I Will Always Come Home to You (Ally and Stevie)

19. A Fan Kissed My Girlfriend (Stevie said)

My girlfriend and I drove to Granny's house on Saturday. I was so excited to introduce the most special women in my life to each other--but, my girlfriend was obviously nervous.

"Stevie, what should we talk about? I do not want to bore her. Does she like gardening? I do not know anything about cooking so we better talk about gardening. Oh gosh, how do I look? How old is she again? Her hometown is in Louisiana, right? I will google whether the governor there is Republican or Democrat. It said Republican. What do the Republicans stand for again? I should have listened to Mrs. Anderson and not doodled lyrics for my crush in high school. But at least everything's in the internet now. What if she doesn't like me? Okay, I will not think about it. Relax, Ally. Relax. Wait, are we playing bridge later? Please correct me if I get the order of the suits wrong—spades, hearts, diamonds and clubs. I think I got them in order. Did you check if we got her presents in the trunk?"

Imagine Ally blitzing all that in just thirty seconds with occasional pausing for checking her face on the mirror and searching the internet. She was also driving. Repeat the cycle a thousand times and that exactly describes our trip. She was stressing too much and it was really funny.

"She already likes you, Ally," I assured her. "Can you try breathing normally for a sec?"

"I do not want to ruin it. I want it to be perfect. I know how much you love her," Ally explained. "We both know I have an irresistible charisma with the ladies but I am not sure if my enchantment goes beyond the thirty-year old and plus population. Ha-ha."

"It will be perfect."

We arrived at half past eleven. As I got off the car, I could smell Granny's gumbo simmering outside the house.

"Granny, we're here!" I said as I excitedly entered the backdoor. I know she always leaves it open for me and my brother, Clay.

"There is my girl!" Granny said as she welcomed me with her big and warm embrace. "Is this the fine lady you were talking about?"

"This is Ally, by the way. She is my girlfriend. Ally, meet my Granny."

"I am very pleased to meet you, Ma'am," Ally said formally.

"Call me Granny," Granny said and gave Ally a tight hug to Ally's surprise. "You are as pretty as Stevie described. But why are you both so skinny? Aren't dates supposed to be for eating? Just sit there and I will feed you both."

Ally and I shared a laugh because we haven't had a proper date. Her face finally lightened up. I helped Granny in the kitchen while Ally was only allowed to watch. Ally has a series of kitchen mishaps and the most recent was the fire she caused when she was just fixing us SANDWICHES.

The three of us had a sumptuous lunch. Granny talked about the embarrassing and aggressive years of my childhood—my stint in the debate and track teams, how I loved arguing especially with teachers, how I am undefeated in bridge, the time I hit Clay's classmate because he punched my brother, the time I lost a tooth because I fell off the bike chasing a thief and lots more—Ally was listening attentively. I was sure she was saving up information to use against me later on because I still tease her about her embarrassing stories.

Ally told Granny about how her career started and how it was intertwined with our story—of course setting aside the drama and the spice.

"You should let me hear you sing before my ears start to fail," Granny told Ally.

"I would love to, Granny," Ally replied. "But I am afraid I may be the one who impairs your hearing. Ha-ha."

We were having drinks on the porch. Granny and Ally were discussing gardening when Clay finally arrived.