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Oct. 22 Thursday

Mallory had been in this trance for two days now, she was confused. Mallory would just and think, try to come up some explanation. What was aunt Becky talking about? Why is my dad back? What did Calie know, was she apart of their whole scheme too? All these questions hunted Mallory's head. She tried to keep her thoughts calm but anxiety got the best of her, tainting her thoughts with the worst.

Mallory was sitting her bath tub, trying to gain some kind of sanity but it wasn't working. Running her hands in the water, letting the cool water do its magic. She sat in the tub walling in her thoughts. The silence is violent and killing me. Mallory thought, she hated the silence and the way her mind would travel to the dark and dangerous side. With everything going on with Mallory, her mind would be a war zone. Mallory laid back in the tub so just her head was above water, slowly with every breath she sank into the water. Keeping her eyes closed, she let her mind go blank.

Mallory quickly pulled her head up from being under water as she was losing her breath. As she was gripping on to the sides of the tub trying to regain her breath, a horrid thought came to mind. Why not just end it all? "I can't. I can't ." she quickly shook that thought out of her head and brought her knees to her bare chest. Shaking her head she repeated those words. Mallory got up and out of the bath tub, getting dressed she walked over to her bed.

Mallory threw her head back in frustration, gripping her hair in anger and grief. She let out a mellow sigh. "My whole life is a lie!" Mallory shouted out not caring who heard. Mallory laid on her bed just staring at the ceiling, she looked to her right at her nightstand at her empty pill bottle. Mallory finished it off yesterday. Hoping that an overdose would finish her but it didn't, it did absolutely nothing. For awhile all that was heard was silence, then Mallory's soft hushed whimpers. It soon escalated to full out crying and rough struggled breaths. Mallory sat up and cried into her hands, she horrid mess right now. But all that stopped at the sound of her door opening. Mallory quickly brought her head up to see who was there.

"Ted?" quickly Mallory stood up and wiped away the remainder of her tears, trying to look somewhat presentable. "What are you doing here?"

"Your aunt let me in before she left with this man and I was just-"

"My dad." Mallory cut Ted off as she sat on her bed, back in sadden state by the mention of her father.

Ted was confused as what she meant "Your dad?" her asked.

"Yeah the man she left with was...well is my dad."

"Oh." it was all Ted had to say.

Ted was taken back by Mallory's state, never in a million years did he think that he would see Mallory ever so broken. It foreign to him. He's never been the helping type, the one there when someone was at their worst. He had grown up with false reality of life, didn't expect to deal with sad situations.

Ted and Mallory were in silence, awkwardly shifting gazes and fumbling with the sleeves of their sweaters. Mallory had enough of the cringing silence and was beginning to shake. She got up and walked over to her nightstand and grabbed her empty bottle. Ted's stomach turned as he saw the bottle in her hands. Mallory turned to face Ted, shaking the bottle in her hand.

"Do you have anymore? I...kind of ran out." Mallory asked Ted, rocking back and forward on her heels.

Ted slowly shook his head, walking up to Mallory. "I don't think you need anymore Mal."

"Mal? Really?" Mallory scoffed.

"Well yeah a nickname." Ted gave Mallory a half smile, Mallory just rolled her eyes in response.

"Teddy I don't care what you think,I know what I need and right what I need is more pills. I'm going through a lot so it would help to have something to take the edge off." Mallory spoke crossing her arm in defense.

"I get that Mallory I really do but what you need is someone to talk to not numb your feelings with drugs, trust me it's not going to work."

"Trust you!" Mallory shouted at Ted "You don't even know me and I don't know you!"

Ted tried to reason with Mallory as she got closer to Ted every vile word she spoke. Mallory was standing directly in front of Ted, she grabbed him by his collar bringing his face closer towards hers.

"Ted do not come in here with that trust me bullshit! You do not know what it is like to have your life be a lie. To truly realize that you have no one, that you are left to fend for yourself! No you don't have to deal with that, you have your mommy and your daddy to take of you. To feed you lies and make sure that everything will go your way, that life is just a walk in the park." Mallory let go of Ted's collar and walked away. With her back turned towards him she let out frustrated sigh. "Life is not like that, nothing in reality will ever be."

Ted straighten himself out after his surprising assault. "Mallory I know you don't mean any of that-"

"I do." she interrupted.

"No you're just under a lot stress and-"

"Nothing! You know nothing! If you don't have any pills to give me then leave."

"Mallory I was just trying to be a friend...I-"

"A friend." Mallory quickly turned around and took quick steps towards to Ted.

"Go!" she pushed Ted out of her doorway and into the hallway "Just leave!" and with that Mallory slammed the door in Ted's face.

Mallory backed up to the door and slid down against it. she ran her fingers threw her hair, Mallory started to cry while repeating the words "I can't" over and over again.



Thank you for still reading even after my reallyyy slow updates...YOU ARE THE BEST!!!!!!!

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p.s school is really kicking my butt and it doesn't help when you're distracted with the feels...





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