you." rip it off like a band-air right? "I slept with someone then realized I had feelings for them so I broke it off with you, to be with them. I thought it would be better then lead him on only for him to find out I had a boyfriend." 

Harsh, I know. But honesty is the best policy... and he slightly deserved it. I mean, he did it to me so... 

"Wow...can't believe you just said that." he ran his hand through his hair. "You know what, let's go back to the ignoring each other thing because I don't ever want to fucking talk to you again." he got up from the bar stool and went out the back door to the pool area.