void | titans

11

tw: thoughts of self harm & suicide.

RYAN SAT ON THE LEDGE OF THE roof, her feet slowly swaying back and forth. Her eyes stared down at the ground, a hundred stories below her.

She pondered about what would happen if she ' slipped. ' Would anything even happen to her? Would the impact of the hard concrete leave bruises and lacerations behind or would she just wake up a little sore the next day?

She always wondered how much her body could take. How much pain would it have to go through before succumbing to its injuries.

How much pain she was suppose to handle?

" I'm fine, Gar. " She spoke, a sigh escaping her lips. Those thoughts being pushed out of her head.

" How did you know it was me? " He asked, releasing an awkward chuckle.

" I could tell by the way your footsteps sounded. " She responded, her eyes moving from the ground to the building across from her.

" Ryan, " he breathed out, walking up and leaning on the ledge next to her. " I am so sorry, okay? For what I said earlier, and for not telling you about what Jason was planning and if I could go back and change it, I would. I swear, I had no idea it would end up like this."

" I know. " She said, her eyes moving to meet his.

He looked so remorseful, and sad. Like a puppy that had been kicked.

" I know that you're sorry, and I know you didn't mean for any of this to happen and I know that the guilt you are feeling is eating you alive, okay? I know. "

Gar fell silent at her words, just staring back into her eyes. She looked exhausted, like the world was starting to drain her from the inside out.

He was just at such a loss. He didn't know how to make the situation better.

" I'm just- " Ryan sucked in a breath. " I'm just so scared, okay? And I don't know how to handle feeling like this. Jason is... he's my best friend. He was the first person that really saw me, ya'know? Like from the moment we met, he just...he saw me. "

Her hand quickly swiped away a tear that had begun to slide down her cheek.

" And, uh, now he is out there with Doctor Light and Deathstroke and I can't do anything to help him because we have no idea where he is. "

" They will find him. " Gar reassured. " Okay? We will find him. "

" I know we will. " She paused for a moment. " I'm just worried we'll be too late when we do. "

At her words Dick appeared from behind the rooftop door. " Meeting in the kitchen. I think you guys should be apart of it. "

THE OLD AND NEW TITANS had all moved to the kitchen.

The adults were surrounding the kitchen island while Gar, Raven and Ryan had found their own separate corners to stand in.

" Hank was right. " Dick stated. " You were all right. Jason needs us, we can't just stand here and do nothing. Death stroke wants to make a trade, so we make a trade. "

" We can't hand over Rose. " Hank retorted, seemingly changing his mind on the matter.

Ryan wanted to let out a scoff at his sudden change of mind. If it really came down between Jason, and some girl she barely knew?

She wouldn't even have to consider it. Rose would be out the door.

It baffled her that no one else felt the same.

" No, we can't. We won't. " Dick confirmed. " But I have an idea. " He added, holding up a small remote. " Gar and Rachel, you stay here with Rose. Protect the tower. I'll contact Deathstroke, confirm our meet up at the plaza. Then we will take him down, once and for all. Together. "

" Alright, let's get ready to go. " Hank said, clapping his hands together.

Everyone went off in their own directions, to get ready for the battle that was about to take place.

" Hey. " Ryan called out, reaching out to gently grab Dick's wrist. " You only said Gar and Rachel, where does that leave me? "

" Every part of my body wants me to tell you to stay here. To guard the tower, but more importantly, be somewhere I know you're safe. " Dick sighed.

" But, I would be lying if I said your powers wouldn't be immensely helpful against Deathstroke. Also, I have a feeling you would just follow me anyway and ruin my plan. So, I thought I would just get ahead of you. "

The two shared a chuckle, before the air thickened. The seriousness of their situation crashing down on them once again.

Dick pulled her into a tight a hug.

" We got this. We will get him back. "

Ryan hugged him back, burying her head in his shoulder. " I know you will. " She pulled back from him, her eyes staring intently into his. " I trust you. "

Her words hit him like a ton of bricks.

Ryan never said those words carelessly, and she had not said them to him since he left her in Gotham.

" Let's get suited up. " He gave a quick smile, the pair separating. " Meet back here in ten. "

RYAN LACED UP HER BOOTS, sucking in a deep breath.

She stared at her reflection, her dark hair pulled into a tight ponytail and her black mask was covering the top half of her face.

Her suit was also jet black, the same color as her hair and it stretched down her arms and legs.

The suit was customized to her body, and fit her like a glove.

She could never recognize herself in this. All she saw was Athena. Her alter ego, the hero. Someone that looked like her, sounded like her but was someone she could never live up to.

" Well, don't you look nice? " Rachel teased, leaning against the doorframe.

Ryan scoffed, " I look like a cartoon character. "

" At least you're a pretty one. "

" Thank you. Maybe I can shock him with my good looks. "

Rachel chuckled at her joke, the weight of the situation weighing on her. " Jokes aside, you ready for this? "

Ryan shrugged. " Doesn't matter if I am or not, Jason needs us. "

She paused for a moment before pulling the older girl in a tight hug. " Be safe, okay? Please watch out for yourself. "

" I will. I'll be okay, we'll all be okay. "

Ryan wasn't sure if she was saying those words to convince herself or Rachel but it was now or never.

Time to get Jason back.

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Woohoooo!!! Another chapter....kind of don't like it but still!!! I'm so excited!! Thank you so much for 80k+ reads!