Mud-Blood

28.

Three days later

It was the day of the ball, anxiety ran threw Y/n all morning, Draco had been MIA for the past three days, she hadn't seen him since he left the hospital wing, she worried he had been sent away, or dead. For the past two nights she had woken up from the memories slowly seeping into her head about the attack, her death. She didn't know how her mind was remembering, but every time her eyes closed she felt like she couldn't breathe, the feeling of pressure weighed down on her chest until she sat up in a sweat, crying, and scared. The daily prophet was sent around the school, Goyle's "disappearance" was the topic, he was on the front page, the whole school was going crazy about it, Pansy even shed some tears about it. Y/n didn't know that brat had any empathy in her. Y/n just stared at the news paper on the table at breakfast while Hermione gossiped about it to Harry and Ron, Y/n didn't tell them about what happened to her, she didn't know how to up and say that the boy who is missing happened to kill her three days ago and Blaise and Draco brought her back from the dead, and Draco was the reason he had "disappeared." it wasn't an easy topic to discuss. Y/n also hadn't seen Blaise since that day, both of them practically vanished together, they were probably the ones who dealt with Goyle's body. As her thoughts roamed she looked up and saw Blaise walk into the great hall, she stiffened her back, he looked around the room until his eyes landed on her, he forwarded his head to the door for her to follow him, she stood up "I will be back" she said before leaving.
"Yes?" she asked as they walked into a secluded stairwell "Me and Malfoy dealt with everything, he told me you must not tell anyone, not even your friends" she nodded "So Draco's okay?" Blaise smirked "Im also risking my life for you as well Y/n" he giggled and she smiled "Yes, I know and I thank you. I just know what could happen to him since he was the one who did it" Blaise nodded "Malfoy is fine, well, for the most part. He went home after we dealt with it, he said it was for the best" she narrowed her eyes "What do you mean for the best? is he not coming back?" Blaise took a deep breath "I don't think so Y/n, he seemed pretty stern about going home. But he did give me this to give to you" he pulled out an envelope, she grabbed it from him and started to open it "You might want to wait until you are alone, might be personal" she nodded and stopped, putting it in her robes "So I suppose we all pretend nothing happened?" Blaise licked the inside of his cheek "I suppose."
The great hall was gutted from all the tables, professors were decorating for the ball this evening, white and silver decorations, white roses covered every wall and pillar, she couldn't even recognize the room. Everyone was prancing down the corridors with excitement for the ball but Y/n had felt the most depressed she had ever felt, not only was Draco not going to the ball with her, he was gone from Hogwarts for good, he wasn't coming at all, ever. Anyone she knew would be thrilled knowing Draco wouldn't return but she didn't feel that way, a part of her yearned for him, her skin craved his, her lips missed his, every inch of her ached without him there. Y/n sat at the vanity in her dorm room, she put on some makeup and did her hair, she told herself to just go to the ball but she really didn't want to go anymore, there was no point, putting on makeup and dressing up wont hide the pain she is feeling, her stomach turned and her chest fluttered, it was an odd feeling, she grabbed her chest as the feeling grew. She looked up and the mirror and saw her bed in the reflecting the envelope in her view, she stood up and grabbed it, sitting back at the vanity, nerves rushed threw her, what could he possibly had wrote her?, her fingers ripped the seam and pulled out a folded piece of parchment, she unfolded it

"I have no idea why I am even writing this but I thought you deserved a goodbye. I will not be returning to Hogwarts, nor will I ever see you again for your safety. I have put you threw to much pain and danger. I have realized this year that hating muggle borns and trying to be the best meant nothing to me, you did. I have been trying to understand how someone like you could cause me a great deal of conflict within myself. Im afraid I will never discover the reason why. You have brought my life a deeper meaning, made me see that my burden was seen, that my mark doesn't make me as evil as I thought I was, even though you frequently reminded me you ass."
she giggled as she wiped her tears
"I don't want you to write back or try to be an idiot and come find me, let me linger around for awhile until it is my turn to meet death. It is bound to happen sooner than later after everything I've done, including letting you in my dreams and thoughts, letting a muggle born control my life, I shame you for that. But it wasn't your fault, you were the one who caught my eye first. I am sorry Y/n for everything I have caused, I am sorry for my stupid friends who have hurt you. Blaise will be there for you as I can't anymore, I have put my trust into him to keep you safe. I hope my absence will solve everything, goodbye, Y/n L/n."